World Cup Impressions vol. 2
Friday morning I woke up early enough to actually make it to the hotel breakfast. And I even had it together enough to steal some food for Janet who had to hide out in the room. Then some manager dude came and picked me up and take me to the stadium so that I could set up and meet everyone else supporting the game.
The plan was that Michael and Tito would arrive in town in time for the Holland game. They'd meet up with Janet for partying and then I would meet up with them later and we'd all party together. The game in Gelsenkirchen was a blowout. Argentina beat Serbia-Montenegro 6-0, which is just downright vicious. Then Holland beat Ivory Coast 2-1 which put both Argentina and Holland through to the second round. So when I finally got out of the Gelsenkirchen stadium and went to look for Janet, Michael and Tito the Dutch and Argentina fans were partying in full swing. And since Michael and Tito are Dutch they were completely drunk off their Dutch asses screaming '2 to 1'(zwei einz) in German to everyone they could find.
It was a super festive party atmosphere at the pub where I found them. They had ended up at a local bar where all the supporters for the local football club, Schalke, hung out. Michael and Tito had stolen a football from somewhere and managed to got in a pickup game with some Germans. Which was touted as the ultimate game of German-Dutch rivalry. I cheered them on and made some friends in the process. There was this one trashed guy in particular with a trumpet who kept blasting out the Schalke theme every five minutes. Then he would fall into "When the Saints go Marching in". When that happened you were supposed to sing along and then drink at the end. Good fun!
Early on in the night Michael threw an entire beer at me and drenched the front of my shirt. I had made a comment about Michael chasing another girl while his girlfriend is pregnant with their child. He got pissed and threw his whole beer at me. I was not amused but was empty handed at the time so I couldn't retort. We then hugged a bunch and made up in the way a sober American can forgive his drunk Dutch friend because his team just advanced to the second round. But the American wasn't sober or angry for long.
We continued the revelry and drinking as we left the Schalke bar to go downtown. People on the bus were drunk, beating bongos, blowing cheap plastic horns and waving flags. After making it downtown we stopped for much needed Shoarma and fries. Then we made our way to a real local bar. This place hadn't seen so much action since god knows when and you could tell the bar maids were annoyed. We were still screaming 'zwei einz' and talking shit to random people. I had a conversation for a good 30 minutes with some old dude who only spoke German. I kind of understood him and when I spoke Dutch to him he seemed like he knew what I meant.
We got kicked out of that place at around 4am by a woman with a broom. We wanted more beer but she wouldn't give us any. At this point Janet and I were well gone and needed to pass out. But Michael and Tito were still screaming 'zwei einz' and wanted to party more. So we parted ways; Janet and I took a cab back to the hotel while Michael and Tito continued partying. They would sneak into the hotel and knock on the door whenever they finished.
But they never finished. My mobile never rang and no one ever knocked at the door. Janet and I awoke at 10am and I went downstairs to eat breakfast and steal something for Janet. Shortly after coming back there was a knock at the door and it was a very drunk Michael. He stank of stale cigarettes, spilled beer and sweat and the first thing he said to me was 'zwei einz'. He stumbled in and began to explain how he and Tito had stayed up the whole night partying and how Tito was now asleep in the car. He had met some guy with a dog and wandered around the woods with him drinking beer and shouting. In fact his friend was now waiting for him at the railway bridge behind the hotel. So we needed to hurry so we could meet this guy before he got dejected and left. We never did find this guy and his dog. But we did find the railway bridge where Michael had left his beer. Which made Michael very happy.
We wandered around Gelsenkirchen for a while in the sun. Two hungovers and a stinky drunk. We played on playgrounds. We harassed the locals. We ate more sausages and drank lots of water, except for Michael who continued to drink beer. He also walked up to people and said strange things to them. Nonstop. After he had asked them about their bowels or how many children they ate for breakfast these confused people would approach Janet and I.
"I can't understand a word that one says", they would say.
Or
"I think your friend is very drunk". Good observation! No shit, one time Michael asked this guy if he farted all the time like Michael did. We got some strange looks...
In kind of a defacto way Janet and I became the caretakers of this stinky drunk Dutchman and his 'zwei einz'. It was undoubtedly entertaining but at the same time exhausting and embarrassing. When Michael walked into a bridal shop and asked to get fitted for a dress I almost lost it. I walked away amazed at the patience of the people of Gelsenkirchen. We found the Euro store where everything is 1 Euro and Janet bought a whole bag full of goodies. She scored 8 toothbrushes for 1 Euro and gave one to Michael. Now he was a stinky drunk with a toothbrush in his mouth and there was no stopping him. We crashed on a terrace and got coffee while Michael continued to heckle and bedeckle. He spent a good 30 minutes just talking to the guy minding the public toilets.
After all this fun and excitement I had to go meet my buddy Jermaine at Gelsenkirchen Central Station and drive to Kaiserslautern. We were going to watch the USA play Italy and hopefully win. I bode Janet and Michael farewell and made my way to Central Station. I was pretty tired of the drunk antics at this point anyways. That shit is only entertaining for so long.
