Sporking The Coach That Never Came - Chapter 10
10. A Surprise
So, our Darwin Award candidate characters have found the man with the gun again. And we find out who the villain is.
"Peter," cried Mrs. Weber, "it's you." Apparently he's a Sith Lord, too, or at least an evil Jedi, since they never once considered that it could be Pete Dobbs, and the Force does have a strong influence on the weak minded. ... ... Wait. Suddenly I have a whole new reason to dislike the author. I just realized that the villain has the same name as the main character's love interest and eventual husband in the Judy Bolton mysteries. This is probably coincidence, since that series is long out of print*, but it is irritating none-the-less -- largely because it's a reminder that I could be reading a good kids' mystery and am instead reading this. *sad face*
"Yes, Mrs. Weber, it's me." Dobb's face twisted into a snarl of anger. Why? "I heard you coming, so I waited for you. WHY!? You found the coach and the bones, If you know that, you had more than enough time to get out however you got in. Why would you wait for them? but you couldn't be satisfied with that, could you? No, you had to come nosing around some more. I wish you hadn't done that." What is this guy's motivation? His voice rose as he pointed to the canvas bag. "I've got the stagecoach gold, and you can see I've got the pistol, too." That's nice. What do you think you're going to do with gold from 1873? Somehow I don't think you can just walk into a bank with it. You're a watch and clock repairman, do you have connections to coin collectors? What is your plan, dude?
It turns out he doesn't have a plan. He's crazy. No, really. That is his entire motivation. Your son, Lance, who got to live in a big fancy house, used to tease me at school about how crazy I was. Well, I'm not crazy, and I'll take the time to tell you why now that you're here. Oh, good, he's monologueing. What genre is this book? Anyway, he followed them from the shop because he wanted to beat them to the money. He stole the letter and buckle. And he knew Paul and Grandma were out because he'd been watching the house. His great-grandfather's brother (what, not his father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate?) was part of Frank Hart/Kid Ruby's gang. You come along from the East and stumble onto something that me and my family have been looking for for over a hundred years. WHY!!!!???? We Dobbses have kept what we knew to ourselves, and for years my family's dug around here for the gold. I started digging with my father when I was in grade school. But...but... why? I mean, I get the urge to treasure hunt, but why this particular treasure and why go after it in a way that will make it really damn hard for you to actually profit from it unless you have a market for the gold. A market that won't care where and how you got it.
"One of my kinfolk rode with Kid Ruby, and my family's been looking for the gang's loot for over a hundred years. So I've got a right to it!"
Alrighty then.
"You're so proud of your old-time Utes. [he says to Jay - who he met once that we know of and has not, in the book ever mentioned Utes to him] Well, how do you think Kid Ruby knew about this cave when other white men didn't? A Ute told him -- that's how he found out. He goes on to explain that Frank Hart had a Ute wife before marrying Grandma's great aunt whoever and fathering Billy Smart.
Jay is upset about robbers using a Ute cave. Dobbs is just pleased he finally has the gold because he's the villain. I have a headache. Jay calls him crazy, because that's a good thing to call the villain.
"Crazy, huh?" Dobbs patted the canvas sack. "Crazy rich, that's more like it! What do you think gold that was worth forty thousand dollars in 1873 is worth today?" Doesn't that kind of depend on how you're going to dispose of it? I'm pretty sure you can't just walk into a bank with it, especially if you're planning to off the people you're gloating at. The logic is not strong with this book. He gives Paul back the belt buckle, for some reason. Not that I even know why he stole it in the first place. The directions he used to get into the cave were on the letter.
He leaves them there with this warning. I'm not going to shoot or harm you. I'm not even going to waste my time tying you up again. But I am going to remind you all that I do have a gun, and that it's loaded. So don't try to follow me. I will use it if I really have to. I'll find the way you got in. You undoubtedly left it open. Nice of you. Well, I'll be polite. I'll close it for you when I leave!"
"Close it?" cried Mrs. Weber, scrambling to her feet. "You'll be killing us!"
He kind of has to now, what with having committed crimes against you. But I think you're forgetting about the way Dobbs got in. He didn't know there was another way out, so presumably he left the rope so he could get out again. He's clearly forgotten about it as well, but that doesn't mean you can't use it.
Of course, in this book, this does not occur to them. Instead, well, I'll let Paul explain the plan: Jay and I are going to follow Dobbs and jump him before he gets away.
Grandma objects, but Jay and Paul talk her into it and the two of them sneak off down the dark narrow tunnel. Along the way they find Dobbs' rope hanging from somewhere above. Do they now realize that there's another way out? No. They decide they can tie him up with it.
Anyone got a triple facepalm? I think we need one.
Then a shot rings out. They hide and listen to the sound of a fight. Then they hear someone coming toward them and see the light of a flashlight.
Dobbs? Terror dampened Paul's face with cold sweat.
Or whoever he fought with. Which could be good or bad, of course, but you don't think he shot at and had a fight with himself do you? Wait, in this book... you very well might. -_-
*The library in the tiny town of Clarinda, Iowa, where I lived as a young kid had many books that were long out of print. I also read the Dana Girls mysteries - a less well known Strathmeyer Syndicate series - and original versions of Hardy Boys books. This entry was originally posted at http://smurasaki.dreamwidth.org/88092.html.