The Unsent Letter
The Unsent Letter
I took your stuff to your Dad's. I think I got everything. You might want to get it soon though, in case it rains. I would have taken it inside but the door was locked.
I wish I could say I'm sorry, but I'm not. I need to be in a relationship where I feel safe. I need to know that the person that I am with cares about me and wants to be with me. At some point, I would like to be with someone who loves me. I need to be with someone who cares as much as about my happiness as I do about his. I am sorry for one thing: I am sorry that I let this go on for so long. I may have mislead you. Perhaps I gave you the impression that I would be satisfied just to be with you and that I didn't need anything else. For that, I do apologize. At first, that was my intention. I tried to just be with you and overlook the fact that you weren't in love with me and the fact that you don't want children. However, I didn't expect it to be this hard or that it would hurt this much. The longer I am with you the more evident it is that we do not want the same things from this relationship, and that hurts. The other day when I asked you to give me something to let me know that you were with me for the right reasons, you couldn't. This is not a punishment. This is me doing what I have to do for myself. You have to understand, I can't wait around to be left again. To stay with you under these circumstances is just asking to be emotionally mutilated again. I just got my life back together, hell I'm still working on it. Life is too short, and I don't want to waste another minute of it being unhappy or being with someone who doesn't really care for me the way I do them. I spent 7 years in a relationship like that, and I don't want to do it again. I don't blame you, this outcome is entirely on my shoulders. You told me from the beginning how you felt, and you told me all the reservations you had about us dating, and I didn't listen. You were right, and I'm sorry that I put us both through this. I've asked myself from the beginning if I backed you into a corner and made you feel obligated to do something you didn't want to do, and the longer we're together the more I can see that the answer to that question is yes. I wanted to be with you, but not like this. What I wanted was for the feelings to mutual. The feelings cannot be mutual. I can accept that. I don't hate you. Like I said, this one is my fault.
I hope everything works out for you and that you find everything you need to be happy.
Give Gino kisses for me.
I took your stuff to your Dad's. I think I got everything. You might want to get it soon though, in case it rains. I would have taken it inside but the door was locked.
I wish I could say I'm sorry, but I'm not. I need to be in a relationship where I feel safe. I need to know that the person that I am with cares about me and wants to be with me. At some point, I would like to be with someone who loves me. I need to be with someone who cares as much as about my happiness as I do about his. I am sorry for one thing: I am sorry that I let this go on for so long. I may have mislead you. Perhaps I gave you the impression that I would be satisfied just to be with you and that I didn't need anything else. For that, I do apologize. At first, that was my intention. I tried to just be with you and overlook the fact that you weren't in love with me and the fact that you don't want children. However, I didn't expect it to be this hard or that it would hurt this much. The longer I am with you the more evident it is that we do not want the same things from this relationship, and that hurts. The other day when I asked you to give me something to let me know that you were with me for the right reasons, you couldn't. This is not a punishment. This is me doing what I have to do for myself. You have to understand, I can't wait around to be left again. To stay with you under these circumstances is just asking to be emotionally mutilated again. I just got my life back together, hell I'm still working on it. Life is too short, and I don't want to waste another minute of it being unhappy or being with someone who doesn't really care for me the way I do them. I spent 7 years in a relationship like that, and I don't want to do it again. I don't blame you, this outcome is entirely on my shoulders. You told me from the beginning how you felt, and you told me all the reservations you had about us dating, and I didn't listen. You were right, and I'm sorry that I put us both through this. I've asked myself from the beginning if I backed you into a corner and made you feel obligated to do something you didn't want to do, and the longer we're together the more I can see that the answer to that question is yes. I wanted to be with you, but not like this. What I wanted was for the feelings to mutual. The feelings cannot be mutual. I can accept that. I don't hate you. Like I said, this one is my fault.
I hope everything works out for you and that you find everything you need to be happy.
Give Gino kisses for me.