You Can't

[snorindisorder]

You Cant

it breaks, loves, forgives & rejoices
but non of which you can control
its a mystery to me
i can control everything else
my weight
my actions
even my thoughts
but when it comes to the heart
no mind or map can help

you look in front of you and you
see perfection,
well, not quite perfection
because there is no such thing
but maybe an answered prayer
an answer, though it is imperfect,
you can look past the imperfections
---you wish---

wishing you could make your heart
feel what you've been longing to feel
what you know you can feel
and for some reason it just
wont beat the desired rhythm

you look around and you see
others smiling & excited for you
---why---
if your hearts not there than
rejoicing is not necessary

forcing is pushing too hard
and pretending isnt fair
so whats there to do

wait it out- in hopes the heart changes
maybe,
time doesnt hurt but then again
before you know it- your wishing
you had more

i dont know, my head is held high-
up 70 inches but its my heart that
aches & questions

and theres not cure for a

wondering/questioning heart

......or is there?