Back at Purchase...
i arrived back to campus around 245 this afternoon.
i no sooner brought all my stuff to my room when i realized where i was.
it had finally hit me.
i was back at school after enough time at home to get readjusted with my routine.
i tried to be positive about the situation but once i began to unpack, i hated it more and more.
i'm hoping this is just me being shoved back into a completely different lifestyle after being shoved back into my secure life at home i've known for 18 years.
all i know is, i would like to improve and change many things i do this semester.
i have a lot of ideas and goals and i would like to see where they take me.
i never thought i would cry in front of my dad.
we just aren't like that.
but i did that today. today, when we said our goodbyes.
already, i have to get up at 730 tomorrow morning for my 830 class.
it's awful. but, atleast i am done by 1010.
ugh, and now i have my mom all worried about me.
i'm quite sure she thinks i'm extremely unhappy here.
i'm not though. it's not extreme.
it's just...
having a bunch of freedom at home (finally) and then being ripped away from it... and...
realizing how many people you have in your life who you are thankful for and being ripped away from them... and...
just being torn from the security you've had all your life.
i dont have that here.
would i like to? of course.
will i get it? who knows.
it's what you make of the experience.
i'm just going to hold my head up high and hope for the best.
i'm going to try and change things up a bit for my own personal sake.
but, most of all, i would like the chance to explore life beyond the campus more than i did, or didnt, first semester.
xo
heather
i no sooner brought all my stuff to my room when i realized where i was.
it had finally hit me.
i was back at school after enough time at home to get readjusted with my routine.
i tried to be positive about the situation but once i began to unpack, i hated it more and more.
i'm hoping this is just me being shoved back into a completely different lifestyle after being shoved back into my secure life at home i've known for 18 years.
all i know is, i would like to improve and change many things i do this semester.
i have a lot of ideas and goals and i would like to see where they take me.
i never thought i would cry in front of my dad.
we just aren't like that.
but i did that today. today, when we said our goodbyes.
already, i have to get up at 730 tomorrow morning for my 830 class.
it's awful. but, atleast i am done by 1010.
ugh, and now i have my mom all worried about me.
i'm quite sure she thinks i'm extremely unhappy here.
i'm not though. it's not extreme.
it's just...
having a bunch of freedom at home (finally) and then being ripped away from it... and...
realizing how many people you have in your life who you are thankful for and being ripped away from them... and...
just being torn from the security you've had all your life.
i dont have that here.
would i like to? of course.
will i get it? who knows.
it's what you make of the experience.
i'm just going to hold my head up high and hope for the best.
i'm going to try and change things up a bit for my own personal sake.
but, most of all, i would like the chance to explore life beyond the campus more than i did, or didnt, first semester.
xo
heather