Writing Fiction is done!
Well I finished my Writing Fiction portfolio. 32 pages. I posted my first story Storm last night. So here is my other one...Christmas Cheer. I don't care if it sucks, it's done. I posted it a month or two ago but it has been totally revamped...so give it another read.
Christmas Spirit
Teddy went to the changing room and got out of his Santa suit. He slid on his ivy green Santa sweater and shrugged into his overcoat, his prized Santa hat tucked into the pocket. He could only think of the snow and how it would brighten Holly's spirit, make her believe once more. She would know Santa hadn't really failed her, that Teddy hadn't failed a child. Teddy walked down the darkened hallway towards the mall exit.
Six and a half years old and her daddy was dead. It had been bad enough when Teddy's own grandmother had died when he was four. Grandma Estelle had always been there with snacks mom and dad wouldn't let him have. She had taught him how to ice skate, or tried anyway, only ending up tying a scarf around his waist so it wouldn't hurt every time he fell on the cold ice. But then she had gotten sick, she couldn't even play Go Fish anymore. Her back always hurt. Teddy remembered her sitting in her wheel chair, looking sad. He had run and grabbed Brownie, his brown teddy bear she had given him as a baby. It always made him feel better, so of course it would make his grandma feel better too. He left Brownie with her and a few days later came back, only to find the stuffed bear sitting alone in an empty wheel chair. Grandma was gone. He had wished so desperately for someone to tell him that she would come back, something he so desperately wished he could tell a little girl, innocently asking Santa for daddy to come home. Teddy walked down the darkened hallway towards the mall exit. What a horrible night it had been.
~
It was a week before Christmas and Teddy was working double time. His laughs were harder and longer; this far into the game, Teddy knew he had to step up the jolliness. Kids were getting anxious, not to mention cranky after being forced from one store to the next. But even the grouchiest kid always left Teddy with a shriek of delight and a renewed energy; they could take whatever store their parents threw at the next, even a clothing store. It had been a regular day in the department store-the line to see Santa had wrapped around the toy department twice and even spilled over into the shoe department. Kristens, Brandons, and Andreas had all asked Teddy for what their little hearts desired, and all had promised they had been exceptionally good that year. Teddy promised each gap toothed grin that if they were really good, they might just find what they asked for under the Christmas tree. He had great faith that the parents would fulfill his promises; if the child wanted something bad enough to ask Santa, chances were pretty high mom and dad were already on it.
The day was winding down, only fifteen minutes left until closing time. A few stragglers remained, darting in and out of the bargain bin aisles, already too late to grab the hottest toy. It had been an hour or so since Teddy had had any wide eyed customers bound up and jump on his lap. He watched the snow from the snow machine dance about in the blinking Christmas lights of the department store's version of the North Pole. They swirled in and out of focus, up and down, back and forth. He was so caught up in the synthetic ballet playing out before him that he almost didn't notice the little girl standing next to his chair. She was by far the smallest of his visitors that day, with green ribbons in her ginger colored hair and a red sweater that said, “I love Santa”. Teddy brightened up instantly, making sure to be three times as jolly for this little girl-he loved seeing strong enthusiasm for Santa in society's younger members.
“Hello, little girl. What's your name?”
“Holly,” she said avoiding Teddy's green eyes.
“What a nice name. And how old are you?”
“Six and a half.”
“What a big girl you are. What can Santa get you for Christmas Holly?”
The little girl remained silent for a moment before finally turning her green eyes up towards Teddy's.
“Can you bring my daddy home?” Teddy blinked a few times. This was a tough one; it was always hard when a kid's parent had to be out of town for Christmas. Of course there wasn't much Teddy could do, but maybe he could get mommy to have daddy call on Christmas, at least that would be something.
“That's a little tough for Santa, Holly, but maybe I can tell him to call you on Christmas. Where is Daddy?”
