C'est La Vie, Mon Cheri, a gift for enchantedteapot
Recipient: enchantedteapot
Title: C'est La Vie, Mon Chéri
Author: sarahyyy
Rating: PG-13 for innuendos
Word Count: 1926
Summary: In which Rose is not really annoyed and Scorpius spews out pickup lines.
Notes/Warning: Lots of thanks to hondagirll for the amazing beta work! ♥ That being said, all the mistakes herein are mine and mine alone.
i.
“Good morning, Weasley,” he greets as he walks to her desk, “I got an important call regarding you this morning.”
She ignores him in favour of her paperwork. It is only when he decides to sit on her desk and, subsequently, on top of all her papers that she looks up, glaring.
“Surely you’re a bit curious. Ask me why,” he says, flashing a charming smile at her.
She rolls her eyes but complies, knowing that he isn’t going to leave her alone unless she does. “Why?”
“My healer called to inform me that I wouldn’t be able to live long without a heart.” He sighs almost theatrically. “I’m afraid you have to give me yours in return for taking mine.”
“Or you can just take yours back. I have no use for a heart as shriveled and as black as yours,” she replies without menace, snorting. “Get off my desk and piss off, Malfoy.”
Rose Weasley has very low tolerance for two kinds of people, first of which being idiots and the second of which being jackasses. Scorpius Malfoy happens to fall stark in between the two and has the added bonuses of being an extremely annoying ex-Slytherin and being highly determined to score a date with her.
“I’ll get off your desk when you agree to go out for drinks with me,” he offers with a light shrug.
Rose doesn’t answer him.
Scorpius wisely chooses to get off her desk when he notices her hand creeping to her wand.
“One day, Weasley,” he calls when he is at a safe distance, “One day I will wear you down!”
ii.
“I just changed my sheets into a very nice shade of maroon after you told me that you weren’t into grey,” Scorpius tells Rose almost conversationally one day when they’re on the job.
She snorts and doesn’t take her eyes off the runes that they are supposed to be translating together. “I can imagine that maroon sheets would contrast highly with your skin tone.”
He sighs and presses his wrist to his forehead in an overdramatic move. “What can I say? Certain sacrifices were necessary to be made. Now your hair and my pillowcase are perfectly colour coordinated.”
Rose has to grind her teeth together and remind herself that she loves her job and that it pays her well. Her hand twitches with the urge to grab her wand and hex some sense into him though.
Scorpius frowns deeply when he realizes that she hasn’t been listening to him. “Are you not fond of maroon?” he asks concernedly. “I could have them changed into burgundy if you think it would suit your tastes more.”
She rolls her eyes.
“I quite liked carmine and Persian red too, if you’re amendable,” he adds as an afterthought, “Burgundy is a bit too tacky, is it not, darling?”
When he goes into a long lecture of the difference between the many shades of red and how they would or would not suit her hair, Rose squeezes her eyes shut and wishes for the day to pass faster.
iii.
Rose has never liked Ministry parties; the booze is cheap and the company is atrocious at best seeing as how both James and Albus aren’t present due to a stakeout that the Auror Department was having. Asking her to attend this party as the Gringotts Representative was highly uncalled for.
She downs her shot in one go and motions to the bartender for another one.
“Bad day?” a familiar voice comes from behind and Rose turns around to see Louis.
“Louis!” she exclaims, waiting for her cousin to set down the two firewhiskies in his hands before pulling him into an enthusiastic hug. “I had no idea you were back!”
“And I had no idea you were dating Scorpius Malfoy,” Louis shoots back with a sly smirk.
Rose’s jaw drops. “I am not!”
Louis shakes his head almost reprovingly. “He told me all about your lovers’ tiff.” Louis waves her strangled gurgle of protest off and hands her a firewhiskey. “He is very apologetic and see!” he motions to the glass of firewhiskey she is pressing against her lips, “He even knows you well enough to know that flowers and chocolates wouldn’t work on you.”
Rose sets her glass down without touching its contents. “I am going to kill him one day,” she snarls.
