hey sandy
In 1993 the Sunday line-up on Nickelodeon included the following shows:
Eureka’s Castle
Looney Tunes
Doug
Rugrats
The Ren & Stimpy Show
Rocko’s Modern Life
Clarissa Explains It All
The Adventures of Pete & Pete
Nickelodeon Wild Side
Welcome Freshmen
Nickelodeon Weinerville
Family Double Dare
Legends of the Hidden Temple
Are You Afraid of the Dark?
Roundhouse
Twelve years later and during my quarter-life crisis, I started reflecting on my life in ’93 and the one I have now. My conclusion: ’93 was better. I guess I’m just resenting the fact that I have responsibilities now and wishing I didn’t take the carefree moments of 12 years ago for granted. I used to ride bikes for hours around the park and feel completely happy and now I resent my bike as it is only used to transport me to and from classes. But I suppose it’s selfish of me to think that I’m the only one going through this moment of nostalgia. As I was walking to my car tonight from the library I had a sudden thought: these shows weren’t made by 10 year old kids….they were made by middle-aged or older adults who came up with the concepts, chose the scenes, the music, the characters and intentionally made the shows to mirror the world of the average 10-year old. What they didn’t know perhaps was that they were also inadvertently creating a show which I, as a 21 year-old would look back on and enjoy but at the same time resent for everything it represents. If this was their intention, then they did a fucking good job.
So why this sudden reflective mood? I can approximate its beginning to this past weekend. The period between Thursday and Sunday consisted of nothing but drinking, movies, lying in bed, listening to music, coffee and cigarettes, bikes, and backyards. And in the few moments of soberness I started thinking that maybe THIS is why a lot of people I know from Virginia Beach drop out of high school or don’t go to college. Maybe they can’t separate these wonderful moments of carefree, hazy fun from the responsibilities that we’re supposed to adopt. And that’s when I realized that maybe I was being too judgmental…it’s an easy trap to fall into. I can safely say that this weekend I was nothing but happy…and I don’t think it can be totally attributed to alcohol. It was the feeling of having nothing to do….or having stuff to do, but choosing to do nothing. And then Monday morning rolled around and after cleaning up beer cans and pornographic playing cards from my bedroom floor, I wandered out to my car and as I reached for my keys I thought, “Holy shit, I have a car. I can drive. This is MY car, I’m not 10 years old…I’m 21.” That realization scared me cause I realized how I had totally reverted back to my childhood in four days and lost complete track of reality. And then driving to campus I saw that the sky was hazy and the leaves were starting to change and I never even realized that the weather was changing and people were continuing to go to class. I had totally stopped noticing the things happening outside of the blue house.
But despite everything, I NEEDED this weekend and I want to be able to keep things balanced. I want to hang out with everyone who frequented the house forever. I never felt more comfortable and myself when I was laying in bed singing and listening to Polaris. I want to be 21 but I want to be 10. I want to travel and see places I’ve never seen. I want to go hiking. I want to be in a band. I want to be in the back of a truck. I want to take pictures. I want to play spin the bottle. I want to eat Taco Bell. I want to be attacked by Zach in a French Maid’s costume. I want to ride bikes for no reason. I want to hear you play guitar.
I want to do everything and I want to be happy doing it. I think I can be.
Eureka’s Castle
Looney Tunes
Doug
Rugrats
The Ren & Stimpy Show
Rocko’s Modern Life
Clarissa Explains It All
The Adventures of Pete & Pete
Nickelodeon Wild Side
Welcome Freshmen
Nickelodeon Weinerville
Family Double Dare
Legends of the Hidden Temple
Are You Afraid of the Dark?
Roundhouse
Twelve years later and during my quarter-life crisis, I started reflecting on my life in ’93 and the one I have now. My conclusion: ’93 was better. I guess I’m just resenting the fact that I have responsibilities now and wishing I didn’t take the carefree moments of 12 years ago for granted. I used to ride bikes for hours around the park and feel completely happy and now I resent my bike as it is only used to transport me to and from classes. But I suppose it’s selfish of me to think that I’m the only one going through this moment of nostalgia. As I was walking to my car tonight from the library I had a sudden thought: these shows weren’t made by 10 year old kids….they were made by middle-aged or older adults who came up with the concepts, chose the scenes, the music, the characters and intentionally made the shows to mirror the world of the average 10-year old. What they didn’t know perhaps was that they were also inadvertently creating a show which I, as a 21 year-old would look back on and enjoy but at the same time resent for everything it represents. If this was their intention, then they did a fucking good job.
So why this sudden reflective mood? I can approximate its beginning to this past weekend. The period between Thursday and Sunday consisted of nothing but drinking, movies, lying in bed, listening to music, coffee and cigarettes, bikes, and backyards. And in the few moments of soberness I started thinking that maybe THIS is why a lot of people I know from Virginia Beach drop out of high school or don’t go to college. Maybe they can’t separate these wonderful moments of carefree, hazy fun from the responsibilities that we’re supposed to adopt. And that’s when I realized that maybe I was being too judgmental…it’s an easy trap to fall into. I can safely say that this weekend I was nothing but happy…and I don’t think it can be totally attributed to alcohol. It was the feeling of having nothing to do….or having stuff to do, but choosing to do nothing. And then Monday morning rolled around and after cleaning up beer cans and pornographic playing cards from my bedroom floor, I wandered out to my car and as I reached for my keys I thought, “Holy shit, I have a car. I can drive. This is MY car, I’m not 10 years old…I’m 21.” That realization scared me cause I realized how I had totally reverted back to my childhood in four days and lost complete track of reality. And then driving to campus I saw that the sky was hazy and the leaves were starting to change and I never even realized that the weather was changing and people were continuing to go to class. I had totally stopped noticing the things happening outside of the blue house.
But despite everything, I NEEDED this weekend and I want to be able to keep things balanced. I want to hang out with everyone who frequented the house forever. I never felt more comfortable and myself when I was laying in bed singing and listening to Polaris. I want to be 21 but I want to be 10. I want to travel and see places I’ve never seen. I want to go hiking. I want to be in a band. I want to be in the back of a truck. I want to take pictures. I want to play spin the bottle. I want to eat Taco Bell. I want to be attacked by Zach in a French Maid’s costume. I want to ride bikes for no reason. I want to hear you play guitar.
I want to do everything and I want to be happy doing it. I think I can be.