Finally Watching 40 Dayz and 40 NIghtz
So I'm watching it...it'z good. But for some reason it'z making me want to talk to Brandon....about everything...
There's so much that I wanna tell him, that I haven't for whatever reason. I wanna be open with him...even if it'z our last time talking...especially if it'z our last time talking.
Elise, Matt, Cat, Steph, and I were all talking about this whole situation. There'z a lot of what-ifz. A lot of loose endz that I need to tie up.
The bet...I sooo want to talk about that. Not having sex did not bother me whatsoever. Cuz sex is not important to me at all! It'z the fact that I couldn't touch him. The little thingz. Holding handz...little peckz goodbye. The affection...that doesn't include sex. I COULDN'T CARE LESS ABOUT IT! I want to let him know that it was that stuff that bothered me.
If this relationship endz (which...kinda goes without saying...it will) I want it to end on good termz. Because Brandon is an awesome guy. He'z so freaking great. Although it'z highly unlikely...I want there to be a chance for later. I'm changing back to my old wayz. Slowly but surely. Not getting hurt so easily. Not being a female in n-e-way. Wanting my boyfriend to be like my best friend. ONe who I can tell n-e-thing to. I want that type of relatioship. I dunno why I changed...but I don't like it.
Im gonna call him tomorrow (er...later today) and I am going to talk to him about all of this. I'm going to tell him everything I've been holding the whole time we've been going out. I'm going to tell him all the 'secrets' he sayz I'm keeping from him.
Welp...I'm done. Thanx for the encouragemant guyz. I lovez u! Ciao!
Love alwayz,
Allie
There's so much that I wanna tell him, that I haven't for whatever reason. I wanna be open with him...even if it'z our last time talking...especially if it'z our last time talking.
Elise, Matt, Cat, Steph, and I were all talking about this whole situation. There'z a lot of what-ifz. A lot of loose endz that I need to tie up.
The bet...I sooo want to talk about that. Not having sex did not bother me whatsoever. Cuz sex is not important to me at all! It'z the fact that I couldn't touch him. The little thingz. Holding handz...little peckz goodbye. The affection...that doesn't include sex. I COULDN'T CARE LESS ABOUT IT! I want to let him know that it was that stuff that bothered me.
If this relationship endz (which...kinda goes without saying...it will) I want it to end on good termz. Because Brandon is an awesome guy. He'z so freaking great. Although it'z highly unlikely...I want there to be a chance for later. I'm changing back to my old wayz. Slowly but surely. Not getting hurt so easily. Not being a female in n-e-way. Wanting my boyfriend to be like my best friend. ONe who I can tell n-e-thing to. I want that type of relatioship. I dunno why I changed...but I don't like it.
Im gonna call him tomorrow (er...later today) and I am going to talk to him about all of this. I'm going to tell him everything I've been holding the whole time we've been going out. I'm going to tell him all the 'secrets' he sayz I'm keeping from him.
Welp...I'm done. Thanx for the encouragemant guyz. I lovez u! Ciao!
Love alwayz,
Allie