“Mommy said he's in Heaven.” Teddy's vision blurred momentarily, his eyes focused on the whirlwind of snow. Heaven? Daddy's dead? Teddy felt his leg going numb, when did this little girl get so heavy?
“Did you say Heaven, Holly?”
“Yes, Santa.”
Teddy's leg felt like it was being crushed by a cinder block. What was he supposed to do? He wanted so desperately to tell this little girl with the “I love Santa” sweater that he could bring her daddy back, that Santa's magic was real and anything could be fixed.
“Santa?” Teddy looked down into wide green eyes; he could no longer feel his leg. He couldn't tell her that he would bring daddy home for her; Teddy knew mommy couldn't provide for Santa's promise this time. How many other kids didn't get what Santa had promised? The question ran through Teddy's head and a wave of nausea hit him like Blitzen on a rampage.
“Holly, Santa can't bring Daddy home from Heaven.”
“Oh. Mommy said you couldn't, but I said Santa can do anything. You're magical.”
“There are just some things even Santa can't do Holly. Do you understand?”
“I guess,” she said. Holly no longer looked Teddy in the eye.
“Is there anything else Santa can do for you?”
“Can you make it snow?” Teddy thought about it for a while, trying to remember the morning's weather report. Snow for that evening. At least Teddy still had a little bit of Christmas magic on his side.
“Santa can try his hardest. You may just wake up to a nice snowy backyard tomorrow.”
“Okay. Thanks, Santa.” Holly slid off his knee and walked back to her mother. Teddy watched them walk off together. The fake snow stopped falling and the twinkling lights of Santa's workshop dimmed. The work day had ended.
~
Teddy braced himself for the torrent of snow flakes he knew waited for him beyond the mall doors and stepped outside. Teddy was instantly drenched in a steady downpour of heavy rain. Large puddles formed on the black pavement. Mud pooled in the nearby dead grass. The weather channel had gotten it wrong. Teddy had gotten it wrong. Santa had gotten it wrong. Teddy took his hand from his overcoat pocket to make sure this was rain, to make sure his eyes weren't playing tricks. He had to feel the cold water touch his bare flesh to believe what he was seeing. Holly was going to be so disappointed, he had ruined Christmas for her. Teddy turned up the collar of his overcoat and made his way across the flooded parking lot to his car. He got in, the leather seats made the small space all the colder, he thought the hair plastered to his head would freeze. The car was slow in heating up. How could he have let this happen? Hadn't he always sworn no child would leave him unhappy? No child should ever be disappointed at Christmas time; of all the times of the year to be disappointed, Christmas time hurt the most. Teddy let his head rest on the top of his steering wheel.
~
“Hey mom, can we hang up the Christmas lights today?”
“Teddy, I have too much to do, go ask your father.”
“What ya doing?”
“Everything, as usual. Go ask your father.”
“Okay mom.” Teddy wandered downstairs to his father's den. The dark wooden walls decorated with the heads of four unlucky bucks. Teddy gave a small shudder whenever he saw these unfortunate creatures. His dad had even named them; Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, and Vixen. Whenever he was going to go out hunting he'd give Teddy a wink and say, “Maybe I'll bag Comet this time.” Teddy would grin outwardly as his stomach lurched violently.
Teddy found his father crouched in front of the coal black wood stove.
“Hey dad, can we hang up the lights today?”
“I don't know where the ladder is. Hand me some more wood would you?” Teddy handed his dad some more wood.
“Well how about the tree? Maybe you, mom and I can decorate it tonight. You know, together.”
“There's a game on tonight. Maybe you're mom will help you with that.” Teddy stared at his father's back.
“Yeah...maybe. Well do you know where the decorations are?”
“Somewhere in the attic.” Teddy's dad stood up and wandered over to his recliner before turning on the television. It was the hunting channel, men in heavy camouflage coats were lining up their scopes with an unknowing buck. Teddy made his way back towards the stairs. From behind he heard the loud report of a rifle and his dad shouting, “Looks like they got Comet! Hey Ted, why don't you get your old man a beer.”
