Brushing off some dust
Well, I have obviously not posted in a long time. In fact, it has literally been about 5 days short of a calandar year since i posted anything. How do i sum up last year in a short update? It is impossible. 2005 has been an incredible blur. I celebrated the New year in Italy, and will be in Glasgow for the coming new year. It has been frantic at times writing my thesis, graduating, and moving. I have been both in and out of an incredible relationship with an incredible girl. I have been to several weddings and managed to get sunburn in November because i did not put on enough sunscreen when i went to the beach. I have lost a few friends, made some new ones, and got back in touch with some old ones. I have cycled through a WIDE variety of possible jobs for my near future including but not limited to being a policeman or fireman. I have seen the northern lights many times, had a few near misses with moose, been in a car accident and began work as a substitute teacher. I have struggled with having a lack of real direction but being driven to do SOMETHING at the same time. I had the holidays at home again and moved into a new house with my parents. One of my best friend's dad who i grew up with is getting married in a week. His wife died a couple of years ago and he shocked us all with a very recent and fast engagement to a russian tour guide. My parents and i fought through having two morgages (because the original sale on our old house fell through) for longer than we would have ever imagined. I have had to comfort several friends through huge breakups and watched many more friends move in with their 'others.' Lately i have not been able to sleep even though i am exhausted. My brain will simply not stop running.
Through all of this and so much more that did not end up on this page, and as involved as i am - i still feel like a spectator. Alaska is my home, i have many friends here, but then i look and see how many friends i have scattered all across the globe. I wonder when i will see my friends again, i wonder when i will find serious direction like some of my friends. I wonder what challenges face me and if i am up to them. I have never been so surrounded by friends and felt so alone at the same time before.
I am sure that most of this is just blind rant, and that i will be just fine. I just needed to get some of this out i guess. I leave for Scotland a little more than 48 hours from now and am definitely not prepared. I am looking forward to the next adventure and hope i am up to the task....
Through all of this and so much more that did not end up on this page, and as involved as i am - i still feel like a spectator. Alaska is my home, i have many friends here, but then i look and see how many friends i have scattered all across the globe. I wonder when i will see my friends again, i wonder when i will find serious direction like some of my friends. I wonder what challenges face me and if i am up to them. I have never been so surrounded by friends and felt so alone at the same time before.
I am sure that most of this is just blind rant, and that i will be just fine. I just needed to get some of this out i guess. I leave for Scotland a little more than 48 hours from now and am definitely not prepared. I am looking forward to the next adventure and hope i am up to the task....