a.f.r.a.i.d.
dear journal,
i'm okay with growing up.
but i don't think i'm ready to grow old.
growing old is scary.
because at that time i don't know if i would have already lived my youth to its fullest.
what if i realize that i'm wanting more (when i can't have more. time)?
i'd probably be too old to turn life the way i want it to be.
i'm scared of leaving for my studies too.
what if i mess up?
i'm 23 now, i don't have a lot of time left of my youth.
such high expectations from him, i don't feel right.
how do i live with them when i'm not sure if they'll like me?
where would i run to if things get out of hand?
i have a lot to lose.
and i don't know if i'll make it.