A load of bullshit, or Be nice
America. Ahh! How do people deal with this strange land? Such a different group of pretensions. AHH. I think a primal scream is the only to express... well, anything. Which is an absolute lie. A lie that means I think at this moment that anything less than a scream means nothing.
I guess I'm just in a destructive mood. Which I really can't separate from constructive moods. Moods. A mood. Are there different moods? I think it's all the same mood. Silly language. Silly ideas. Maybe a mood is just something to hide in when you don't want to be in anything else.
So: today's mission: find meaning in a movie and a play while hanging out with my poor grandpa.
Ani keeps repeating "Be nice."
Good advice. What else is there? Should just call that mood thing "Be nice." Not a new idea. Just a nice one.
Talk about paranoia of the destructive effect your mind can have on others. Christ.
I'm so sorry I'm so stupid sometimes. I think Apologies are a really nice part of that mood thing. I miss so many things. Is that destructive? What a funny mood when everything, every wordimagesymbol is a metaphor for LIFE! "I figured out life! It's a Tree!" "It's a question mark!" "It's a scream!" I guess sorry is just a symbol that falls short of expressing this 5 minutes of the mood--my subjective and transient perception of the eternal wow.
But I really feel it now. The sorry.
In other news: I will see mountains in 4 days. I will ski with my dad. I will sleep with my cat. I'll be able to put eye contact to all those people things that I love. I miss you guys. I'll finally have some clean clothes. And people won't put me in a funny box for baking bread.
Is feeling continuously more and more honest a sign of something good? If you feel honest, are you? Or is that a surefire sign that you're getting further and further from something ACTUALLY TRUE?
Question mark question mark questionmark.
Tree tree tree.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
p.s. Everything. You know?
I guess I'm just in a destructive mood. Which I really can't separate from constructive moods. Moods. A mood. Are there different moods? I think it's all the same mood. Silly language. Silly ideas. Maybe a mood is just something to hide in when you don't want to be in anything else.
So: today's mission: find meaning in a movie and a play while hanging out with my poor grandpa.
Ani keeps repeating "Be nice."
Good advice. What else is there? Should just call that mood thing "Be nice." Not a new idea. Just a nice one.
Talk about paranoia of the destructive effect your mind can have on others. Christ.
I'm so sorry I'm so stupid sometimes. I think Apologies are a really nice part of that mood thing. I miss so many things. Is that destructive? What a funny mood when everything, every wordimagesymbol is a metaphor for LIFE! "I figured out life! It's a Tree!" "It's a question mark!" "It's a scream!" I guess sorry is just a symbol that falls short of expressing this 5 minutes of the mood--my subjective and transient perception of the eternal wow.
But I really feel it now. The sorry.
In other news: I will see mountains in 4 days. I will ski with my dad. I will sleep with my cat. I'll be able to put eye contact to all those people things that I love. I miss you guys. I'll finally have some clean clothes. And people won't put me in a funny box for baking bread.
Is feeling continuously more and more honest a sign of something good? If you feel honest, are you? Or is that a surefire sign that you're getting further and further from something ACTUALLY TRUE?
Question mark question mark questionmark.
Tree tree tree.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
p.s. Everything. You know?