Jermaine's train arrived at 1430 and I met him at the station. We hopped in the car and started driving to Kaiserslautern. Tune in tomorrow for more stream of consciousness gallivanting in 'On the Road with Smutticus and Jermaine'...
The plan was that Michael and Tito would arrive in town in time for the Holland game. They'd meet up with Janet for partying and then I would meet up with them later and we'd all party together. The game in Gelsenkirchen was a blowout. Argentina beat Serbia-Montenegro 6-0, which is just downright vicious. Then Holland beat Ivory Coast 2-1 which put both Argentina and Holland through to the second round. So when I finally got out of the Gelsenkirchen stadium and went to look for Janet, Michael and Tito the Dutch and Argentina fans were partying in full swing. And since Michael and Tito are Dutch they were completely drunk off their Dutch asses screaming '2 to 1'(zwei einz) in German to everyone they could find.
It was a super festive party atmosphere at the pub where I found them. They had ended up at a local bar where all the supporters for the local football club, Schalke, hung out. Michael and Tito had stolen a football from somewhere and managed to got in a pickup game with some Germans. Which was touted as the ultimate game of German-Dutch rivalry. I cheered them on and made some friends in the process. There was this one trashed guy in particular with a trumpet who kept blasting out the Schalke theme every five minutes. Then he would fall into "When the Saints go Marching in". When that happened you were supposed to sing along and then drink at the end. Good fun!
Early on in the night Michael threw an entire beer at me and drenched the front of my shirt. I had made a comment about Michael chasing another girl while his girlfriend is pregnant with their child. He got pissed and threw his whole beer at me. I was not amused but was empty handed at the time so I couldn't retort. We then hugged a bunch and made up in the way a sober American can forgive his drunk Dutch friend because his team just advanced to the second round. But the American wasn't sober or angry for long.
We continued the revelry and drinking as we left the Schalke bar to go downtown. People on the bus were drunk, beating bongos, blowing cheap plastic horns and waving flags. After making it downtown we stopped for much needed Shoarma and fries. Then we made our way to a real local bar. This place hadn't seen so much action since god knows when and you could tell the bar maids were annoyed. We were still screaming 'zwei einz' and talking shit to random people. I had a conversation for a good 30 minutes with some old dude who only spoke German. I kind of understood him and when I spoke Dutch to him he seemed like he knew what I meant.
We got kicked out of that place at around 4am by a woman with a broom. We wanted more beer but she wouldn't give us any. At this point Janet and I were well gone and needed to pass out. But Michael and Tito were still screaming 'zwei einz' and wanted to party more. So we parted ways; Janet and I took a cab back to the hotel while Michael and Tito continued partying. They would sneak into the hotel and knock on the door whenever they finished.
But they never finished. My mobile never rang and no one ever knocked at the door. Janet and I awoke at 10am and I went downstairs to eat breakfast and steal something for Janet. Shortly after coming back there was a knock at the door and it was a very drunk Michael. He stank of stale cigarettes, spilled beer and sweat and the first thing he said to me was 'zwei einz'. He stumbled in and began to explain how he and Tito had stayed up the whole night partying and how Tito was now asleep in the car. He had met some guy with a dog and wandered around the woods with him drinking beer and shouting. In fact his friend was now waiting for him at the railway bridge behind the hotel. So we needed to hurry so we could meet this guy before he got dejected and left. We never did find this guy and his dog. But we did find the railway bridge where Michael had left his beer. Which made Michael very happy.
We wandered around Gelsenkirchen for a while in the sun. Two hungovers and a stinky drunk. We played on playgrounds. We harassed the locals. We ate more sausages and drank lots of water, except for Michael who continued to drink beer. He also walked up to people and said strange things to them. Nonstop. After he had asked them about their bowels or how many children they ate for breakfast these confused people would approach Janet and I.
"I can't understand a word that one says", they would say.
Or
"I think your friend is very drunk". Good observation! No shit, one time Michael asked this guy if he farted all the time like Michael did. We got some strange looks...
In kind of a defacto way Janet and I became the caretakers of this stinky drunk Dutchman and his 'zwei einz'. It was undoubtedly entertaining but at the same time exhausting and embarrassing. When Michael walked into a bridal shop and asked to get fitted for a dress I almost lost it. I walked away amazed at the patience of the people of Gelsenkirchen. We found the Euro store where everything is 1 Euro and Janet bought a whole bag full of goodies. She scored 8 toothbrushes for 1 Euro and gave one to Michael. Now he was a stinky drunk with a toothbrush in his mouth and there was no stopping him. We crashed on a terrace and got coffee while Michael continued to heckle and bedeckle. He spent a good 30 minutes just talking to the guy minding the public toilets.
After all this fun and excitement I had to go meet my buddy Jermaine at Gelsenkirchen Central Station and drive to Kaiserslautern. We were going to watch the USA play Italy and hopefully win. I bode Janet and Michael farewell and made my way to Central Station. I was pretty tired of the drunk antics at this point anyways. That shit is only entertaining for so long.
Jermaine's train arrived at 1430 and I met him at the station. We hopped in the car and started driving to Kaiserslautern. Tune in tomorrow for more stream of consciousness gallivanting in 'On the Road with Smutticus and Jermaine'...