Daft jokes for rainy afternoons

[violet_parma]

So in my last post in my usual journal I made up a stupid snooker joke. It made me laugh because I am a bit daft like that. So I thought as it's peeing it down outside I'd do some more to cheer things up a bit. DISCLAIMER: these are very silly but I hope they make you giggle. Please do add to the list, the more idiotic and obscure the better!

Q. What do you call a snooker player with no hair?
A. Shorn Murphy

Q. Which snooker player rents out cigarettes between matches?
A. Stephen Fag-hire

Q. What do you call a cross between a snooker player and a subatomic particle? 
A. Quark Selby

Q. Which snooker player always makes sure his motor is spotless?
A. Ronnie No-sullied-van

Q. Which snooker player is actually made out of wood?
A. John Twiggins

Q. What do you call a cross between a snooker player and a baby cow?
A. Veal Robertson

Q. Which snooker player likes to hang out in a small Hertfordshire town?
A. Tring Junhui

Q. Which snooker referee lives in a rockpool?
A. Michaela Crab

Q. Which snooker player is always in a mood?
A. Peeved Davis

Q. Which snooker player is always twocking motors?
A. Matthew Steals-vans

Q. Which snooker commentator is always tired?
A. Willie Yawn

Q. Which snooker player has a sideline in flogging nectar-gathering insects?
A. Mark Sells-bees

Q. Which snooker commentator likes to wrap up warm in winter?
A. John Furcoat

Q. Which snooker player is always friendly?
A. Pally Carter

*falls off chair*