Ok. This is going to be long...i can feel it!
It has been a crazy few weeks,hell, maybe even a month but it's been a good crazy...whatever that means. I went to Costa Rica at the beginning of the month, which was absolutely great by the way, and it's been a pretty good coast session at work. I guess since its still summer time, the attornies are still on vacay and not needing materials. I have also been watching a rack of movies and have been put on to the show Californication. So strap in folks, put your head back and enjoy the ride!
So first things first...Costa Rica!! It's a beautiful place, but because i'm me, there had to be issues. Maybe it's my luck, or maybe its just life making sure that i know that its life and that bullshit happens. Anyways, before we left I was just chillin at work and decided to do some research on stuff to do while in Costa Rica. Hours and hours went by, and my fascination with the country just kept growing and growing until I read on the hotel website that the resort we were staying in was 4 hours away from the airport we were flying into. I thought it was a mistake, but after more searching...it wasn't. SO blown. How the fuck is this place 4 hours away and they don't mention it in an itenerary or anything!! So that was fluke. We had to find transportation which was a whole other demon in itself.
Having a bus pick us up, take us to the hotel and do it again when we leave, was going to cost us around 400. A cab from the airport to the hotel would've been close to 500. So off break, im starting to sweat because how the fuck are we going to get to this lavish resort directly on the beach. We then thought about renting a car. Now, usually, i don't mind renting a car because i have an idea of driving conditions and im usually driving in America, so it's pretty much the same shit. But i've never driven in Costa Rica and after reading a bunch of websites on the dangers of it, it had me nervous. This was a week before we went, so you know once we got there, i was super nervous. Like i've said before...i can't help it. So we figure out what we're going to do, reserve the car and start getting more excited to go. And then, it was time...
First off, lemme say...that if you get a price that seems TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE...it always is. We got this trip relatively cheap and were boosted, but it also came with headaches. First, we had to fly to Atlanta and stay overnight. Usually this isn't a problem, but the airport was minus 16 degrees that night and Marcia and I pretty much froze to death. It was still an experience and for the most part, cool beans. The next day or plane leaves at 9 and we're finally on our way! We get to Costa Rica, have to stand in a customs line for about 40 mins then get our car. By the way, the Costa Rican airport wasn't big at all...so you know I was kinda shook cause I had no idea what to do or where to go. Thankfully, group theory works, and I just followed everyone that was on the plane with us. We get to the rental place and as im getting all the paperwork done for the car, they tell me that a bridge that connects two major parts of the country had sunk 10cm into the river and that it was closed. So what does that mean?? It means that a 4 hour drive has now turned into a 6.5 hour drive. FUCKIN BLOWER. Fortunately, renting a GPS system wasn't too expensive and they told me where to go and programmed it into the GPS. By the way, whoever invented that, genius.
We leave the rental place, headed for our wonderful trip in this wonderful and beautiful country, and then realize that Costa Rica is indeed a rain forest. It rained for roughly 5.5 hours. I was so nervous. The route given to us was through the mountains, around a volcano, through towns and little developments which all were on roads that weren't paved and had potholes that a little dog would've fit into. I felt like I was playing a video game because of all the shit i had to avoid. It didn't help either that there were wild horses, cows, dogs, sheep, people and other things sharing the road with us. We rented a Toyota Yaris, which was barely handling the road...and the people there drove buses, tractor-trailers, and farm equipment on these roads like it was nothing. They should really consider driving for NASCAR cause them niggas was drivin like shit.