“He isn’t that bad,” Louis defends, patting her shoulder gently, “He’s got a wicked sense of humour and he seems to really like you. Ah, look, here he comes. Be nice, Rose.”
Rose lets her head hit down hard against the bar top repeatedly when she hears the drawl that unmistakably belong to Scorpius.
“Hello, darling,” he murmurs as he slides into the seat next to her.
She looks up and directs a lethal glare at him. “Call me darling one more time,” she challenges.
He leans forward, closing the distance between them and whispers, “Darling.”
Rose growls and reaches down for her wand, only to find it missing. “What have you done to my wand, Malfoy?”
Scorpius schools a look of innocence on his face though the hint of a smirk is apparent. “Why would you assume that I have anything to do with it? Do you have absolutely no faith in me at all?”
She gives him a look. “Surrender my wand right now.”
“Or what…” his eyebrows raise slightly in question, “darling?”
Rose groans. “How can one man be so endlessly disappointing?”
He winks at her. “That’s my charm.” Then as an afterthought he adds, “Although I have to profess that it isn’t my only charm.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
Louis rolls his eyes. “Oh merde, just kiss her and cut with the foreplay already!” he says, bored.
Scorpius’ eyes light up at the idea.
Rose throws her hands up in the air in annoyance and stalks away.
She really, really hates Ministry parties.
iv.
Rose sits on the steps of a rather fancy restaurant and she is acutely aware of two things: firstly, it is probably going to rain soon and secondly, she looks pathetic. This is going to be the last time she ever listens to Victoire when she sets her up on a blind date.
She sighs tiredly.
There is no way her night could get any worse.
“Even though the ugly lights shine bright above us, you still look beautiful,” a voice calls from behind and even if she hadn’t been able to recognize his voice, there is only one person she knows who comes up with such cheesy lines.
“Go away, Malfoy,” she moans tiredly. Isn’t it bad enough that she had just gotten groped by an overly amorous Frenchman?
As expected, he doesn’t do as she says and instead sits down right next to her on the steps. “Why are you sitting out here, Weasley?” He stretches his legs before him. “Did a date go wrong?”
She frowns. “I’m not in the mood for this,” she tells him, “I’d really prefer to be alone right now.”
“Don’t frown, darling,” he murmurs, “You’ll never know who might be falling in love with your smile.”
Rose shakes her head bemusedly at that and turns to look at him. Her eyes narrow suddenly. “Are you seriously still hitting on me whilst holding your date’s shoes?”
Scorpius grins sheepishly. “Would you believe me if I told you that these are my mother’s shoes?”
She snorts a laugh before she stands up and brushes the dust off her dress. “I’m leaving now. You best be going back to her.”
It isn’t until she reaches home that she realizes that meeting Scorpius was the best thing that has happened to her the whole night.
v.
She starts to tolerate him after that.
“So, darling,” Scorpius says cheerily as he waltzes into their office in Gringotts, “Apart from being sexy, what else do you do for a living?”
Rose just rolls her eyes. “I put up with cheesy pickup lines from this really annoying colleague and Gringotts pays me quite well for it.”
He laughs. “It sounds like a brilliant job. You are one very lucky witch. Any chance your job description includes going out for a drink with your annoying colleague?”
She shakes her head in amusement. “Better luck next time, Malfoy.”
vi.
“This might sound highly inappropriate, but something tells me I should give it a shot,” Scorpius starts as he sets a cup of coffee on her desk.
Rose looks up from a set of runes that she was trying to translate. “Hit me with your best, Malfoy.”
He grins and brushes lint off his robes. “You are like a bottle of Skele-Gro,” he pauses for dramatic effect, “you're growing me a bone.”
She chuckles. “Now you’re just growing desperate, Malfoy.”
“Will you go out for drinks with me?” He sits down at his desk and sighs deeply. “My love for you burns like a dying phoenix.”
Rose gives him a pointed look. “That one is just plain bad.”
He winces. “I know.”
vii.
