Redemption '13
Oh, gods, where do I even start? I'm not sure if I can write a coherent, linear con report, but I need to jot down some memories and thoughts before I forget. I'm in two minds about what I could even talk about in public without friendslock, which probably tells you about how comfortable and accepting the atmosphere at the con is. I think what makes Redemption stand out from other cons is that it's just so tolerant and respectful. I don't think I've ever been to another con where I've felt so okay being myself--even when you are in a geek space, that doesn't necessarily mean people won't be haughty or rude, especially given how socially awkward/blunt we can be at our worst. I keep thinking how awkward and wary I've been at other cons and when you're at Redemption, it's like you can breathe again and let your hair down. It feels like a weekend out with old friends--the sort you can exchange particular types of jokes with, the sort you can flirt with, the sort you can even yell a laughing "fuck ooorrrff" at when they say something outrageous and they will take it as a compliment--it's just so fantastic.
That, and it's just such a woman-friendly and sex-positive space. Imagine a space where you can walk around with massive cleavage and be flirty and brainy at the same time and people will actually love that? The guys won't assume they can say and do whatever they want with you and will respect you for both your brains and your tits, and the women won't disapprove or slut-shame you but will be pervy right back at you and tell you how they bought their leather minidress at a BDSM con! Really, isn't it terrifying how that isn't possible in the mundane world? I mean, shit, I've had horrible illnesses over the past few years (not to mention fucked-up relationships) and have had to fight tooth and claw to reclaim my sexuality, but only at Redemption I could finally live out my sexuality to the full. And I felt like a different person, like I could finally fully be myself and that it was okay. I was no longer the slouching, ugly fat friend who bores everyone with her hour-long Doctor Who lectures. I could strut around glammed the fuck up in a daring dress, a Gibson Girl hairdo while wielding a riding crop and watching people's eyes light up at the sight of it as they were discussing 1970s Doctor Who with me. (Wow, carrying a riding crop does add a delicious kinky frisson to every conversation. I must bring it the next time.) And many, many wonderful naughty things happened. AND NOBODY WAS AN ARSEHOLE ABOUT THE DOCTOR WHO OR THE SLUTTINESS. I can't emphasise how awesome that was.
That, and at the very first panel I was on (incidentally, that discussing BDSM het), sweetheartwhale started playing a "Snowgrouse drinking game" and took a sip of brandy every time the words "Conrad Veidt" were mentioned. (I think that tells you everything you need to know.) And since she and lonemagpie had also brought riding crops, upon Dave's suggestion we all had a Mexican crop-off at the end of the panel. There is a photo somewhere, but I'm not posting it without their permission. Watch this space, however.
Oh yeah, and I loved how Lady V's Virginia Hey's panels tended to drift into bondage about three minutes in and she kept apologising. And pretty much everybody in the room was like "nonono, you are amongst friends now! WE UNDERSTAND BONDAGE" and um, yes. It should probably be pointed out at this juncture that yes, this was a sci-fi con. And she did talk about Farscape and what a wonderful and multi-layered character Zhaan was. I missed way too many of her programme items but she was a riot, and we totally need her back again. (Get both her and Scott Fredericks back so they can be pervy together...)
Again, I realise I'm talking about the atmosphere rather than the programme items, but I also loved just how quirky the people were and how it was okay. I was roomsharing with marah_sarie and noticed she kept talking to herself. I was in the loo and was like "pardon?" and she was apologetic about talking to herself and I was just "no, no, I do that all the time!" because I was sat on the bog planning what I was going to say in the following panel and all that, mumbling to myself. And then you had this huge variety of un-neurotypical people at the con; several autistics, several genderqueer/transsexual people (probably more than at any other con, which probably again shows how tolerant the atmosphere was) and even one woman talking about object sexuality and really, it was just so wonderfully *diverse*. And yet people were respectful, even when it came to the "yeah, not my kink/identity" situations whenever stuff like that was being discussed. I can only hope I managed to be fairly polite when it came to the moments when I had to dodge socialising/generally being upright because I was getting fatigued by either physical illness or when I got talking to other Aspergian motormouths and had to go up to my room and have a quiet lie-down. I didn't have any major meltdowns, though, which was good, even if I really had to be doped up to the eyeballs to even move about and every part of my body was hurting. So when you saw me strutting about all tarted up and blathering and flirting with everything that moved, that was the real me fighting the disabled me and telling it to fuck off for once, despite the pain and the fatigue. And it was most definitely worth it. I nearly didn't come this year because I was so ill and depressed but fuckit, there is nothing more life-affirming than Redemption.
