R.I.P... the day before my birthday!
We regret to announce the unfortunate demise of Sara Burns, who on the 19th of July of this year was carefully perforated by a homicidal maniac. This unfortunate incident occurred in the forest in New York City. The deceased was reported to have shouted "Not my new shirt!" just before expiring. Sara Burns is survived by a yellow lab named "Scurvy". Funeral services will be held the 5th of next month.