Crossing (Out) Jordan
Dear Writers-Of-Crossing-Jordan,
Y'know, when this show first came on, I was very happy with it. The snark flowed heavily, the forensics were somewhat less gory than CSI, and the cases were interesting and not completely implausible. The whole "Jordan's Mom" thing took *WAY* too long to resolve, to the point that the show was very nearly "Crossing Jordan's Mom," but you got past that. I was proud of you. Even when you fell off the wagon and brought the brother back, I was OK--you were having a relapse, more rehab followed, you needed to attract viewers once Ms. Hennessy had her baby and you could bring the show back without artfully arranging her behind furniture (gurneys, dead bodies, ADA Brandau)...I was OK.
And Dr. Duchamps? Well, we did get to keep Dr. Winslow, who managed to stick around longer than any of the other "secondary docs" introduced on the show, so that was a bit of a trade, and kudos for the E. coli thing--didn't see that one coming. And it's largely his own fault that he wandered off to do "Hawaii," so I'm not faulting you for him not stickin' around either (and at least you didn't just kill him off--there's always the chance he could come wandering back through...). Same with Devan: she had another gig in the wind, she wanted out...the plane crash episode could have been written while you were a tad more sober[0], but the ending made up for it: it's all good.
Pollack was a bit of a surprise, but, y'know, the hero(ine) isn't allowed to have an ongoing relationship[1]--this is a permanent TV trope, I get that. The body count was starting to get a little high, though: surely we could go the rest of the season without losing another character, so we could, y'know, actually resolve a few of the issues you've been busy raising left and right, yes?
And then came Lu. Dear, doomed, "Tell Woody I said Goodbye" Lu. By the way, you couldn't have written a few more cliches into that episode? Just *had* to get out the ol' Big Book Of TV Cliches and do some copying down like a fourth-grader writing a report on banana slugs out of the Encyclopedia Britannica, did we? C'mon, guys. Woody's not allowed to be happy either? No one is? Really? 'Cause I gotta tell you: long about the time Ms. Snorklewacker and I look at each other when the show finishes and say, "Well, *that* was depressing," is about the time a show starts moving downwards on the ol' TiVo Season Pass Manager, if you know what I mean.
Get it together, guys and gals. You got a few more episodes to go, here: let's finish out the season without any more bloodshed, or there'll be bloodshed in the ol' ratings, mmmmkay?
Sincerely Yours,
Snorklewacker
++++
[1] Seriously--the whole argument in French with the boyfriend that's never explained or resolved or...well, anything, really? Just a bit silly. Either subtitle it, or move on: if you can't write the dialogue, don't put it in. Don't just put it in another language YOU'VE NEVER SHOWN THAT CHARACTER SPEAKING. Just a little random, is all I'm sayin'.
[2] And look, I get that, I really do, but what is up these days? I'm genuinely shocked that CSI has allowed the whole "S.S. Geek Love" thing between Grissom and Sara to keep going as long as they have, 'cause otherwise it seems like having ANY sort of vaguely happy relationship on one of these shows is the immediate kiss of death for one character or the other. I know David-and-Maddie-Syndrome is dangerous, but when you *always* kill off the relationship, we just stop investing in the characters at all...
Y'know, when this show first came on, I was very happy with it. The snark flowed heavily, the forensics were somewhat less gory than CSI, and the cases were interesting and not completely implausible. The whole "Jordan's Mom" thing took *WAY* too long to resolve, to the point that the show was very nearly "Crossing Jordan's Mom," but you got past that. I was proud of you. Even when you fell off the wagon and brought the brother back, I was OK--you were having a relapse, more rehab followed, you needed to attract viewers once Ms. Hennessy had her baby and you could bring the show back without artfully arranging her behind furniture (gurneys, dead bodies, ADA Brandau)...I was OK.
And Dr. Duchamps? Well, we did get to keep Dr. Winslow, who managed to stick around longer than any of the other "secondary docs" introduced on the show, so that was a bit of a trade, and kudos for the E. coli thing--didn't see that one coming. And it's largely his own fault that he wandered off to do "Hawaii," so I'm not faulting you for him not stickin' around either (and at least you didn't just kill him off--there's always the chance he could come wandering back through...). Same with Devan: she had another gig in the wind, she wanted out...the plane crash episode could have been written while you were a tad more sober[0], but the ending made up for it: it's all good.
Pollack was a bit of a surprise, but, y'know, the hero(ine) isn't allowed to have an ongoing relationship[1]--this is a permanent TV trope, I get that. The body count was starting to get a little high, though: surely we could go the rest of the season without losing another character, so we could, y'know, actually resolve a few of the issues you've been busy raising left and right, yes?
And then came Lu. Dear, doomed, "Tell Woody I said Goodbye" Lu. By the way, you couldn't have written a few more cliches into that episode? Just *had* to get out the ol' Big Book Of TV Cliches and do some copying down like a fourth-grader writing a report on banana slugs out of the Encyclopedia Britannica, did we? C'mon, guys. Woody's not allowed to be happy either? No one is? Really? 'Cause I gotta tell you: long about the time Ms. Snorklewacker and I look at each other when the show finishes and say, "Well, *that* was depressing," is about the time a show starts moving downwards on the ol' TiVo Season Pass Manager, if you know what I mean.
Get it together, guys and gals. You got a few more episodes to go, here: let's finish out the season without any more bloodshed, or there'll be bloodshed in the ol' ratings, mmmmkay?
Sincerely Yours,
Snorklewacker
++++
[1] Seriously--the whole argument in French with the boyfriend that's never explained or resolved or...well, anything, really? Just a bit silly. Either subtitle it, or move on: if you can't write the dialogue, don't put it in. Don't just put it in another language YOU'VE NEVER SHOWN THAT CHARACTER SPEAKING. Just a little random, is all I'm sayin'.
[2] And look, I get that, I really do, but what is up these days? I'm genuinely shocked that CSI has allowed the whole "S.S. Geek Love" thing between Grissom and Sara to keep going as long as they have, 'cause otherwise it seems like having ANY sort of vaguely happy relationship on one of these shows is the immediate kiss of death for one character or the other. I know David-and-Maddie-Syndrome is dangerous, but when you *always* kill off the relationship, we just stop investing in the characters at all...