(no subject)
Wow. The social inadequacy I experienced last night just blew.
I've never fit into a cast so poorly. Like, if it wasn't for Kim, I'd honestly lose my mind. Nate talks to me out of simpathy, thats about it.
I just keep trying to tell myself that even though I'm alone there it doesn't mean I don't have friends. I know that should be obvious, but like, I get soooo down on myself when I'm there. I really can't wait for this show to just be over and done with. Forever.
~~~~~
I hate being the crazy one. It blows. Because I feel like everything I do is being judged under the "Smo's insane" mentality. I just hope some day I can meet someone who can see past my insanity and see me. I really don't try to hurt people. I don't try to be a bad person. I wish I would be forgiven for my mistakes and seen the way I used to be.
I would do anything for a time machine.
I've never fit into a cast so poorly. Like, if it wasn't for Kim, I'd honestly lose my mind. Nate talks to me out of simpathy, thats about it.
I just keep trying to tell myself that even though I'm alone there it doesn't mean I don't have friends. I know that should be obvious, but like, I get soooo down on myself when I'm there. I really can't wait for this show to just be over and done with. Forever.
~~~~~
I hate being the crazy one. It blows. Because I feel like everything I do is being judged under the "Smo's insane" mentality. I just hope some day I can meet someone who can see past my insanity and see me. I really don't try to hurt people. I don't try to be a bad person. I wish I would be forgiven for my mistakes and seen the way I used to be.
I would do anything for a time machine.