sigh
>emo<
It was over some time ago, I just didn't let it sink in.
I never had the love I thought I did, did I?
I seem perpetually surprised at my ability to delude myself, one would think i'd grow past that eventually. Love is a strange beast, single handed-ly the one thing responsible for both the most joy, and pain in my life. I doubt I'll ever tame it, especially at this rate...
In my life I've been abused, used, conned and duped. I used to think I was the nice guy, the sweet one. Really I'm just too timid to follow my own needs or wants, too weak to discern for myself what was best. Too eager to curry favor all around, despite the detriments incurred to my own body and mind.
And the sad thing about this? Even recognizing it all won't change anything - I will keep my friends or lose them as I always have, I will stumble through life haphazardly - it's all I know. It's all I can do to care about people in my own way, despite the trouble it causes.
>end emo
It was over some time ago, I just didn't let it sink in.
I never had the love I thought I did, did I?
I seem perpetually surprised at my ability to delude myself, one would think i'd grow past that eventually. Love is a strange beast, single handed-ly the one thing responsible for both the most joy, and pain in my life. I doubt I'll ever tame it, especially at this rate...
In my life I've been abused, used, conned and duped. I used to think I was the nice guy, the sweet one. Really I'm just too timid to follow my own needs or wants, too weak to discern for myself what was best. Too eager to curry favor all around, despite the detriments incurred to my own body and mind.
And the sad thing about this? Even recognizing it all won't change anything - I will keep my friends or lose them as I always have, I will stumble through life haphazardly - it's all I know. It's all I can do to care about people in my own way, despite the trouble it causes.
>end emo