Teddy wandered back upstairs, ignoring his father's request and made his way into his room. He pulled a leather bound book off his shelf and sat down on his bed. A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, Teddy's favorite. His grandmother had read it to him all the time before she died. A story that made Teddy believe the spirit of Christmas could really change people. Each year he hoped to see that change in his mother and father; he was still hoping. Teddy put down the book and went out into the living room. The Christmas tree sat in the corner, devoid of lights and ornaments. A small clump of needles sat on the carpets underneath the tree's bare branches. Teddy checked the red tin stand. No water. Once again, Teddy would have to save the tree from death.
“I won't let you die of thirst,” he said as he filled the stand with water, gently patting the tree trunk. From the kitchen he could hear his mother muttering under her breath, cursing this and that above the furious sound of a knife agitatedly chopping vegetables.
“Do you need any help mom?”
“Stay out of the kitchen, you'll only be in the way.”
“Okay mom, I guess I 'll just go for a walk then.”
“Fine, do whatever.”
Teddy made his way back downstairs grabbing his coat and scarf from the rack on the wall. His dad was still absorbed in the hunting channel.
“I'm going for a walk, do you wanna come with me?”
“Woohoo, Cupid never saw it coming!”
“Guess not.”
Outside a light snow had begun to fall. Teddy pulled his coat tightly around him as he made his way up the street. Everywhere he looked, houses were lit up with the brilliance of their candy colored lights. Trees sparkled in windows with silver and gold orbs. Wreaths hung in welcome on front doors, the snow just starting to cling to the winter green circles. Teddy kept on walking, holding back one angry tear in the corner of his eye.
~
Teddy pulled his head back from cold steering wheel, a red spot blooming on his forehead from the pressure of skin upon plastic. The car had finally warmed up, but Teddy shivered. The rain was streaming down his front windshield, blurring the parking lot into color and light, the forms of straggling customers just visible beyond the glass. One distorted form caught his attention and pulled his eye along with its hurried pace. It was Holly and her mother, they were still at the mall. Teddy's heart pounded, he could still make it up to her, he could apologize and make things right. But how? He couldn't let her know that he was Santa, she would be crushed forever. What could he do? Teddy watched Holly and her mother get into their car and saw the red glow of the taillights as the car started up. His stomach flipped in panic, there was a good chance he would never see them again, never have the chance to make things right. The car began to move towards the parking lot exit, and Teddy found himself moving along with them. He followed them out onto the highway. Was he really going to do this? What would he even say when he found them? “Hi I followed you home to say I'm sorry for not making it snow?” The mother would think he was nuts, but if he could just talk to Holly, beg for her forgiveness or...or give her exactly what she wanted, if only for a few brief minutes. Lost in his thoughts, Teddy almost didn't notice Holly's car take an exit; swerving at the last minute he got back on course. They drove through a small town decorated to its fullest for the holidays. Main Street had candy cane lights hanging from old fashioned street lamps, wreaths and bright red ribbons hung from the front of a theater built in the 1920s. More velvet ribbons clung to lamp posts and fences. Every which way you looked a house was beaming with starry lights and a tree heavy with ornaments towered in the front window. Outside of a church, the nativity rested with baby Jesus safe from the rain in his makeshift manger. The statue in the town square was wrapped up in Christmas lights and outside the police station a pine tree had been covered with ornaments made by the local school children. Teddy couldn't help but smile.