So after a very convoluted drive and a concentration level i've never acheived, we made it. It was around 1030 at night, so we couldn't see anything, but most important...we made it. I finally had all of the tension sopped off of me, and I slept great. The next day, which by the way was strange, because i woke up to the sound of a bird that sounded just like a siren. My dumb ass thought it was a fire alarm or some shit. It was the most annoying noise EVER. The sound from Dumb and Dumber couldn't even fuck with this. Of course, naturally, this was happening around 6 am...so i didn't really get to sleep in as i would've liked, but c'mon...who sleeps in on vacation!! We woke up, looked outside and headed for the beach. It was a chill ass day just relaxing and enjoying each other when we decided to drive around and see some sights. Low and behold, get to the car, and one of the tires is flat. I was so mad that i almost passed out. It was hot as shit down there, and along with my anger, it was just too much. I'll hold you from the boring details, but we basically had to call the rental place, have them come out, go get the tire fixed and keep it movin. Well, that was all good and stuff, and the next day we had the same routine. Loud ass bird, swimming in the beach, going to see sights, but when we get outside the fucking tire is flat again. I am irate at this point. Call the rental place, and they say they're going to give me another car. So waiting for all this to happen, we decided to just stick around the hotel and chill. It was great. We met some cool ass people and got to walk around a little bit. Once I had the peace of mind that the rental place wasn't trying to fuck me, i eased up a little. Very hard for me to do, but i did it...very proud of myself indeed.
The next couple of days we finally get to do some activities and first was snorkeling. Anyone that knows me knows that I love the water and am pretty much a fish. (if anyone has jokes, go for it and I'll fire you up)...Anyways, we get on this lovely boat and head out 5 miles into the ocean to hit the spot. It was great to say the least. We start snorkeling and see a bunch of fish and just enjoying everything when our tour guide catches an octopuss. Now I have watched a lot of shows and stuff on this lovely creature, but never had the chance to go face-to-face with one. Lemme tell ya, they are the slimiest and grossest feeling thing ever. I wish i could describe it more, but if you ever come across an octopuss in the ocean, let it go on its way. After a while, we got tired and decided to head back to the boat for some eats (again, if you have jokes, i WILL fire you up) and to reflect on the snorkeling. It was at this point i realized that the sunblock that we used wasn't worth SHIT. I was basically cooked by the sun and was hating life afterwards. Got a pretty bad sunburn, but hey...i lived. When i lived in Hawaii i NEVER got burned, but i guess as i get older my skin is a tad more sensitive and i had to suffer. It was still cool tho, definitely fun.
The next day we went on a Canopy Tour. For those who don't know what that is, it's when you zip-line through the rain forest. If you don't know what zip-lining is, then...google it or something. The wire is about 90ft above the forest floor and its just you, the rock climbing gear and this tiny wire. Needless to say, i was very hesitant about this steel cable. I didn't think it could really hold my big ass, but it did, to my utter amazement. That whole thing was fucking cool. Zip-lining from platform to platform, seeing monkeys, flowers and plants that are only in the canopy was truly intriguing. It reminded me of all the discovery channel shows i've watched where they were doing research on life in the Canopy. Before i forget, as we were getting the safety lesson, in preparation for our journey through the brush, a wild fucking boar comes out of nowhere and starts licking and brushing up on Marcia's leg. It was absolutely funny, but kinda scary at the same time. It seemed to be a baby boar, so with that thought, mama boar wasn't too far away. I've seen how they act on wildlife shows and lemme tell ya, i was NOT looking forward to seeing mama boar come out and attack us all!
After zip-lining, we decided to go down this slide that went thru the rainforest. It was 450 meters and scary as shit. Matter of fact, going down that slide was the scariest shit i've ever done. First off, we have to walk up this hill that is just the longest hill ever. It never stopped! Get to the top where the slide started, get in and the water is 3 degrees. So off break everything shrunk. THEN, the slide was very narrow. Think of a gummy bear inside of a McDonald's straw...yea, exactly. So here's my big ass, tired as hell from the hill, squeezed into this tiny half-tube, and then having the question asked, "slow, medium, fast or super-fast?" HMMMM...I am usually a daredevil, but i decided to stick with medium. So this guy lifts this lever that is blocking the water from flowing and out rushes cold ass water and shoves me down this fucking slide. Never in my life have i screamed that loud and I was going so fast to that i thought i was going to come off the slide. I was fucking up my ankles, elbows, back, knees, pretty much everything in an effort to not fly out of this fucking slide when i get stuck. Yes, stuck. At this point, im fearing for my life cause im thinking someone is coming right behind me...but that thought quickly got erased cause a big ass gush of water came and pushed my big ass on down the slide. You end up in this large pool of ice cold water and have to get out and all that shit. Im sure getting hit by someone sliding down is not fun at all. So i went down again, this time the experience was much better, but after going up that hill and being in a humid ass rainforest, i gave up. Hell, i was hungry by then!
