This is the Song I Write...
Here it is, another year. Nothing's different, nothing's really new...I just don't understand this holiday or people's insistence on celebrating it. This year I decided that since I've been awake for 360 out of 364 midnights thusfar in the year, I may as well make it an even 5 that I'd slept through...never have I had that much fun on New Year's Eve. I think I'll celebrate like this every year.
It does bother me a little bit that I wasn't invited anywhere to do anything fun, but really the roads were bad enough that I wouldn't have been able to go anyway. It also bothers me that I went into town today and just couldn't find anything to occupy my time, so I ended up just coming home. Now its 8 PM, I've been awake for 12 hours, and I'd like to go do something, but between shitty roads and a lack of...well, a lack of friends, I'll most likely spend the night with my laptop. Again.
I consider it kind of depressing that even when I don't have to work and its a normal time of day on a weekday there's no one around to spend time with. I just don't know what I'm still doing here...I mean, I had myself fooled into thinking I was staying for a while because I don't want to lose the ability to hang out with the friends that I do have here, but in all honesty that's something that THEY almost certainly wouldn't miss nearly as much as I would and that's a sad commentary on my social status.
Between the holiday season with a girl who isn't anywhere near me geographically and a winter that seems only to snow when I feel like driving somewhere, I haven't had much of a life as of late. I can't wait to move somewhere warmer, but how the hell do I decide where that'll be, exactly? I have options, but London isn't that much warmer than here (which would be a plus because winter fashion is much more fun than that of summer) and Texas is just too damn...Texas. California will most likely chew me up and spit me out. I just feel stuck, as I have for quite a while in this area. the difference is that now I have nothing to be here for.
My writing has come to a virtual stand-still, I can't seem to get enough time on my bass to make any progress, I'm always tired and bored, I hate my job, I usually can't find the music to fit my moods lately (a skill I've been proud of for years), and Lord knows I don't want to stay in this area, and I make enough that I can save up some real funds now that my car's paid off. Hopefully it won't be long until I'm writing this from someplace better than here.
People claim it'll all work out. Let's hope so.
-Snoman
It does bother me a little bit that I wasn't invited anywhere to do anything fun, but really the roads were bad enough that I wouldn't have been able to go anyway. It also bothers me that I went into town today and just couldn't find anything to occupy my time, so I ended up just coming home. Now its 8 PM, I've been awake for 12 hours, and I'd like to go do something, but between shitty roads and a lack of...well, a lack of friends, I'll most likely spend the night with my laptop. Again.
I consider it kind of depressing that even when I don't have to work and its a normal time of day on a weekday there's no one around to spend time with. I just don't know what I'm still doing here...I mean, I had myself fooled into thinking I was staying for a while because I don't want to lose the ability to hang out with the friends that I do have here, but in all honesty that's something that THEY almost certainly wouldn't miss nearly as much as I would and that's a sad commentary on my social status.
Between the holiday season with a girl who isn't anywhere near me geographically and a winter that seems only to snow when I feel like driving somewhere, I haven't had much of a life as of late. I can't wait to move somewhere warmer, but how the hell do I decide where that'll be, exactly? I have options, but London isn't that much warmer than here (which would be a plus because winter fashion is much more fun than that of summer) and Texas is just too damn...Texas. California will most likely chew me up and spit me out. I just feel stuck, as I have for quite a while in this area. the difference is that now I have nothing to be here for.
My writing has come to a virtual stand-still, I can't seem to get enough time on my bass to make any progress, I'm always tired and bored, I hate my job, I usually can't find the music to fit my moods lately (a skill I've been proud of for years), and Lord knows I don't want to stay in this area, and I make enough that I can save up some real funds now that my car's paid off. Hopefully it won't be long until I'm writing this from someplace better than here.
People claim it'll all work out. Let's hope so.
-Snoman