(no subject)
Backdated to the evening of the 27th
I can't believe we actually did it. Honestly, I'm completely stunned. We leave in the morning, and should be back at the end of the week, and god, I can't wait to get away. After everything that's gone on lately, I can't wait to spend time with Ray, without worrying about anything else that's going on. Have I ever mentioned how cute he looks when he's asleep? I'm watching him now, from where I'm curled up with my laptop in one of the chairs, and he's just got this look on his face that...brings a smile to mine. He looks so at peace, but there's this little crinkle in the corners of his eyes, the same ones he gets when he laughs. Honestly, it's cute. Very, very cute. If I wasn't already head over heels...watching him sleep, I feel like I'm falling in love all over again.
I'm terrified though. Not of being married. That's not that scary. I mean, I trust Ray implicitly. I'm scared that Rachel did real damage today. This baby may not be the only reason that Ray and I got married, since we'd talked about it before, but it was the catalyst. He tells me not to, but I'm so worried that if I lose this baby, that I'll lose this relationship too. I love him, and I know he loves me, but...I've seen people go through that, and not come out unscathed. I probably shouldn't have egged her on, but that woman gets under my skin like no one's business.
Oh, and Michael? I'd recommend avoiding me for a long while, unless you'd like to see yourself laid up in the hospital.
I can't believe we actually did it. Honestly, I'm completely stunned. We leave in the morning, and should be back at the end of the week, and god, I can't wait to get away. After everything that's gone on lately, I can't wait to spend time with Ray, without worrying about anything else that's going on. Have I ever mentioned how cute he looks when he's asleep? I'm watching him now, from where I'm curled up with my laptop in one of the chairs, and he's just got this look on his face that...brings a smile to mine. He looks so at peace, but there's this little crinkle in the corners of his eyes, the same ones he gets when he laughs. Honestly, it's cute. Very, very cute. If I wasn't already head over heels...watching him sleep, I feel like I'm falling in love all over again.
I'm terrified though. Not of being married. That's not that scary. I mean, I trust Ray implicitly. I'm scared that Rachel did real damage today. This baby may not be the only reason that Ray and I got married, since we'd talked about it before, but it was the catalyst. He tells me not to, but I'm so worried that if I lose this baby, that I'll lose this relationship too. I love him, and I know he loves me, but...I've seen people go through that, and not come out unscathed. I probably shouldn't have egged her on, but that woman gets under my skin like no one's business.
Oh, and Michael? I'd recommend avoiding me for a long while, unless you'd like to see yourself laid up in the hospital.