So we went to lunch and had some pretty good food. Matter of fact, it was the best food we had while in Costa Rica. Our group ate together and started to get to know each other more...it was very kumbaya-esque. Then we went horseback riding. I dont know if you know this, but i am terrified of horses. As a little scrap, i got thrown off of one and vowed to never get on one again. But in lieu of my vacation and Marcia telling me to suck it up, i got on one. This had to be the saddest horse i've ever seen. It was like me riding on a midget's back. I felt so sorry for him. Good thing was, he was pretty damn strong. They had us trekking through mud and rocks and gravel and shit and he was holding true. i named him feller because i've always wanted to name a horse that...corny yes, but fuck it, i had fun.
To finish up the tour, we went to hot springs that were supposedly heated by the volcano. I say supposed, because it just didn't seem like it would work and also, i saw big generators near the steam room so i figured it all worked on this system. I am not too good at hot water either, but i tried it. I couldn't stand the uber hot pool, but the one that felt lukewarm was great. On my sunburn it felt magnificent. We also took mudbaths, which also helped my sunburn. All-in-all, great tour. I'd definitely do it again, sans that long ass slide. After washing up, grabbing a bottle of water, we head back to the hotel. I have left out a critical part of this whole trip...the drivers in Costa Rica are straight maniacs. Going 65 on a dirt road, in a tour bus, that's as narrow as a service road here in America is fucking insane. We made it, that's all that matters.
Amazing trip, glad i got to do something like that. I hope this just opens doors for me to go other places in the near future. World...here i COME!!
Now...I was going to talk about other shit like movies and my impression of Californication...but I'll save that for later. I think i've tortured you enough. That is, if you decide to read this all the way through, if you do...i commend you. If not, fuck you! (just kidding of course!!)
Quote time:
"It is only in adventure that some people succeed in knowing themselves - in finding themselves." - Andre Gide (1869 - 1951)
yep...sums that up nicely.
So first things first...Costa Rica!! It's a beautiful place, but because i'm me, there had to be issues. Maybe it's my luck, or maybe its just life making sure that i know that its life and that bullshit happens. Anyways, before we left I was just chillin at work and decided to do some research on stuff to do while in Costa Rica. Hours and hours went by, and my fascination with the country just kept growing and growing until I read on the hotel website that the resort we were staying in was 4 hours away from the airport we were flying into. I thought it was a mistake, but after more searching...it wasn't. SO blown. How the fuck is this place 4 hours away and they don't mention it in an itenerary or anything!! So that was fluke. We had to find transportation which was a whole other demon in itself.
Having a bus pick us up, take us to the hotel and do it again when we leave, was going to cost us around 400. A cab from the airport to the hotel would've been close to 500. So off break, im starting to sweat because how the fuck are we going to get to this lavish resort directly on the beach. We then thought about renting a car. Now, usually, i don't mind renting a car because i have an idea of driving conditions and im usually driving in America, so it's pretty much the same shit. But i've never driven in Costa Rica and after reading a bunch of websites on the dangers of it, it had me nervous. This was a week before we went, so you know once we got there, i was super nervous. Like i've said before...i can't help it. So we figure out what we're going to do, reserve the car and start getting more excited to go. And then, it was time...