I think that a lot of the time, British fandom is way more chilled out and cuddly in general. Finnish SF fandom has been, for the most part, about haughty and chauvinistic hard SF guys and I felt no connection to that, ever. I was really surprised by the atmosphere at cons when I first started going to British ones around 2001 and Redemption is definitely the one that's most fun. I love how Sarah and I had white-taced pictures of Unexpected Naked Benton all over the hotel to advertise our Time Monster showing (Saraaah, you must put up our Powerpoint thing as a picset on Tumblr!) and how after, they got appropriated by some cheeky person (davidbrider, I think) who declared Naked Benton a candidate for the Ruler of the Universe contest. Benton got eight votes! \o/ I just love how that sort of thing can happen--and since understanding it requires you to have seen a 1972 episode of a much-maligned Doctor Who story, it's like you are speaking in this arcane language and finally find others who speak it and grok it. Likewise, someone not familiar with internet culture and lolcats wouldn't have known what the fuck when Lesley showed up as Basement Cat and blazingskies suddenly decided to show up as Ceiling Cat in response. And how people got all excited at another panel over how Servalan and River Song would totally have a fight to the death over River's red heels. (Is there femslash yet? Is there? Because that'd be awesome.) Oh, and how the words "horse meat scandal" suddenly gained another dimension when mentioned in the presence of tlanti who was dressed as... Loki. Yep.
Also, thanks to everyone who put up with my Conrad Veidt gushing and let me spam them with pictures and stuff their hard drives with copies of The Thief of Bagdad and A Woman's Face. This guy needs more recognition, pretty much, because he was in so many movies that tick fannish boxes (not just cult films but many other interesting ones besides) and was an amazing, Nazi-pwning, smart and pervy guy in real life. He was the guy I mentioned in the diversity panel where I lamented the homophobia of classic movie fandom (you know, the guy who starred in the first gay rights movie ever in 1919 and who was bisexual himself, but god forbid you mention the bisexuality in the presence of certain BNFs because they consider it an insult. Yeah). In case someone is still interested, have a couple of links where I tell you ten reasons why you should love him, a recs post of his movies (he did over 110 over his all-too-brief life) and a link to my Tumblr's relevant tag for further spammage of epic eyefucking, handporning, whips, silent movie flailing and his complete inability to smoke heterosexually or in a manner that is not elegantly whorish (there's a reason most of my "smoking porn" tag consists of him). Yes, Lesley, I've finished now; sorry about your liver.
And then there were the room parties. *sigh* The room parties. I love how when Sarah and I were about to show people the Time Monster episodes we hadn't managed to get through at our showing (really, the last two episodes are the best ones of that serial anyway), Dave and Lesley just invited us and everybody else up to their room to watch them on Sarah's laptop and there was much booze and snuggling. And how there were many cuddly and wonderful Pagans there and how refreshing it was to be able to talk about all that stuff because I'd been out of the Finnish Pagan circles for a while. (Although again, the riding crop added an extra frisson to even this conversation--try asking "who's your favourite Goddess?" while stroking one and smiling innocently and you'll know what I mean). And Dave's grumbling about how BBC/Virgin didn't allow him to make the Doctor and the Master exes in his books naturally led to me spamming everybody in the room with that glorious Doctor/Master video to NIN's Closer. Which was awesome. And greyfore shared the amazing 16-bit Doctor Who vid which I'd never seen before but which was FUCKING AWESOME.
And oh, gods, there was just SO MUCH AWESOMENESS. I'd also like to personally thank Smurf (sorry, don't know your LJ name) for being my personal white knight throughout the entire convention marry me at Redemption '15 ok and also marah_sarie for putting up with my blathering and perviness and stumbling back to our room at 4 AM. Every Redemption, I swear she is probably secretly muttering under her breath of how she will never roomshare with me again, yet she does, and she deserves some sort of award for that (oh, and for letting me show her Thief of Bagdad in the middle of the night because of REASONS). And tlanti of the Loki gorgeousness, sorry for not having had time to mount you like a powerful magic horse, but there is always next time. Also special thanks to Affordable for having ruined my little green-black dress the way it needed to be ruined (say no more! Although if anyone has pictures of me in that dress before it got ruined, let me know--I still have a hard time computing how awesome it actually looked). And thanks to the amazing committee and and huge glomps to everyone I chatted with and/or perved with and just everyone. It was an amazing convention and I hope it will keep on going forever. More thoughts to come later, maybe, when I can remember more. Still too knackered to write all of it down, but yes. It was just a mindblowingly wonderful time and it doesn't happen often enough.
