Cut down before I had the chance
Did you ever see one of those really bad action movies where the protagonist is fighting for his life with the last of his strength, and gets pushed over a cliff but miraculously grabs on to one crag of rock with a single hand, leaving him swaying over the abyss with nothing but a fucking rock in his hand? Ever wonder exactly what would happen if the last thing he had to hold on to crumbled and disintegrated in the palm of his hand?
I don't have the summer. The plan was to get out of school Thursday and spend the summer focusing all of my energy into making it the most memorable it could be, I wanted it to mean enough to her that she would never forget it, never forget this place, and never forget me. Plans were made, more than anyone knows, it was to be my finest hour, my last stand before I decide just what I'M going to do, where I want to be in this life and how to get there. This plan was false. I don't have the summer. I have two weeks, starting today. Two weeks before I lose the only person who still calls, the only person who I ever see, and the only person who wants to see me. Two weeks, and then my last dangling thread of human contact is severed.
It sucks and I'm sad. Fuck sad, I'm crushed. I knew I would be, but not so soon. But besides that, I'm determined. I'll make the last two weeks count as much as I can, and then take the only option left open to me; let her go. I'm never gonna forget her, never gonan stop communicating, never gonna stop caring, and I know, sooner or later, even if it takes ten years (again), shit will work out. And if it doesn't... I have somethign to believe in, at least.
I'd be helping no one by freaking out. I'll accept fate for now.
But this leaves me with one awful question I had hoped to postpone asking...
...Where do I go when she leaves?
Peace, Love, Empathy,
/Ande
I don't have the summer. The plan was to get out of school Thursday and spend the summer focusing all of my energy into making it the most memorable it could be, I wanted it to mean enough to her that she would never forget it, never forget this place, and never forget me. Plans were made, more than anyone knows, it was to be my finest hour, my last stand before I decide just what I'M going to do, where I want to be in this life and how to get there. This plan was false. I don't have the summer. I have two weeks, starting today. Two weeks before I lose the only person who still calls, the only person who I ever see, and the only person who wants to see me. Two weeks, and then my last dangling thread of human contact is severed.
It sucks and I'm sad. Fuck sad, I'm crushed. I knew I would be, but not so soon. But besides that, I'm determined. I'll make the last two weeks count as much as I can, and then take the only option left open to me; let her go. I'm never gonna forget her, never gonan stop communicating, never gonna stop caring, and I know, sooner or later, even if it takes ten years (again), shit will work out. And if it doesn't... I have somethign to believe in, at least.
I'd be helping no one by freaking out. I'll accept fate for now.
But this leaves me with one awful question I had hoped to postpone asking...
...Where do I go when she leaves?
Peace, Love, Empathy,
/Ande