The Fight
I confronted him.
I couldn't help it. He disappeared until 6:45 yesterday, didn't call me, had the phone turned off, and when he got back he claimed he had been at one of his mandatory meetings.
He never goes to his meetings at 5:30, he always goes at 8:00 when he goes in the evening. It was bullshit.
Basically he agreed that I had reason not to trust him given the situation between us. (him not being in love with me) He agreed not to talk to Carrie anymore, but stuck to his story about being at a meeting, which I still don't buy.
Then, I confronted him about why he is with me. Same old story there. He proposed a solution to that problem, which sounded more like an 'easy out' to me. He proposed he move back in at his place for a while, and then when he keeps seeing me that will prove to me that he is not, in fact, attempting to take advantage of the situation at all.
After a couple hours of disagreeing and discussing and some arguing, I passed out on the couch.
At 4:30 this morning I wake up. He had hidden the cell phone in his pocket and deleted ALL of the recent calls lists (missed, received, and dialed). He called someone last night, I just don't know who. I don't know if it was Carrie or Nark. I imagine he called Nark to give him hell. (Nark told me about Bryan calling Carrie secretively 5 times the other day). Either way, that bullshit of deleting the call history and hiding the phone was done intentionally to piss me off.
So I've done 1 of 2 things, I've either:
1) temporarily solved one of the major problems between me and Bryan, whose name is Carrie
or
2) I've taught him to be sneakier
I don't know. But I let him know I knew exactly what (I thought) he was trying to do with Carrie. I told him it appeared to me that Carrie was still niave in alot of ways and it appeared to me that Bryan was playing the "sweet and supportive guy friend" game with her and he was sneaking around behind my back to do it. Little bastard.
And of course, you know the drill, you've probably caught someone cheating before. According to him, everything was completely innocent. According to him, he was being sneaky b/c he knew how much it bothered me and he didn't want to deal with me being upset about his friendship with her. And of course, the usual "If it will make you feel better I'll stop talking to her" However, if that was his intention, and he cared that much about my feelings, then why did he sneak behind my back in the first place?? I mean I have to ask myself, is this really over, or is he just going to be sneakier? And I told him last night: time would tell.
Furthermore, he was acting as if he couldn't have female friends at all. I told him I knew exactly what he was doing with that head game too. I told him "Look, you're acting like you can't have any female friends. I'm not saying that. I have legitimate reasons to be upset about this shit with Carrie. I have cell phone bills to prove it."
He's been talking to Carrie quite a bit. He's just been using someone else's phone. At least that's what I think. Evidently she just had surgery on her bladder which I knew nothing about. That came out yesterday too, although it holds no relevance other than to prove that he is talking to her quite a bit.
And he was still mad this morning. And frankly, I'm still mad. and I'm thinking about taking him up on his offer to move out for a while. Because I'm so angry with the entire situation at this point that I can't even think clearly. I told him yesterday "You don't understand. I don't NEED this drama. I just got done with major drama (my divorce), I DON'T need or want drama in my life!"
I told him he was f*cking with the wrong head. I told him he was playing mind games. I told him he obviously didn't care about my feelings. He attempted to prove that he did.
The only thing of any actual merrit about this argument was that there was very little arguing or raised voices and alot of constructive conversation. I was a bit of roadblock there though. He wanted proposed solutions to the problem, I wanted to vent. However, I didn't do alot of venting. I just told him exactly how I felt and that I could see exactly what was going on and I did NOT appreciate it at all. Like I said, I told him I didn't need this shit and he picked the wrong person to play games with.
The phone number I found in his pocket was actually a female friend. And he proved that to me. That, I believe. That's about all I believe. I think I'm going to go get a guy's opinion on this situation...see what a good friend of mine thinks...
I couldn't help it. He disappeared until 6:45 yesterday, didn't call me, had the phone turned off, and when he got back he claimed he had been at one of his mandatory meetings.
He never goes to his meetings at 5:30, he always goes at 8:00 when he goes in the evening. It was bullshit.
Basically he agreed that I had reason not to trust him given the situation between us. (him not being in love with me) He agreed not to talk to Carrie anymore, but stuck to his story about being at a meeting, which I still don't buy.
Then, I confronted him about why he is with me. Same old story there. He proposed a solution to that problem, which sounded more like an 'easy out' to me. He proposed he move back in at his place for a while, and then when he keeps seeing me that will prove to me that he is not, in fact, attempting to take advantage of the situation at all.
After a couple hours of disagreeing and discussing and some arguing, I passed out on the couch.
At 4:30 this morning I wake up. He had hidden the cell phone in his pocket and deleted ALL of the recent calls lists (missed, received, and dialed). He called someone last night, I just don't know who. I don't know if it was Carrie or Nark. I imagine he called Nark to give him hell. (Nark told me about Bryan calling Carrie secretively 5 times the other day). Either way, that bullshit of deleting the call history and hiding the phone was done intentionally to piss me off.
So I've done 1 of 2 things, I've either:
1) temporarily solved one of the major problems between me and Bryan, whose name is Carrie
or
2) I've taught him to be sneakier
I don't know. But I let him know I knew exactly what (I thought) he was trying to do with Carrie. I told him it appeared to me that Carrie was still niave in alot of ways and it appeared to me that Bryan was playing the "sweet and supportive guy friend" game with her and he was sneaking around behind my back to do it. Little bastard.
And of course, you know the drill, you've probably caught someone cheating before. According to him, everything was completely innocent. According to him, he was being sneaky b/c he knew how much it bothered me and he didn't want to deal with me being upset about his friendship with her. And of course, the usual "If it will make you feel better I'll stop talking to her" However, if that was his intention, and he cared that much about my feelings, then why did he sneak behind my back in the first place?? I mean I have to ask myself, is this really over, or is he just going to be sneakier? And I told him last night: time would tell.
Furthermore, he was acting as if he couldn't have female friends at all. I told him I knew exactly what he was doing with that head game too. I told him "Look, you're acting like you can't have any female friends. I'm not saying that. I have legitimate reasons to be upset about this shit with Carrie. I have cell phone bills to prove it."
He's been talking to Carrie quite a bit. He's just been using someone else's phone. At least that's what I think. Evidently she just had surgery on her bladder which I knew nothing about. That came out yesterday too, although it holds no relevance other than to prove that he is talking to her quite a bit.
And he was still mad this morning. And frankly, I'm still mad. and I'm thinking about taking him up on his offer to move out for a while. Because I'm so angry with the entire situation at this point that I can't even think clearly. I told him yesterday "You don't understand. I don't NEED this drama. I just got done with major drama (my divorce), I DON'T need or want drama in my life!"
I told him he was f*cking with the wrong head. I told him he was playing mind games. I told him he obviously didn't care about my feelings. He attempted to prove that he did.
The only thing of any actual merrit about this argument was that there was very little arguing or raised voices and alot of constructive conversation. I was a bit of roadblock there though. He wanted proposed solutions to the problem, I wanted to vent. However, I didn't do alot of venting. I just told him exactly how I felt and that I could see exactly what was going on and I did NOT appreciate it at all. Like I said, I told him I didn't need this shit and he picked the wrong person to play games with.
The phone number I found in his pocket was actually a female friend. And he proved that to me. That, I believe. That's about all I believe. I think I'm going to go get a guy's opinion on this situation...see what a good friend of mine thinks...