Feelin' Good In The Neighborhood
Life is good. Not spectacular but overwhelmingly satisfactory. Suffice it to say that I am really happy. Not quite joyful, my mood doesn't seem to persist through annoying situations and frustrating people, but I am feeling the good vibe most days. I just joined 24 hour fitness and although every attempt to go with a friend has failed, I have had the opportunity to hardcore Yoga, to run, and use the KARAZY eliptical machine. I am also eating less crap, such a great feeling to exercise and purge the bad stuff and then fill it back up with good stuff. My new haircut continues to be a shining success, and I leave on Saturday for HAWAII! Although there will be no income, I will wait to deposit my Tax Return and pretend it was income, and I hope not to spend too much while I'm over there (Yeah, like that's gonna happen!) Perhaps I will change from a light rosy pink color to a peach or more apricot colored skin tone. Tan just ain't gonna happen. We'll see! I have two weddings, I am hoping to look good!
Also, I feel guilty for abandoning some people. It's no fun to tell people that I simply don't have time for them. But I've also realized that as much as I care about people, sometimes I don't have much to give. I am glad most people understand, but there are still a few who don't. Oh well.
Sometimes I fear that this person that people know and like and admire is slowly disappearing in lieu of a more practical prototype. I look back and the hopeful, serving, fun, free-spirited person I used to be just doesn't survive well. I expend all of my energy on others and often end up deflated. Unfortunately I don't have the energy to be who I most want to be and I hope it's not a permanent thing. I miss my old self, but I didn't get a whole lot done as me. I worry that this practical, organized, workaholic self might be eating away at my old self but I don't want to give up all of the great things I have now just to be back in that place. Hypothesis + antithesis --> synthesis.
No uplifting comments necessary, just opening up, revealing.
Also, I feel guilty for abandoning some people. It's no fun to tell people that I simply don't have time for them. But I've also realized that as much as I care about people, sometimes I don't have much to give. I am glad most people understand, but there are still a few who don't. Oh well.
Sometimes I fear that this person that people know and like and admire is slowly disappearing in lieu of a more practical prototype. I look back and the hopeful, serving, fun, free-spirited person I used to be just doesn't survive well. I expend all of my energy on others and often end up deflated. Unfortunately I don't have the energy to be who I most want to be and I hope it's not a permanent thing. I miss my old self, but I didn't get a whole lot done as me. I worry that this practical, organized, workaholic self might be eating away at my old self but I don't want to give up all of the great things I have now just to be back in that place. Hypothesis + antithesis --> synthesis.
No uplifting comments necessary, just opening up, revealing.