"A reality backlash is jimmity cricket with a chainsaw"
Everyone lives the same damn life.
We grow up and life is shit, there is no happy old person. they are just drugged up. i dont ever want to be old, because by then im too jaded to care about anything, and too old to do anything good
Dying is not my wish, but living in a world as mundane and ordinary as this one is not what i want either.
I want to live in a fantasy world. A fucked up utopia where everything goes my way.
I am so fucking lucky, i got 3 girls i wanted to want me but now i only like one of them (the hardest one to be with) and the other two are so fucked up because of me. You can say its their fault for not having control over their emotions or whatever
but you are fucking wrong.
If something goes my way, the rest of the scenerio fails miserably.
I dont want to goto school to get a good job.
WHY do i want a good job? so i can have a family and kids, and live the life of my parents? and everyone else
Do i want to live like a child without a care in the world? fuck no
People envy a child's careless freedom in their ignorance, but who wants to not experience love, not experience the freedom to drive 30 minutes away because you are hungry for Pancheros. No one wants to give up what they have.
But we all make sacrifices, one after another until we are all unhappy 35 year olds trying to live life through our kids or something retarded like that
I have a feeling of dread because i turn 20 this april, my teen years will be over and i have never been to college.
Why do i feel this way? is it going to hurt me? no, thats just the ordinary thing to do and i am not doing it on time. why do i need money to be happy?
Money doens't buy happiness, fuck that. if i had the money Bill Gates has i would be happier than a whore with a sack full of dicks. so would you.
Is that what im going to try and get, no. its impossible for me, and all i want to do is fall in love again. it will end horribly again, then i will try again.
nothing falls into place, and i hate reality.
Everyday i spend so much time daydreaming about magnifiscent things, things that will never, ever happen because it breaks every law of physics we know.
I wish i was so many things, but im stuck being me and i dont even feel like im myself anymore.
Everyday i feel like someone else, a year ago i would of laughed my ass off if you told me i would bitch about how much reality blows on an internet post board.
This is a release of the shit that builds up in our brains and it feels good to broadcast it. Even if no one in this community knows anything about me.
Things aren't good, things will never be better. Things will just be plain and ordinary and thats the worst thing that can happen.
i see so many unique people and i feel so different from them because i lack something they have. a spark of life perhaps
Why are we forced into only 1 way to live our life. the american dream, make money, make love, make a family, die. wow, i must be a goddamn terrorist for not wanting this shit.
That brings me to the next point, what are all the victems of the infamous 9-11 attack? they are all martyrs, they died so the rest of the country (who USED to bitch about how much america sucks) can start loving it and being patriotic becuase they sport american flags everywhere.
someone PLEASE explain to me how the fuck a damn flag helps this country?!!?! we are not at a football game showing our colors to help the players feel good. america isn't at war, its fucking pissed off and going around killing people. The united states of america is a serial killer with no agenda.
fuck that.
and whats my problem? in the last year, i can only think of one single time where i was pissed off, truely pissed off. and yet here i am bitching like im an angry kid when im more of a pacifist pussy living in a sheltar made of peace...... piece of shit to be accurate
Everyday i become lesser, 5 years ago this would have been longer, more meaningful, and using larger words. i no longer have mental capacity for such literary displays of aggression.
This sucks, so does everything else. the only thing good around here are the people in it. i hate it when people say "i hate everyone" because i dont. i love people and their opinions and their problems and their triumphs. its the only reason why i leave my house.
I just wish cigarettes could give me cancer faster because i dont want to ever live past 28. i dont want to have to watch my weight, i dont want to look any uglier, hell, i already am ugly. i haven't had a random girl hit on me since last spring. and she was drunk. i dont want to have progeney, i dont want a house in the suburbs. (oh no, im another person whining about suburbia and our middle class lives which is so fucking awesome compared to the poor, and people who live in other countries)
one more thing, magnolia IS a great fucking movie. it makes sense, it isn't that fucked up. well it is, but it has meaning but not as much as you think. its a great fucking movie, i like movies with sad endings. this one doesn't have a sad ending, the whole thing is sad, but it doesn't have a happy ending either. it just ends, just like everything else. it just does.