“Are you using the Confundus charm or are you just naturally mind blowing?”
Rose pinches her lips together to stop a smile from escaping even as she palms the walls, searching for an exit to the cave they were currently trapped in. “This isn’t the time for pickup lines, Malfoy,” she whispers, “You might just set off something.”
Scorpius pointedly ignores her and continues, “Being without you is like being afflicted with the Cruciatus Curse.”
“Really, Malfoy, if you set off a trap while we are stuck here, I will murder you.” She tries to be stern but the corner of her lips curl up slightly.
He doesn’t stop; it’s not that she expects him to. “I’ve been whomping my willow thinking about you.”
She elbows him in the ribs but laughs anyway. “You are incorigi-”
There is mist before them and when it subsides, there is a doorway right before them.
“I am incorrigibly smart,” Scorpius finishes, sending a wink her way.
viii.
Rose is just about to wrap up for the day and go home for some well deserved rest when Scorpius plops onto her desk again. “Every time I hear your voice it reverberates within my soul,” he tells her with a heartfelt sigh. “I'm going to blazon my love for you all over town.”
“You are impossible,” is her quick reply.
He hops off her desk, still grinning. “Let’s go out and grab a drink?”
There is a long pause in which Rose actually considers the idea. “Yes,” she finally says and she sounds surprised, even to herself.
Scorpius’ jaw drops and his eyes are wide with shock. “I beg your pardon?” manages to find its way out of his throat.
She looks amused. “I said ‘yes’.”
“As in yes, you will go out for a drink with me?” Scorpius asks, still looking bewildered.
Rose rolls her eyes. “Yes, I will go out for a drink with you,” she clarifies, “Although, if you keep up with your questions-”
She doesn’t get to finish her sentence.
“No question, no problem!” he exclaims, clapping his hands together in glee.
Rose smiles at the joy on his face and thinks to herself that maybe she should have gone out with him a lot earlier.
ix.
The night after their first date, Scorpius goes home and starts planning their wedding.
It does come out as he planned. Not as soon as he would have liked, but it does happen and that is what counts, isn’t it?
Title: C'est La Vie, Mon Chéri
Author: sarahyyy
Rating: PG-13 for innuendos
Word Count: 1926
Summary: In which Rose is not really annoyed and Scorpius spews out pickup lines.
Notes/Warning: Lots of thanks to hondagirll for the amazing beta work! ♥ That being said, all the mistakes herein are mine and mine alone.
i.
“Good morning, Weasley,” he greets as he walks to her desk, “I got an important call regarding you this morning.”
She ignores him in favour of her paperwork. It is only when he decides to sit on her desk and, subsequently, on top of all her papers that she looks up, glaring.
“Surely you’re a bit curious. Ask me why,” he says, flashing a charming smile at her.
She rolls her eyes but complies, knowing that he isn’t going to leave her alone unless she does. “Why?”
“My healer called to inform me that I wouldn’t be able to live long without a heart.” He sighs almost theatrically. “I’m afraid you have to give me yours in return for taking mine.”
“Or you can just take yours back. I have no use for a heart as shriveled and as black as yours,” she replies without menace, snorting. “Get off my desk and piss off, Malfoy.”
Rose Weasley has very low tolerance for two kinds of people, first of which being idiots and the second of which being jackasses. Scorpius Malfoy happens to fall stark in between the two and has the added bonuses of being an extremely annoying ex-Slytherin and being highly determined to score a date with her.
“I’ll get off your desk when you agree to go out for drinks with me,” he offers with a light shrug.
Rose doesn’t answer him.
Scorpius wisely chooses to get off her desk when he notices her hand creeping to her wand.
“One day, Weasley,” he calls when he is at a safe distance, “One day I will wear you down!”
ii.
“I just changed my sheets into a very nice shade of maroon after you told me that you weren’t into grey,” Scorpius tells Rose almost conversationally one day when they’re on the job.
She snorts and doesn’t take her eyes off the runes that they are supposed to be translating together. “I can imagine that maroon sheets would contrast highly with your skin tone.”