Basically, *EPIC FUCKING AWKWARD NERDY PERVY EVIL WIZARD HUGS*
That, and it's just such a woman-friendly and sex-positive space. Imagine a space where you can walk around with massive cleavage and be flirty and brainy at the same time and people will actually love that? The guys won't assume they can say and do whatever they want with you and will respect you for both your brains and your tits, and the women won't disapprove or slut-shame you but will be pervy right back at you and tell you how they bought their leather minidress at a BDSM con! Really, isn't it terrifying how that isn't possible in the mundane world? I mean, shit, I've had horrible illnesses over the past few years (not to mention fucked-up relationships) and have had to fight tooth and claw to reclaim my sexuality, but only at Redemption I could finally live out my sexuality to the full. And I felt like a different person, like I could finally fully be myself and that it was okay. I was no longer the slouching, ugly fat friend who bores everyone with her hour-long Doctor Who lectures. I could strut around glammed the fuck up in a daring dress, a Gibson Girl hairdo while wielding a riding crop and watching people's eyes light up at the sight of it as they were discussing 1970s Doctor Who with me. (Wow, carrying a riding crop does add a delicious kinky frisson to every conversation. I must bring it the next time.) And many, many wonderful naughty things happened. AND NOBODY WAS AN ARSEHOLE ABOUT THE DOCTOR WHO OR THE SLUTTINESS. I can't emphasise how awesome that was.
That, and at the very first panel I was on (incidentally, that discussing BDSM het), sweetheartwhale started playing a "Snowgrouse drinking game" and took a sip of brandy every time the words "Conrad Veidt" were mentioned. (I think that tells you everything you need to know.) And since she and lonemagpie had also brought riding crops, upon Dave's suggestion we all had a Mexican crop-off at the end of the panel. There is a photo somewhere, but I'm not posting it without their permission. Watch this space, however.
Oh yeah, and I loved how Lady V's Virginia Hey's panels tended to drift into bondage about three minutes in and she kept apologising. And pretty much everybody in the room was like "nonono, you are amongst friends now! WE UNDERSTAND BONDAGE" and um, yes. It should probably be pointed out at this juncture that yes, this was a sci-fi con. And she did talk about Farscape and what a wonderful and multi-layered character Zhaan was. I missed way too many of her programme items but she was a riot, and we totally need her back again. (Get both her and Scott Fredericks back so they can be pervy together...)
Again, I realise I'm talking about the atmosphere rather than the programme items, but I also loved just how quirky the people were and how it was okay. I was roomsharing with marah_sarie and noticed she kept talking to herself. I was in the loo and was like "pardon?" and she was apologetic about talking to herself and I was just "no, no, I do that all the time!" because I was sat on the bog planning what I was going to say in the following panel and all that, mumbling to myself. And then you had this huge variety of un-neurotypical people at the con; several autistics, several genderqueer/transsexual people (probably more than at any other con, which probably again shows how tolerant the atmosphere was) and even one woman talking about object sexuality and really, it was just so wonderfully *diverse*. And yet people were respectful, even when it came to the "yeah, not my kink/identity" situations whenever stuff like that was being discussed. I can only hope I managed to be fairly polite when it came to the moments when I had to dodge socialising/generally being upright because I was getting fatigued by either physical illness or when I got talking to other Aspergian motormouths and had to go up to my room and have a quiet lie-down. I didn't have any major meltdowns, though, which was good, even if I really had to be doped up to the eyeballs to even move about and every part of my body was hurting. So when you saw me strutting about all tarted up and blathering and flirting with everything that moved, that was the real me fighting the disabled me and telling it to fuck off for once, despite the pain and the fatigue. And it was most definitely worth it. I nearly didn't come this year because I was so ill and depressed but fuckit, there is nothing more life-affirming than Redemption.