Holly's car turned left. Pine Street. Teddy slowed down, not wanting to be discovered before the appropriate time. Up ahead he saw the car turn into a driveway and shortly after, Holly and her mother were making a mad dash for the door. Teddy pulled up across the street and killed the engine. The house was cream colored with cranberry red doors and window shutters. On the door hung a wreath covered in berries and golden angels, a silver white ribbon trailed down the front of it, the ends twisting in the breeze. The bay window was bursting with a majestic pine tree, lit up with gold and red lights and an eclectic collection of ornaments. A light up reindeer guarded the front yard, casting a warm glow across the soggy lawn. Teddy grinned and sighed. He knew what he was going to do, he just didn't know how he was going to get Holly to the door. No mother in their right mind would let their six and half year old talk to a complete stranger. Teddy stuffed his hands in his pocket and felt something soft. It was his Santa hat, a point of pride for Teddy. It was the one piece of his Santa costume that was all his own.
~
When Mr. St. Claire, the head of the department store, had given Teddy his Santa suit everything had been perfect, except the hat.
“Mr. St. Claire, I can't wear this hat,” he had said.
“Why? Doesn't it fit right?”
“It fits just fine, but it's...well it's faded sir.”
“So what?”
“Excuse me for saying so sir, but the children are expecting a Santa with a bright candy cane red hat, not a dingy red like a dead leaf. I'm sure you wouldn't want to upset the kids by making their Santa wear a ratty hat. It's Christmas time, things need to be festive...perfect.” Mr. St. Claire blinked at Teddy from behind his glasses.
“If it's alright with you sir, I think I'll just make a new one.” Mr. St. Claire only blinked again and Teddy left, making sure to properly dispose of the hat, lest some unfortunate child see it.
~
Teddy smiled at the hat. Sometimes a person just had to do things themselves if it was to be done right. And Teddy couldn't have been prouder of his hat, it was certainly festive, and just the thing to wear to Holly's door. It was time to take charge. Teddy opened his car door and sprinted to the front steps. He put on the bright red hat and knocked rapidly three times. Holly's mother answered the door, she had the same ginger colored hair as Holly, but her eyes weren't the same. Rather than green she had ice blue eyes, eyes that now bore questioningly into Teddy's.
“Yes? Can I help you?”
“Just spreading some holiday cheer ma'am.” With that Teddy began singing Silent Night. Holly's mother remained in the doorway but would not open the door any further she. Her mouth twitched with a slight smile but her eyes still squinted suspiciously at Teddy.
“Mommy whose at the door?” Holly appeared at her mother's side, peering around the door.
“Holly!” Teddy stopped singing and dropped to eye level with the curious child.
“How do you know her name?” Holly's mother grabbed her daughter's hand and began closing the door. Teddy was not about to give up. He held the door as best he could.
“Holly, it's daddy! Santa let me come back to see you.”
“Daddy?!” Holly was now pulling the door back open.
“Yes Holly, Daddy came back to see you. But he can only stay for a few minutes.” Holly had managed to slip out the door and flung her arms around Teddy's neck. He smiled and hugged her back.
“Who the hell do you think you are?! Get the hell away from my daughter!” Holly's mother snatched her away from Teddy's grasp and picked her up.
“I'm calling the cops. You're sick mister! Sick!”
“But mommy it's daddy, Santa let him come back,” said Holly struggling in her mother's grasp.
“Holly this man is not your father, he's a sick man.”
“But he said--”
“I don't care what he said. I'm sorry but daddy's dead and he is never coming back, this man is disgusting.” Holly started sobbing into her mother's shoulder.
“I'm calling the cops you sick bastard.” Holly's mother slammed the door. The wreath, ribbon and all fell to Teddy's feet. The porch light shut off; all Teddy could hear was the inconsolable wail of Holly.
Teddy slowly took off his Santa hat and made his way back to the car. The rain was coming down hard as ever, but he didn't bother running. Maybe his parents had had the right idea by not caring. You don't care, you don't get hurt. Better to just go about your daily life, be content with hating your life or your love of taking the life of other creatures. It didn't matter in the end, someone was going to be disappointed somewhere, Christmas time or not. Teddy's beloved Santa hat slid from his hand. It fell with a splash upon the rain soaked pavement. Teddy stared at it. The red dye of the fabric began to run and spread; the puddle became a murky shade of crimson. Teddy watched as the hat bled, some wounded creature dying on the ground, Teddy too disgusted by it to do anything. He turned and left the hat to bleed itself dry.