He sighs and presses his wrist to his forehead in an overdramatic move. “What can I say? Certain sacrifices were necessary to be made. Now your hair and my pillowcase are perfectly colour coordinated.”
Rose has to grind her teeth together and remind herself that she loves her job and that it pays her well. Her hand twitches with the urge to grab her wand and hex some sense into him though.
Scorpius frowns deeply when he realizes that she hasn’t been listening to him. “Are you not fond of maroon?” he asks concernedly. “I could have them changed into burgundy if you think it would suit your tastes more.”
She rolls her eyes.
“I quite liked carmine and Persian red too, if you’re amendable,” he adds as an afterthought, “Burgundy is a bit too tacky, is it not, darling?”
When he goes into a long lecture of the difference between the many shades of red and how they would or would not suit her hair, Rose squeezes her eyes shut and wishes for the day to pass faster.
iii.
Rose has never liked Ministry parties; the booze is cheap and the company is atrocious at best seeing as how both James and Albus aren’t present due to a stakeout that the Auror Department was having. Asking her to attend this party as the Gringotts Representative was highly uncalled for.
She downs her shot in one go and motions to the bartender for another one.
“Bad day?” a familiar voice comes from behind and Rose turns around to see Louis.
“Louis!” she exclaims, waiting for her cousin to set down the two firewhiskies in his hands before pulling him into an enthusiastic hug. “I had no idea you were back!”
“And I had no idea you were dating Scorpius Malfoy,” Louis shoots back with a sly smirk.
Rose’s jaw drops. “I am not!”
Louis shakes his head almost reprovingly. “He told me all about your lovers’ tiff.” Louis waves her strangled gurgle of protest off and hands her a firewhiskey. “He is very apologetic and see!” he motions to the glass of firewhiskey she is pressing against her lips, “He even knows you well enough to know that flowers and chocolates wouldn’t work on you.”
Rose sets her glass down without touching its contents. “I am going to kill him one day,” she snarls.
“He isn’t that bad,” Louis defends, patting her shoulder gently, “He’s got a wicked sense of humour and he seems to really like you. Ah, look, here he comes. Be nice, Rose.”
Rose lets her head hit down hard against the bar top repeatedly when she hears the drawl that unmistakably belong to Scorpius.
“Hello, darling,” he murmurs as he slides into the seat next to her.
She looks up and directs a lethal glare at him. “Call me darling one more time,” she challenges.
He leans forward, closing the distance between them and whispers, “Darling.”
Rose growls and reaches down for her wand, only to find it missing. “What have you done to my wand, Malfoy?”
Scorpius schools a look of innocence on his face though the hint of a smirk is apparent. “Why would you assume that I have anything to do with it? Do you have absolutely no faith in me at all?”
She gives him a look. “Surrender my wand right now.”
“Or what…” his eyebrows raise slightly in question, “darling?”
Rose groans. “How can one man be so endlessly disappointing?”
He winks at her. “That’s my charm.” Then as an afterthought he adds, “Although I have to profess that it isn’t my only charm.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
Louis rolls his eyes. “Oh merde, just kiss her and cut with the foreplay already!” he says, bored.
Scorpius’ eyes light up at the idea.
Rose throws her hands up in the air in annoyance and stalks away.
She really, really hates Ministry parties.
iv.
Rose sits on the steps of a rather fancy restaurant and she is acutely aware of two things: firstly, it is probably going to rain soon and secondly, she looks pathetic. This is going to be the last time she ever listens to Victoire when she sets her up on a blind date.
She sighs tiredly.
There is no way her night could get any worse.
“Even though the ugly lights shine bright above us, you still look beautiful,” a voice calls from behind and even if she hadn’t been able to recognize his voice, there is only one person she knows who comes up with such cheesy lines.
“Go away, Malfoy,” she moans tiredly. Isn’t it bad enough that she had just gotten groped by an overly amorous Frenchman?
As expected, he doesn’t do as she says and instead sits down right next to her on the steps. “Why are you sitting out here, Weasley?” He stretches his legs before him. “Did a date go wrong?”