First off, lemme say...that if you get a price that seems TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE...it always is. We got this trip relatively cheap and were boosted, but it also came with headaches. First, we had to fly to Atlanta and stay overnight. Usually this isn't a problem, but the airport was minus 16 degrees that night and Marcia and I pretty much froze to death. It was still an experience and for the most part, cool beans. The next day or plane leaves at 9 and we're finally on our way! We get to Costa Rica, have to stand in a customs line for about 40 mins then get our car. By the way, the Costa Rican airport wasn't big at all...so you know I was kinda shook cause I had no idea what to do or where to go. Thankfully, group theory works, and I just followed everyone that was on the plane with us. We get to the rental place and as im getting all the paperwork done for the car, they tell me that a bridge that connects two major parts of the country had sunk 10cm into the river and that it was closed. So what does that mean?? It means that a 4 hour drive has now turned into a 6.5 hour drive. FUCKIN BLOWER. Fortunately, renting a GPS system wasn't too expensive and they told me where to go and programmed it into the GPS. By the way, whoever invented that, genius.
We leave the rental place, headed for our wonderful trip in this wonderful and beautiful country, and then realize that Costa Rica is indeed a rain forest. It rained for roughly 5.5 hours. I was so nervous. The route given to us was through the mountains, around a volcano, through towns and little developments which all were on roads that weren't paved and had potholes that a little dog would've fit into. I felt like I was playing a video game because of all the shit i had to avoid. It didn't help either that there were wild horses, cows, dogs, sheep, people and other things sharing the road with us. We rented a Toyota Yaris, which was barely handling the road...and the people there drove buses, tractor-trailers, and farm equipment on these roads like it was nothing. They should really consider driving for NASCAR cause them niggas was drivin like shit.
So after a very convoluted drive and a concentration level i've never acheived, we made it. It was around 1030 at night, so we couldn't see anything, but most important...we made it. I finally had all of the tension sopped off of me, and I slept great. The next day, which by the way was strange, because i woke up to the sound of a bird that sounded just like a siren. My dumb ass thought it was a fire alarm or some shit. It was the most annoying noise EVER. The sound from Dumb and Dumber couldn't even fuck with this. Of course, naturally, this was happening around 6 am...so i didn't really get to sleep in as i would've liked, but c'mon...who sleeps in on vacation!! We woke up, looked outside and headed for the beach. It was a chill ass day just relaxing and enjoying each other when we decided to drive around and see some sights. Low and behold, get to the car, and one of the tires is flat. I was so mad that i almost passed out. It was hot as shit down there, and along with my anger, it was just too much. I'll hold you from the boring details, but we basically had to call the rental place, have them come out, go get the tire fixed and keep it movin. Well, that was all good and stuff, and the next day we had the same routine. Loud ass bird, swimming in the beach, going to see sights, but when we get outside the fucking tire is flat again. I am irate at this point. Call the rental place, and they say they're going to give me another car. So waiting for all this to happen, we decided to just stick around the hotel and chill. It was great. We met some cool ass people and got to walk around a little bit. Once I had the peace of mind that the rental place wasn't trying to fuck me, i eased up a little. Very hard for me to do, but i did it...very proud of myself indeed.
The next couple of days we finally get to do some activities and first was snorkeling. Anyone that knows me knows that I love the water and am pretty much a fish. (if anyone has jokes, go for it and I'll fire you up)...Anyways, we get on this lovely boat and head out 5 miles into the ocean to hit the spot. It was great to say the least. We start snorkeling and see a bunch of fish and just enjoying everything when our tour guide catches an octopuss. Now I have watched a lot of shows and stuff on this lovely creature, but never had the chance to go face-to-face with one. Lemme tell ya, they are the slimiest and grossest feeling thing ever. I wish i could describe it more, but if you ever come across an octopuss in the ocean, let it go on its way. After a while, we got tired and decided to head back to the boat for some eats (again, if you have jokes, i WILL fire you up) and to reflect on the snorkeling. It was at this point i realized that the sunblock that we used wasn't worth SHIT. I was basically cooked by the sun and was hating life afterwards. Got a pretty bad sunburn, but hey...i lived. When i lived in Hawaii i NEVER got burned, but i guess as i get older my skin is a tad more sensitive and i had to suffer. It was still cool tho, definitely fun.