Christmas Spirit
Teddy went to the changing room and got out of his Santa suit. He slid on his ivy green Santa sweater and shrugged into his overcoat, his prized Santa hat tucked into the pocket. He could only think of the snow and how it would brighten Holly's spirit, make her believe once more. She would know Santa hadn't really failed her, that Teddy hadn't failed a child. Teddy walked down the darkened hallway towards the mall exit.
Six and a half years old and her daddy was dead. It had been bad enough when Teddy's own grandmother had died when he was four. Grandma Estelle had always been there with snacks mom and dad wouldn't let him have. She had taught him how to ice skate, or tried anyway, only ending up tying a scarf around his waist so it wouldn't hurt every time he fell on the cold ice. But then she had gotten sick, she couldn't even play Go Fish anymore. Her back always hurt. Teddy remembered her sitting in her wheel chair, looking sad. He had run and grabbed Brownie, his brown teddy bear she had given him as a baby. It always made him feel better, so of course it would make his grandma feel better too. He left Brownie with her and a few days later came back, only to find the stuffed bear sitting alone in an empty wheel chair. Grandma was gone. He had wished so desperately for someone to tell him that she would come back, something he so desperately wished he could tell a little girl, innocently asking Santa for daddy to come home. Teddy walked down the darkened hallway towards the mall exit. What a horrible night it had been.
~
It was a week before Christmas and Teddy was working double time. His laughs were harder and longer; this far into the game, Teddy knew he had to step up the jolliness. Kids were getting anxious, not to mention cranky after being forced from one store to the next. But even the grouchiest kid always left Teddy with a shriek of delight and a renewed energy; they could take whatever store their parents threw at the next, even a clothing store. It had been a regular day in the department store-the line to see Santa had wrapped around the toy department twice and even spilled over into the shoe department. Kristens, Brandons, and Andreas had all asked Teddy for what their little hearts desired, and all had promised they had been exceptionally good that year. Teddy promised each gap toothed grin that if they were really good, they might just find what they asked for under the Christmas tree. He had great faith that the parents would fulfill his promises; if the child wanted something bad enough to ask Santa, chances were pretty high mom and dad were already on it.
The day was winding down, only fifteen minutes left until closing time. A few stragglers remained, darting in and out of the bargain bin aisles, already too late to grab the hottest toy. It had been an hour or so since Teddy had had any wide eyed customers bound up and jump on his lap. He watched the snow from the snow machine dance about in the blinking Christmas lights of the department store's version of the North Pole. They swirled in and out of focus, up and down, back and forth. He was so caught up in the synthetic ballet playing out before him that he almost didn't notice the little girl standing next to his chair. She was by far the smallest of his visitors that day, with green ribbons in her ginger colored hair and a red sweater that said, “I love Santa”. Teddy brightened up instantly, making sure to be three times as jolly for this little girl-he loved seeing strong enthusiasm for Santa in society's younger members.
“Hello, little girl. What's your name?”
“Holly,” she said avoiding Teddy's green eyes.
“What a nice name. And how old are you?”
“Six and a half.”
“What a big girl you are. What can Santa get you for Christmas Holly?”
The little girl remained silent for a moment before finally turning her green eyes up towards Teddy's.
“Can you bring my daddy home?” Teddy blinked a few times. This was a tough one; it was always hard when a kid's parent had to be out of town for Christmas. Of course there wasn't much Teddy could do, but maybe he could get mommy to have daddy call on Christmas, at least that would be something.
“That's a little tough for Santa, Holly, but maybe I can tell him to call you on Christmas. Where is Daddy?”
“Mommy said he's in Heaven.” Teddy's vision blurred momentarily, his eyes focused on the whirlwind of snow. Heaven? Daddy's dead? Teddy felt his leg going numb, when did this little girl get so heavy?