I think that a lot of the time, British fandom is way more chilled out and cuddly in general. Finnish SF fandom has been, for the most part, about haughty and chauvinistic hard SF guys and I felt no connection to that, ever. I was really surprised by the atmosphere at cons when I first started going to British ones around 2001 and Redemption is definitely the one that's most fun. I love how Sarah and I had white-taced pictures of Unexpected Naked Benton all over the hotel to advertise our Time Monster showing (Saraaah, you must put up our Powerpoint thing as a picset on Tumblr!) and how after, they got appropriated by some cheeky person (davidbrider, I think) who declared Naked Benton a candidate for the Ruler of the Universe contest. Benton got eight votes! \o/ I just love how that sort of thing can happen--and since understanding it requires you to have seen a 1972 episode of a much-maligned Doctor Who story, it's like you are speaking in this arcane language and finally find others who speak it and grok it. Likewise, someone not familiar with internet culture and lolcats wouldn't have known what the fuck when Lesley showed up as Basement Cat and blazingskies suddenly decided to show up as Ceiling Cat in response. And how people got all excited at another panel over how Servalan and River Song would totally have a fight to the death over River's red heels. (Is there femslash yet? Is there? Because that'd be awesome.) Oh, and how the words "horse meat scandal" suddenly gained another dimension when mentioned in the presence of tlanti who was dressed as... Loki. Yep.
Also, thanks to everyone who put up with my Conrad Veidt gushing and let me spam them with pictures and stuff their hard drives with copies of The Thief of Bagdad and A Woman's Face. This guy needs more recognition, pretty much, because he was in so many movies that tick fannish boxes (not just cult films but many other interesting ones besides) and was an amazing, Nazi-pwning, smart and pervy guy in real life. He was the guy I mentioned in the diversity panel where I lamented the homophobia of classic movie fandom (you know, the guy who starred in the first gay rights movie ever in 1919 and who was bisexual himself, but god forbid you mention the bisexuality in the presence of certain BNFs because they consider it an insult. Yeah). In case someone is still interested, have a couple of links where I tell you ten reasons why you should love him, a recs post of his movies (he did over 110 over his all-too-brief life) and a link to my Tumblr's relevant tag for further spammage of epic eyefucking, handporning, whips, silent movie flailing and his complete inability to smoke heterosexually or in a manner that is not elegantly whorish (there's a reason most of my "smoking porn" tag consists of him). Yes, Lesley, I've finished now; sorry about your liver.
And then there were the room parties. *sigh* The room parties. I love how when Sarah and I were about to show people the Time Monster episodes we hadn't managed to get through at our showing (really, the last two episodes are the best ones of that serial anyway), Dave and Lesley just invited us and everybody else up to their room to watch them on Sarah's laptop and there was much booze and snuggling. And how there were many cuddly and wonderful Pagans there and how refreshing it was to be able to talk about all that stuff because I'd been out of the Finnish Pagan circles for a while. (Although again, the riding crop added an extra frisson to even this conversation--try asking "who's your favourite Goddess?" while stroking one and smiling innocently and you'll know what I mean). And Dave's grumbling about how BBC/Virgin didn't allow him to make the Doctor and the Master exes in his books naturally led to me spamming everybody in the room with that glorious Doctor/Master video to NIN's Closer. Which was awesome. And greyfore shared the amazing 16-bit Doctor Who vid which I'd never seen before but which was FUCKING AWESOME.
And oh, gods, there was just SO MUCH AWESOMENESS. I'd also like to personally thank Smurf (sorry, don't know your LJ name) for being my personal white knight throughout the entire convention marry me at Redemption '15 ok and also marah_sarie for putting up with my blathering and perviness and stumbling back to our room at 4 AM. Every Redemption, I swear she is probably secretly muttering under her breath of how she will never roomshare with me again, yet she does, and she deserves some sort of award for that (oh, and for letting me show her Thief of Bagdad in the middle of the night because of REASONS). And tlanti of the Loki gorgeousness, sorry for not having had time to mount you like a powerful magic horse, but there is always next time. Also special thanks to Affordable for having ruined my little green-black dress the way it needed to be ruined (say no more! Although if anyone has pictures of me in that dress before it got ruined, let me know--I still have a hard time computing how awesome it actually looked). And thanks to the amazing committee and and huge glomps to everyone I chatted with and/or perved with and just everyone. It was an amazing convention and I hope it will keep on going forever. More thoughts to come later, maybe, when I can remember more. Still too knackered to write all of it down, but yes. It was just a mindblowingly wonderful time and it doesn't happen often enough.
Basically, *EPIC FUCKING AWKWARD NERDY PERVY EVIL WIZARD HUGS*