Entry 02

[smellsyourhair]

There are these strange slime-like creatures bouncing around here and there. They look like they're makde out of slime, or perhaps an ooze of some sort.

I'll call them slimes.

[Edward sounds very proud of this idea and he leans back, sipping a cup of the blood he got from the cooler in Sergei's Bar and Grille.]

Comments

[farfairersoul]

Oh yes, that is brilliantly original. Well done.

[The translation ("You are such an idiot.") is obvious in his voice.]

[smellsyourhair]

[Well, TOO BAD FOR YOU, RAZER, because Edward isn't the sharpest tool in the shed and he doesn't notice! Kinda. His sharp vampire ears with their exquisite sense of hearing are telling him that Razer may not have been wholly sincere in his praise.

Hmmm, this is a problem. Eddy will have to think on this.]

... it's functional.

[farfairersoul]

It is moronic.

[smellsyourhair]

It's perfect.

[ B| ]

[farfairersoul]

They say ignorance is bliss, but I'm afraid I must shatter your wonderment and happiness to make you aware that, no, it is not "perfect." It is childish, redundant, obvious and stupid.

And you, if you are the sort that believes such things to be "perfect," are either mentally handicapped or simply an insufferable moron.

[Razer chuckles once.]

But then, I suppose I should not have expected any less from a newly-arrived roundear.

[smellsyourhair]

So what's your term that you've made up? Because I hear people calling them slimes.

[ >B3 ]

[farfairersoul]

I am fairly certain they already have a name of their own, if they are on this ship. My people have a name when our own planet does not.

[Snerk.]

Why not simply ask one?

[smellsyourhair]

Because they don't talk.

[farfairersoul]

Simply because they do not speak does not mean they do not communicate. Lurkers did not learn to speak in a discernible language until the last century or so, their race still has a name. They, individually, still have names.

They do not seem to be very intelligent, but your assumption that you have a right to name another species when they are clearly at least moderately self-aware, simply because you are incapable of understanding them, proves your idiocy more than theirs.

[He doesn't believe half this crap but it sure sounds smart, doesn't it?]

[smellsyourhair]

... huh.

[Edward takes this stuff pretty seriously, since he's a 'vegetarian' vampire and doesn't kill sentient beings.]

[farfairersoul]

Thinking about the situation in its entirety changes your opinion quite a lot, hm?

[Oh Edward why are you so dumb.]

[smellsyourhair]

[Because the series of books that he comes from basically depend on every character holding the Idiot Ball for the asinine plots to carry forth, that's why. The end result, however, is that Edward Cullen is an eternal seventeen year old, and not a terribly clever one at that.]

It does. I see. Huh.

[His brow crinkles, and the pensive look makes him appear tragically handsome.]