(no subject)
i really want to get into photography ... i think i might get into that, maybe take some night courses in january if i can. its always been something ive wanted to do. take things that are ordinary and make them beautiful, at least i'd get to be on one side of the lens, any side is okay by me. but i will seriously look into that and do it if i can. i kinda have a fetsih with doing things over MY way, which is why ive always wanted to be a hairdresser/make up artists, doing them over to makethem feel GOOD about themselves and looking back and admire my work like a canvas, i guess which is why i love graphic design. its kathartic.
i cant wait to get my digital back when my sister gets home from school, will defenitly be taking more pictures. maybe ill stop by henrys and see if they have used stuff like lamps or even just a flash for my old pentax. i love that camera too. round up some friends and just be shutter happy. i was thinking about something today that i really feel i need to do. well i feel that we all need to do
i feel like we need to meet, over coffee like grown ups do and just talk about everything, our problems with each other, why we have problems with each other, what we would like the wach of us to do or stop doing, becasue honestly i hate carrying with this guilt of talking out my problems about somebody to someone else, i should just say it their face and they should too. we all need to reflect and look back to see where we ALL went wrong. tell each other the truths, agree to disagree respectivly. and just cry, yell, defend, respect, laugh, agree, disagree, shout, get mad, feel hurt, tell the truth.
and then we should all plan to go away, just the friends, respectivly, no signifigant others, just the old crew from back in the day, before we became the couples and grew up and maybe for one day just go back to our 16 year old selves before we all knew what would become of our friendships. just be our highschool selves where we wrote notes over lunch and swam in pools and talked too much in class and had trust in each other ... just have trust.
im afraid some of us have grown up far beyond this dream and will not agree, which i feel is my own doing, like its mainly my fault, becasue i had no trust and therefore how could they trust me, but it would be nice, wouldnt it ...?
i cant wait to get my digital back when my sister gets home from school, will defenitly be taking more pictures. maybe ill stop by henrys and see if they have used stuff like lamps or even just a flash for my old pentax. i love that camera too. round up some friends and just be shutter happy. i was thinking about something today that i really feel i need to do. well i feel that we all need to do
i feel like we need to meet, over coffee like grown ups do and just talk about everything, our problems with each other, why we have problems with each other, what we would like the wach of us to do or stop doing, becasue honestly i hate carrying with this guilt of talking out my problems about somebody to someone else, i should just say it their face and they should too. we all need to reflect and look back to see where we ALL went wrong. tell each other the truths, agree to disagree respectivly. and just cry, yell, defend, respect, laugh, agree, disagree, shout, get mad, feel hurt, tell the truth.
and then we should all plan to go away, just the friends, respectivly, no signifigant others, just the old crew from back in the day, before we became the couples and grew up and maybe for one day just go back to our 16 year old selves before we all knew what would become of our friendships. just be our highschool selves where we wrote notes over lunch and swam in pools and talked too much in class and had trust in each other ... just have trust.
im afraid some of us have grown up far beyond this dream and will not agree, which i feel is my own doing, like its mainly my fault, becasue i had no trust and therefore how could they trust me, but it would be nice, wouldnt it ...?