She frowns. “I’m not in the mood for this,” she tells him, “I’d really prefer to be alone right now.”
“Don’t frown, darling,” he murmurs, “You’ll never know who might be falling in love with your smile.”
Rose shakes her head bemusedly at that and turns to look at him. Her eyes narrow suddenly. “Are you seriously still hitting on me whilst holding your date’s shoes?”
Scorpius grins sheepishly. “Would you believe me if I told you that these are my mother’s shoes?”
She snorts a laugh before she stands up and brushes the dust off her dress. “I’m leaving now. You best be going back to her.”
It isn’t until she reaches home that she realizes that meeting Scorpius was the best thing that has happened to her the whole night.
v.
She starts to tolerate him after that.
“So, darling,” Scorpius says cheerily as he waltzes into their office in Gringotts, “Apart from being sexy, what else do you do for a living?”
Rose just rolls her eyes. “I put up with cheesy pickup lines from this really annoying colleague and Gringotts pays me quite well for it.”
He laughs. “It sounds like a brilliant job. You are one very lucky witch. Any chance your job description includes going out for a drink with your annoying colleague?”
She shakes her head in amusement. “Better luck next time, Malfoy.”
vi.
“This might sound highly inappropriate, but something tells me I should give it a shot,” Scorpius starts as he sets a cup of coffee on her desk.
Rose looks up from a set of runes that she was trying to translate. “Hit me with your best, Malfoy.”
He grins and brushes lint off his robes. “You are like a bottle of Skele-Gro,” he pauses for dramatic effect, “you're growing me a bone.”
She chuckles. “Now you’re just growing desperate, Malfoy.”
“Will you go out for drinks with me?” He sits down at his desk and sighs deeply. “My love for you burns like a dying phoenix.”
Rose gives him a pointed look. “That one is just plain bad.”
He winces. “I know.”
vii.
“Are you using the Confundus charm or are you just naturally mind blowing?”
Rose pinches her lips together to stop a smile from escaping even as she palms the walls, searching for an exit to the cave they were currently trapped in. “This isn’t the time for pickup lines, Malfoy,” she whispers, “You might just set off something.”
Scorpius pointedly ignores her and continues, “Being without you is like being afflicted with the Cruciatus Curse.”
“Really, Malfoy, if you set off a trap while we are stuck here, I will murder you.” She tries to be stern but the corner of her lips curl up slightly.
He doesn’t stop; it’s not that she expects him to. “I’ve been whomping my willow thinking about you.”
She elbows him in the ribs but laughs anyway. “You are incorigi-”
There is mist before them and when it subsides, there is a doorway right before them.
“I am incorrigibly smart,” Scorpius finishes, sending a wink her way.
viii.
Rose is just about to wrap up for the day and go home for some well deserved rest when Scorpius plops onto her desk again. “Every time I hear your voice it reverberates within my soul,” he tells her with a heartfelt sigh. “I'm going to blazon my love for you all over town.”
“You are impossible,” is her quick reply.
He hops off her desk, still grinning. “Let’s go out and grab a drink?”
There is a long pause in which Rose actually considers the idea. “Yes,” she finally says and she sounds surprised, even to herself.
Scorpius’ jaw drops and his eyes are wide with shock. “I beg your pardon?” manages to find its way out of his throat.
She looks amused. “I said ‘yes’.”
“As in yes, you will go out for a drink with me?” Scorpius asks, still looking bewildered.
Rose rolls her eyes. “Yes, I will go out for a drink with you,” she clarifies, “Although, if you keep up with your questions-”
She doesn’t get to finish her sentence.
“No question, no problem!” he exclaims, clapping his hands together in glee.
Rose smiles at the joy on his face and thinks to herself that maybe she should have gone out with him a lot earlier.
ix.
The night after their first date, Scorpius goes home and starts planning their wedding.
It does come out as he planned. Not as soon as he would have liked, but it does happen and that is what counts, isn’t it?