“Did you say Heaven, Holly?”
“Yes, Santa.”
Teddy's leg felt like it was being crushed by a cinder block. What was he supposed to do? He wanted so desperately to tell this little girl with the “I love Santa” sweater that he could bring her daddy back, that Santa's magic was real and anything could be fixed.
“Santa?” Teddy looked down into wide green eyes; he could no longer feel his leg. He couldn't tell her that he would bring daddy home for her; Teddy knew mommy couldn't provide for Santa's promise this time. How many other kids didn't get what Santa had promised? The question ran through Teddy's head and a wave of nausea hit him like Blitzen on a rampage.
“Holly, Santa can't bring Daddy home from Heaven.”
“Oh. Mommy said you couldn't, but I said Santa can do anything. You're magical.”
“There are just some things even Santa can't do Holly. Do you understand?”
“I guess,” she said. Holly no longer looked Teddy in the eye.
“Is there anything else Santa can do for you?”
“Can you make it snow?” Teddy thought about it for a while, trying to remember the morning's weather report. Snow for that evening. At least Teddy still had a little bit of Christmas magic on his side.
“Santa can try his hardest. You may just wake up to a nice snowy backyard tomorrow.”
“Okay. Thanks, Santa.” Holly slid off his knee and walked back to her mother. Teddy watched them walk off together. The fake snow stopped falling and the twinkling lights of Santa's workshop dimmed. The work day had ended.
~
Teddy braced himself for the torrent of snow flakes he knew waited for him beyond the mall doors and stepped outside. Teddy was instantly drenched in a steady downpour of heavy rain. Large puddles formed on the black pavement. Mud pooled in the nearby dead grass. The weather channel had gotten it wrong. Teddy had gotten it wrong. Santa had gotten it wrong. Teddy took his hand from his overcoat pocket to make sure this was rain, to make sure his eyes weren't playing tricks. He had to feel the cold water touch his bare flesh to believe what he was seeing. Holly was going to be so disappointed, he had ruined Christmas for her. Teddy turned up the collar of his overcoat and made his way across the flooded parking lot to his car. He got in, the leather seats made the small space all the colder, he thought the hair plastered to his head would freeze. The car was slow in heating up. How could he have let this happen? Hadn't he always sworn no child would leave him unhappy? No child should ever be disappointed at Christmas time; of all the times of the year to be disappointed, Christmas time hurt the most. Teddy let his head rest on the top of his steering wheel.
~
“Hey mom, can we hang up the Christmas lights today?”
“Teddy, I have too much to do, go ask your father.”
“What ya doing?”
“Everything, as usual. Go ask your father.”
“Okay mom.” Teddy wandered downstairs to his father's den. The dark wooden walls decorated with the heads of four unlucky bucks. Teddy gave a small shudder whenever he saw these unfortunate creatures. His dad had even named them; Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, and Vixen. Whenever he was going to go out hunting he'd give Teddy a wink and say, “Maybe I'll bag Comet this time.” Teddy would grin outwardly as his stomach lurched violently.
Teddy found his father crouched in front of the coal black wood stove.
“Hey dad, can we hang up the lights today?”
“I don't know where the ladder is. Hand me some more wood would you?” Teddy handed his dad some more wood.
“Well how about the tree? Maybe you, mom and I can decorate it tonight. You know, together.”
“There's a game on tonight. Maybe you're mom will help you with that.” Teddy stared at his father's back.
“Yeah...maybe. Well do you know where the decorations are?”
“Somewhere in the attic.” Teddy's dad stood up and wandered over to his recliner before turning on the television. It was the hunting channel, men in heavy camouflage coats were lining up their scopes with an unknowing buck. Teddy made his way back towards the stairs. From behind he heard the loud report of a rifle and his dad shouting, “Looks like they got Comet! Hey Ted, why don't you get your old man a beer.”
