(no subject)
I keep trying to look at things positively and i try to get all excited about things but can't. I've been trying to somewhat trick my mind into being happy. The only way i can smile is if i'm doing something that makes me forget everything. The boat used to be my escape but that's been ruined for me forever. The Funeral yesterday made me think about so much that I just wanted to escape. I need to escape my life for awhile. I can't will myself happy.