Blah... what the fuck is wrong with me?
I have a current problem.... it seems to have gained strenghth last night. I start to cry, for no reason really. Well I think about certain things and then BOOM I am tearing up. It's weird.... my mood is weird. I am crying now! What in the hell is my problem. I don't like this, its not me! I don't want this to happen to me... SOMEONE MAKE IT STOP! Please! Ollie is still making things hard for me... I don't like it one bit! I should have never went to Iowa, because I knew my feelings would get all weird when I returned. Oh look THEY DID! FUCK I should have figured short, fat, and boring wouldn't get me anywhere. I have no no no idea what I am going through. Am I falling into a depression? i hope not.... its not me! I should not be the one who is depressed. Its me... Karissa! Happy... smiley... cheery... Positive! THAT IS ME KARISSA HAS TO BE THOSE THINGS! NO ifs ands or buts about it. I knew if I went down to Iowa I would like Kenny... I knew it from the beginning! (Who is currently "not over his ex-girlfriend) i fall for guys so fast! WAY WAY WAY too fast. If a guy is nice to me... I am interested. GOD! AAAHHH!!! I want to scream at the situations I put myself in. i should be studying for two HUGE tests that I have tomorrow. But I am not.. because I love failing classes or something. I have no motivation for school. You'd think I would learn, but I don't... ever! Don't get me wrong... this weekend was a lot of fun! I meet some new people that I will def. not forget. Hell I even made money. Money makes everyone happy, right? Whatever... I need a good slap in the face with some Common Sense, which I obviously do not have. I would rant more... but I am sure everyone has stopped reading this long long ago. So I'm finished.