Too many puppies with guns in their hands
I was sitting in a church last night and doing some contemplating. This church wasn't my own (interesting story) but I still learned a lot not only about the Bible, but about myself. During the 30 minutes before the service started, where I didn't know anybody, I resorted to some introspection and I came up with some interesting thoughts.
My life is a complete contridiction. In the grand scheme of things, my personality and the things that I do are in a grand conflict. Here's what I was juxtaposing.
I value order and structure. I took the True Colors personality test while I was in Nebraska for my one vacation of the summer. Primarily I am a green. Green's are the thinkers: analytical, conceptual, abstract, hypothetical, investigative.
*Once I have perfected an idea, I prefer to move on, leaving the project to maintained and supported by others.
*I am uneasy when my emotions control me
*I aspire to be a wizard.
So you see, outside of the aspiring to be a wizard comment, it was pretty close to who I am. Then I turned to my second highest color, Gold.
Golds are the ones who are loyal and punctual (two characteristics I value highly), organized, concrete (concrete, just a tad opposite from the abstract don't you think).
But what if my thoughts are all concrete abstractions, whereby my ability to think freely is harnessed to put out a concrete text or idea. Then am I a hybrid; an almost complete hybrid of Green and Gold (high school coincidence, I think so). If that were the case, I would make an excellent accountant, something that I am not going to pursue under pains of death.
That is where blue comes in. Blue is even less like me: I mean I am peaceful, imaginative, a poet and I often work in the arts and communication (my chosesn field of study.) But then it goes on to say that I am a true romantic and I believe in perfect love that lasts forever. I also bring drama, warmth and empathy to all relationships. Yeah. Right. I mean there may be untapped romantic reservoirs within myself which I don't currently know about, but for now, I will say that is a contridiction. Same goes with empathy. I have good relationships with all my friends, I'm just not the person that I would turn for a shoulder to cry on. I mean, I am adept at feeling sorry for people (sometimes) but more often than not, people are experiencing petty emotional drama which I would rather distance myself from. If someone has a real problem, I will be there in a heart beat, my shoulders are open (albeit rather boney to cry on).
I was told when I took this test that people take parts of color personalities and combine them into one. Well that may be true. I'm just wondering what events transpired to make me a contradiction. Highly value the concrete, think abstractly, while pursuing an aesthetic field.
Furthermore I am a remarkably independent person. I can work well in groups, and I have great interpersonal skills, but in the long run, I'm not going to flip out if I have to be by myself. Or so I thought. Until one fateful day in a library when things changed forever.
My life is a complete contridiction. In the grand scheme of things, my personality and the things that I do are in a grand conflict. Here's what I was juxtaposing.
I value order and structure. I took the True Colors personality test while I was in Nebraska for my one vacation of the summer. Primarily I am a green. Green's are the thinkers: analytical, conceptual, abstract, hypothetical, investigative.
*Once I have perfected an idea, I prefer to move on, leaving the project to maintained and supported by others.
*I am uneasy when my emotions control me
*I aspire to be a wizard.
So you see, outside of the aspiring to be a wizard comment, it was pretty close to who I am. Then I turned to my second highest color, Gold.
Golds are the ones who are loyal and punctual (two characteristics I value highly), organized, concrete (concrete, just a tad opposite from the abstract don't you think).
But what if my thoughts are all concrete abstractions, whereby my ability to think freely is harnessed to put out a concrete text or idea. Then am I a hybrid; an almost complete hybrid of Green and Gold (high school coincidence, I think so). If that were the case, I would make an excellent accountant, something that I am not going to pursue under pains of death.
That is where blue comes in. Blue is even less like me: I mean I am peaceful, imaginative, a poet and I often work in the arts and communication (my chosesn field of study.) But then it goes on to say that I am a true romantic and I believe in perfect love that lasts forever. I also bring drama, warmth and empathy to all relationships. Yeah. Right. I mean there may be untapped romantic reservoirs within myself which I don't currently know about, but for now, I will say that is a contridiction. Same goes with empathy. I have good relationships with all my friends, I'm just not the person that I would turn for a shoulder to cry on. I mean, I am adept at feeling sorry for people (sometimes) but more often than not, people are experiencing petty emotional drama which I would rather distance myself from. If someone has a real problem, I will be there in a heart beat, my shoulders are open (albeit rather boney to cry on).
I was told when I took this test that people take parts of color personalities and combine them into one. Well that may be true. I'm just wondering what events transpired to make me a contradiction. Highly value the concrete, think abstractly, while pursuing an aesthetic field.
Furthermore I am a remarkably independent person. I can work well in groups, and I have great interpersonal skills, but in the long run, I'm not going to flip out if I have to be by myself. Or so I thought. Until one fateful day in a library when things changed forever.