The next day we went on a Canopy Tour. For those who don't know what that is, it's when you zip-line through the rain forest. If you don't know what zip-lining is, then...google it or something. The wire is about 90ft above the forest floor and its just you, the rock climbing gear and this tiny wire. Needless to say, i was very hesitant about this steel cable. I didn't think it could really hold my big ass, but it did, to my utter amazement. That whole thing was fucking cool. Zip-lining from platform to platform, seeing monkeys, flowers and plants that are only in the canopy was truly intriguing. It reminded me of all the discovery channel shows i've watched where they were doing research on life in the Canopy. Before i forget, as we were getting the safety lesson, in preparation for our journey through the brush, a wild fucking boar comes out of nowhere and starts licking and brushing up on Marcia's leg. It was absolutely funny, but kinda scary at the same time. It seemed to be a baby boar, so with that thought, mama boar wasn't too far away. I've seen how they act on wildlife shows and lemme tell ya, i was NOT looking forward to seeing mama boar come out and attack us all!
After zip-lining, we decided to go down this slide that went thru the rainforest. It was 450 meters and scary as shit. Matter of fact, going down that slide was the scariest shit i've ever done. First off, we have to walk up this hill that is just the longest hill ever. It never stopped! Get to the top where the slide started, get in and the water is 3 degrees. So off break everything shrunk. THEN, the slide was very narrow. Think of a gummy bear inside of a McDonald's straw...yea, exactly. So here's my big ass, tired as hell from the hill, squeezed into this tiny half-tube, and then having the question asked, "slow, medium, fast or super-fast?" HMMMM...I am usually a daredevil, but i decided to stick with medium. So this guy lifts this lever that is blocking the water from flowing and out rushes cold ass water and shoves me down this fucking slide. Never in my life have i screamed that loud and I was going so fast to that i thought i was going to come off the slide. I was fucking up my ankles, elbows, back, knees, pretty much everything in an effort to not fly out of this fucking slide when i get stuck. Yes, stuck. At this point, im fearing for my life cause im thinking someone is coming right behind me...but that thought quickly got erased cause a big ass gush of water came and pushed my big ass on down the slide. You end up in this large pool of ice cold water and have to get out and all that shit. Im sure getting hit by someone sliding down is not fun at all. So i went down again, this time the experience was much better, but after going up that hill and being in a humid ass rainforest, i gave up. Hell, i was hungry by then!
So we went to lunch and had some pretty good food. Matter of fact, it was the best food we had while in Costa Rica. Our group ate together and started to get to know each other more...it was very kumbaya-esque. Then we went horseback riding. I dont know if you know this, but i am terrified of horses. As a little scrap, i got thrown off of one and vowed to never get on one again. But in lieu of my vacation and Marcia telling me to suck it up, i got on one. This had to be the saddest horse i've ever seen. It was like me riding on a midget's back. I felt so sorry for him. Good thing was, he was pretty damn strong. They had us trekking through mud and rocks and gravel and shit and he was holding true. i named him feller because i've always wanted to name a horse that...corny yes, but fuck it, i had fun.
To finish up the tour, we went to hot springs that were supposedly heated by the volcano. I say supposed, because it just didn't seem like it would work and also, i saw big generators near the steam room so i figured it all worked on this system. I am not too good at hot water either, but i tried it. I couldn't stand the uber hot pool, but the one that felt lukewarm was great. On my sunburn it felt magnificent. We also took mudbaths, which also helped my sunburn. All-in-all, great tour. I'd definitely do it again, sans that long ass slide. After washing up, grabbing a bottle of water, we head back to the hotel. I have left out a critical part of this whole trip...the drivers in Costa Rica are straight maniacs. Going 65 on a dirt road, in a tour bus, that's as narrow as a service road here in America is fucking insane. We made it, that's all that matters.
Amazing trip, glad i got to do something like that. I hope this just opens doors for me to go other places in the near future. World...here i COME!!
Now...I was going to talk about other shit like movies and my impression of Californication...but I'll save that for later. I think i've tortured you enough. That is, if you decide to read this all the way through, if you do...i commend you. If not, fuck you! (just kidding of course!!)
Quote time:
"It is only in adventure that some people succeed in knowing themselves - in finding themselves." - Andre Gide (1869 - 1951)
yep...sums that up nicely.