Teddy wandered back upstairs, ignoring his father's request and made his way into his room. He pulled a leather bound book off his shelf and sat down on his bed. A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, Teddy's favorite. His grandmother had read it to him all the time before she died. A story that made Teddy believe the spirit of Christmas could really change people. Each year he hoped to see that change in his mother and father; he was still hoping. Teddy put down the book and went out into the living room. The Christmas tree sat in the corner, devoid of lights and ornaments. A small clump of needles sat on the carpets underneath the tree's bare branches. Teddy checked the red tin stand. No water. Once again, Teddy would have to save the tree from death.
“I won't let you die of thirst,” he said as he filled the stand with water, gently patting the tree trunk. From the kitchen he could hear his mother muttering under her breath, cursing this and that above the furious sound of a knife agitatedly chopping vegetables.
“Do you need any help mom?”
“Stay out of the kitchen, you'll only be in the way.”
“Okay mom, I guess I 'll just go for a walk then.”
“Fine, do whatever.”
Teddy made his way back downstairs grabbing his coat and scarf from the rack on the wall. His dad was still absorbed in the hunting channel.
“I'm going for a walk, do you wanna come with me?”
“Woohoo, Cupid never saw it coming!”
“Guess not.”
Outside a light snow had begun to fall. Teddy pulled his coat tightly around him as he made his way up the street. Everywhere he looked, houses were lit up with the brilliance of their candy colored lights. Trees sparkled in windows with silver and gold orbs. Wreaths hung in welcome on front doors, the snow just starting to cling to the winter green circles. Teddy kept on walking, holding back one angry tear in the corner of his eye.
~
Teddy pulled his head back from cold steering wheel, a red spot blooming on his forehead from the pressure of skin upon plastic. The car had finally warmed up, but Teddy shivered. The rain was streaming down his front windshield, blurring the parking lot into color and light, the forms of straggling customers just visible beyond the glass. One distorted form caught his attention and pulled his eye along with its hurried pace. It was Holly and her mother, they were still at the mall. Teddy's heart pounded, he could still make it up to her, he could apologize and make things right. But how? He couldn't let her know that he was Santa, she would be crushed forever. What could he do? Teddy watched Holly and her mother get into their car and saw the red glow of the taillights as the car started up. His stomach flipped in panic, there was a good chance he would never see them again, never have the chance to make things right. The car began to move towards the parking lot exit, and Teddy found himself moving along with them. He followed them out onto the highway. Was he really going to do this? What would he even say when he found them? “Hi I followed you home to say I'm sorry for not making it snow?” The mother would think he was nuts, but if he could just talk to Holly, beg for her forgiveness or...or give her exactly what she wanted, if only for a few brief minutes. Lost in his thoughts, Teddy almost didn't notice Holly's car take an exit; swerving at the last minute he got back on course. They drove through a small town decorated to its fullest for the holidays. Main Street had candy cane lights hanging from old fashioned street lamps, wreaths and bright red ribbons hung from the front of a theater built in the 1920s. More velvet ribbons clung to lamp posts and fences. Every which way you looked a house was beaming with starry lights and a tree heavy with ornaments towered in the front window. Outside of a church, the nativity rested with baby Jesus safe from the rain in his makeshift manger. The statue in the town square was wrapped up in Christmas lights and outside the police station a pine tree had been covered with ornaments made by the local school children. Teddy couldn't help but smile.
Holly's car turned left. Pine Street. Teddy slowed down, not wanting to be discovered before the appropriate time. Up ahead he saw the car turn into a driveway and shortly after, Holly and her mother were making a mad dash for the door. Teddy pulled up across the street and killed the engine. The house was cream colored with cranberry red doors and window shutters. On the door hung a wreath covered in berries and golden angels, a silver white ribbon trailed down the front of it, the ends twisting in the breeze. The bay window was bursting with a majestic pine tree, lit up with gold and red lights and an eclectic collection of ornaments. A light up reindeer guarded the front yard, casting a warm glow across the soggy lawn. Teddy grinned and sighed. He knew what he was going to do, he just didn't know how he was going to get Holly to the door. No mother in their right mind would let their six and half year old talk to a complete stranger. Teddy stuffed his hands in his pocket and felt something soft. It was his Santa hat, a point of pride for Teddy. It was the one piece of his Santa costume that was all his own.
