OOC| Follow up drabble
Continues sometime after this left off
It had been the late evening before Hugh and Mauritz had parted ways. In a few ways it had been a very pleasant way to waste away the day and in others it was unbearably frustrating. The Medic was only willing to do so much with him in his current state and the frustration had seriously gotten too the two of them by the end of it. A lot of willpower had been required to actually leave the storm shelter and return to their own bases.
The first thing Hugh did when he got back was take a shower. At the very least it eased a lot of the aches that had developed during the day and it helped clear his head a little. Still, thoughts of that time buzzed around in his head and were quite difficult to dispel entirely. Recollections of the Medic's hands and mouth kept surfacing.
Then came awful realisation.
The water was turned off and Hugh went straight over to a mirror. The condensation that had formed across it's surface was wiped away with a scarred forearm to reveal a blurry picture of a tired, frightened man who needed a shave and a haircut. The bruising on his face had faded a little leaving it a rainbow of horribly unattractive colours. Then there was the freshly burst lip and the new bruises on his neck. He examined them critically.
Obvious. So very, very obvious. He reached up to touch them and before long he was scrubbing his neck with his nails leaving the skin raw and covered in blood blisters at the end of it.
What on earth was he going to say? Was there anything that even was suitable to try saying? No. It would be a very poor lie if he tried it. Anyone with half a brain could work it out. Those kinds of bruises didn't just turn up. He felt the bottom drop out of his stomach. They were going to be around for far too long. Normally they would go away with a respawn but he couldn't have one of those at then and there or during the next battle or the one after that or the one after that. It would probably do him more harm than good to force a respawn so soon anyway but for a few minutes he was thinking that it would be worth it just to get rid of those marks.
He couldn't go back to the Medical Bay and face Klaus with them never mind the rest of the team, Sid in particular. Sid. He wouldn't be able to talk to Sid. Those marks showed what he was and marked him a liar, displayed his sick mind and Sid would have no reason to doubt what he was ever again. He had said he was almost okay with them being discreet. This was such a far cry from discreet, it was a blinking bright billboard.
He had been so happy to have the opportunity to visit the Engineer freely and now this.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
It was all his own fault. If he had stayed outside with Mauritz it wouldn't have happened, if he hadn't bothered with getting too friendly with the Medic in the first place, if he had just waited or maybe if he hadn't started that fight with Sid in the first place. Getting a respawn to attempt fixing things wouldn't have been anywhere near as difficult.
Now he was stuck and there weren't many places to go.
He couldn't keep his breathing steady, it was coming in too fast and a little ragged. A lump was forming in his throat. He needed to get out and find somewhere that he could think and consider is options or at least work out if he actually had any options to consider.
He picked up his towel. While drying off he scrubbed several more patches of skin red and raw in a failed attempt to vent some of his frustration and the growing sense of dread building up in the back of his mind. It just left him with some more tender spots. After that clothes were hastily put on. He found himself hurting his ribs several times in the process but that didn't matter. He needed to get outside.
The halls were blessedly empty but he felt like his shaky breathing was loud enough to alert the whole base. Nobody did come and he made it outside into the night without seeing a single person.
The emptiest safest place was the storm shelter and when he was in the darkness with the door firmly locked the certainty that he was alone made it impossible to keep his thoughts emotions at bay. He sank down on the bed closest to the door. His chest hurt his shaky, uncontrolled breathing being only partly to blame. Next to that there was the awful sick feeling and the fear. He had ruined something perfectly good and everyone would know. Sid would know beyond a shadow of a doubt-
He ended up laying down, curled up with his face pressed into the pillow as he tried to repress every thought and every feeling.
He spent the night thinking up worst case scenarios.
By the time morning came around he had come close to truly exhausting himself. The pain in his face and chest were quite noticeable now but he really didn't want to go back. There was food and water down there. He could manage to be alone for a while as he pretended that he could avoid the inevitable.
It had been the late evening before Hugh and Mauritz had parted ways. In a few ways it had been a very pleasant way to waste away the day and in others it was unbearably frustrating. The Medic was only willing to do so much with him in his current state and the frustration had seriously gotten too the two of them by the end of it. A lot of willpower had been required to actually leave the storm shelter and return to their own bases.
The first thing Hugh did when he got back was take a shower. At the very least it eased a lot of the aches that had developed during the day and it helped clear his head a little. Still, thoughts of that time buzzed around in his head and were quite difficult to dispel entirely. Recollections of the Medic's hands and mouth kept surfacing.
Then came awful realisation.
The water was turned off and Hugh went straight over to a mirror. The condensation that had formed across it's surface was wiped away with a scarred forearm to reveal a blurry picture of a tired, frightened man who needed a shave and a haircut. The bruising on his face had faded a little leaving it a rainbow of horribly unattractive colours. Then there was the freshly burst lip and the new bruises on his neck. He examined them critically.
Obvious. So very, very obvious. He reached up to touch them and before long he was scrubbing his neck with his nails leaving the skin raw and covered in blood blisters at the end of it.
What on earth was he going to say? Was there anything that even was suitable to try saying? No. It would be a very poor lie if he tried it. Anyone with half a brain could work it out. Those kinds of bruises didn't just turn up. He felt the bottom drop out of his stomach. They were going to be around for far too long. Normally they would go away with a respawn but he couldn't have one of those at then and there or during the next battle or the one after that or the one after that. It would probably do him more harm than good to force a respawn so soon anyway but for a few minutes he was thinking that it would be worth it just to get rid of those marks.
He couldn't go back to the Medical Bay and face Klaus with them never mind the rest of the team, Sid in particular. Sid. He wouldn't be able to talk to Sid. Those marks showed what he was and marked him a liar, displayed his sick mind and Sid would have no reason to doubt what he was ever again. He had said he was almost okay with them being discreet. This was such a far cry from discreet, it was a blinking bright billboard.
He had been so happy to have the opportunity to visit the Engineer freely and now this.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
It was all his own fault. If he had stayed outside with Mauritz it wouldn't have happened, if he hadn't bothered with getting too friendly with the Medic in the first place, if he had just waited or maybe if he hadn't started that fight with Sid in the first place. Getting a respawn to attempt fixing things wouldn't have been anywhere near as difficult.
Now he was stuck and there weren't many places to go.
He couldn't keep his breathing steady, it was coming in too fast and a little ragged. A lump was forming in his throat. He needed to get out and find somewhere that he could think and consider is options or at least work out if he actually had any options to consider.
He picked up his towel. While drying off he scrubbed several more patches of skin red and raw in a failed attempt to vent some of his frustration and the growing sense of dread building up in the back of his mind. It just left him with some more tender spots. After that clothes were hastily put on. He found himself hurting his ribs several times in the process but that didn't matter. He needed to get outside.
The halls were blessedly empty but he felt like his shaky breathing was loud enough to alert the whole base. Nobody did come and he made it outside into the night without seeing a single person.
The emptiest safest place was the storm shelter and when he was in the darkness with the door firmly locked the certainty that he was alone made it impossible to keep his thoughts emotions at bay. He sank down on the bed closest to the door. His chest hurt his shaky, uncontrolled breathing being only partly to blame. Next to that there was the awful sick feeling and the fear. He had ruined something perfectly good and everyone would know. Sid would know beyond a shadow of a doubt-
He ended up laying down, curled up with his face pressed into the pillow as he tried to repress every thought and every feeling.
He spent the night thinking up worst case scenarios.
By the time morning came around he had come close to truly exhausting himself. The pain in his face and chest were quite noticeable now but he really didn't want to go back. There was food and water down there. He could manage to be alone for a while as he pretended that he could avoid the inevitable.