We grow up and life is shit, there is no happy old person. they are just drugged up. i dont ever want to be old, because by then im too jaded to care about anything, and too old to do anything good
Dying is not my wish, but living in a world as mundane and ordinary as this one is not what i want either.
I want to live in a fantasy world. A fucked up utopia where everything goes my way.
I am so fucking lucky, i got 3 girls i wanted to want me but now i only like one of them (the hardest one to be with) and the other two are so fucked up because of me. You can say its their fault for not having control over their emotions or whatever
but you are fucking wrong.
If something goes my way, the rest of the scenerio fails miserably.
I dont want to goto school to get a good job.
WHY do i want a good job? so i can have a family and kids, and live the life of my parents? and everyone else
Do i want to live like a child without a care in the world? fuck no
People envy a child's careless freedom in their ignorance, but who wants to not experience love, not experience the freedom to drive 30 minutes away because you are hungry for Pancheros. No one wants to give up what they have.
But we all make sacrifices, one after another until we are all unhappy 35 year olds trying to live life through our kids or something retarded like that
I have a feeling of dread because i turn 20 this april, my teen years will be over and i have never been to college.
Why do i feel this way? is it going to hurt me? no, thats just the ordinary thing to do and i am not doing it on time. why do i need money to be happy?
Money doens't buy happiness, fuck that. if i had the money Bill Gates has i would be happier than a whore with a sack full of dicks. so would you.
Is that what im going to try and get, no. its impossible for me, and all i want to do is fall in love again. it will end horribly again, then i will try again.
nothing falls into place, and i hate reality.
Everyday i spend so much time daydreaming about magnifiscent things, things that will never, ever happen because it breaks every law of physics we know.
I wish i was so many things, but im stuck being me and i dont even feel like im myself anymore.
Everyday i feel like someone else, a year ago i would of laughed my ass off if you told me i would bitch about how much reality blows on an internet post board.
This is a release of the shit that builds up in our brains and it feels good to broadcast it. Even if no one in this community knows anything about me.
Things aren't good, things will never be better. Things will just be plain and ordinary and thats the worst thing that can happen.
i see so many unique people and i feel so different from them because i lack something they have. a spark of life perhaps
Why are we forced into only 1 way to live our life. the american dream, make money, make love, make a family, die. wow, i must be a goddamn terrorist for not wanting this shit.
That brings me to the next point, what are all the victems of the infamous 9-11 attack? they are all martyrs, they died so the rest of the country (who USED to bitch about how much america sucks) can start loving it and being patriotic becuase they sport american flags everywhere.
someone PLEASE explain to me how the fuck a damn flag helps this country?!!?! we are not at a football game showing our colors to help the players feel good. america isn't at war, its fucking pissed off and going around killing people. The united states of america is a serial killer with no agenda.
fuck that.
and whats my problem? in the last year, i can only think of one single time where i was pissed off, truely pissed off. and yet here i am bitching like im an angry kid when im more of a pacifist pussy living in a sheltar made of peace...... piece of shit to be accurate
Everyday i become lesser, 5 years ago this would have been longer, more meaningful, and using larger words. i no longer have mental capacity for such literary displays of aggression.
This sucks, so does everything else. the only thing good around here are the people in it. i hate it when people say "i hate everyone" because i dont. i love people and their opinions and their problems and their triumphs. its the only reason why i leave my house.
I just wish cigarettes could give me cancer faster because i dont want to ever live past 28. i dont want to have to watch my weight, i dont want to look any uglier, hell, i already am ugly. i haven't had a random girl hit on me since last spring. and she was drunk. i dont want to have progeney, i dont want a house in the suburbs. (oh no, im another person whining about suburbia and our middle class lives which is so fucking awesome compared to the poor, and people who live in other countries)
one more thing, magnolia IS a great fucking movie. it makes sense, it isn't that fucked up. well it is, but it has meaning but not as much as you think. its a great fucking movie, i like movies with sad endings. this one doesn't have a sad ending, the whole thing is sad, but it doesn't have a happy ending either. it just ends, just like everything else. it just does.