~
When Mr. St. Claire, the head of the department store, had given Teddy his Santa suit everything had been perfect, except the hat.
“Mr. St. Claire, I can't wear this hat,” he had said.
“Why? Doesn't it fit right?”
“It fits just fine, but it's...well it's faded sir.”
“So what?”
“Excuse me for saying so sir, but the children are expecting a Santa with a bright candy cane red hat, not a dingy red like a dead leaf. I'm sure you wouldn't want to upset the kids by making their Santa wear a ratty hat. It's Christmas time, things need to be festive...perfect.” Mr. St. Claire blinked at Teddy from behind his glasses.
“If it's alright with you sir, I think I'll just make a new one.” Mr. St. Claire only blinked again and Teddy left, making sure to properly dispose of the hat, lest some unfortunate child see it.
~
Teddy smiled at the hat. Sometimes a person just had to do things themselves if it was to be done right. And Teddy couldn't have been prouder of his hat, it was certainly festive, and just the thing to wear to Holly's door. It was time to take charge. Teddy opened his car door and sprinted to the front steps. He put on the bright red hat and knocked rapidly three times. Holly's mother answered the door, she had the same ginger colored hair as Holly, but her eyes weren't the same. Rather than green she had ice blue eyes, eyes that now bore questioningly into Teddy's.
“Yes? Can I help you?”
“Just spreading some holiday cheer ma'am.” With that Teddy began singing Silent Night. Holly's mother remained in the doorway but would not open the door any further she. Her mouth twitched with a slight smile but her eyes still squinted suspiciously at Teddy.
“Mommy whose at the door?” Holly appeared at her mother's side, peering around the door.
“Holly!” Teddy stopped singing and dropped to eye level with the curious child.
“How do you know her name?” Holly's mother grabbed her daughter's hand and began closing the door. Teddy was not about to give up. He held the door as best he could.
“Holly, it's daddy! Santa let me come back to see you.”
“Daddy?!” Holly was now pulling the door back open.
“Yes Holly, Daddy came back to see you. But he can only stay for a few minutes.” Holly had managed to slip out the door and flung her arms around Teddy's neck. He smiled and hugged her back.
“Who the hell do you think you are?! Get the hell away from my daughter!” Holly's mother snatched her away from Teddy's grasp and picked her up.
“I'm calling the cops. You're sick mister! Sick!”
“But mommy it's daddy, Santa let him come back,” said Holly struggling in her mother's grasp.
“Holly this man is not your father, he's a sick man.”
“But he said--”
“I don't care what he said. I'm sorry but daddy's dead and he is never coming back, this man is disgusting.” Holly started sobbing into her mother's shoulder.
“I'm calling the cops you sick bastard.” Holly's mother slammed the door. The wreath, ribbon and all fell to Teddy's feet. The porch light shut off; all Teddy could hear was the inconsolable wail of Holly.
Teddy slowly took off his Santa hat and made his way back to the car. The rain was coming down hard as ever, but he didn't bother running. Maybe his parents had had the right idea by not caring. You don't care, you don't get hurt. Better to just go about your daily life, be content with hating your life or your love of taking the life of other creatures. It didn't matter in the end, someone was going to be disappointed somewhere, Christmas time or not. Teddy's beloved Santa hat slid from his hand. It fell with a splash upon the rain soaked pavement. Teddy stared at it. The red dye of the fabric began to run and spread; the puddle became a murky shade of crimson. Teddy watched as the hat bled, some wounded creature dying on the ground, Teddy too disgusted by it to do anything. He turned and left the hat to bleed itself dry.