(no subject)
The Dark Knight Rises was not the movie that I wanted. Because it strayed so far from what I was hoping for it, I don't know how valid some of my criticisms are. So here are the things that bothered me. Did they bother you too?
BATMAN: I wanted to see Batman righting some wrongs, kicking some ass, and generally being awesome. Instead, there was Batman getting his head repeatedly dunked in the toilet. Also, let me see if I've got this right. Bruce Wayne is permanently injured, requiring a cane to even stand upright. He fixes this by putting on a brace to support his leg. This brace then magically heals his entire body and becomes totally unnecessary, explaining why a man with a newly-healed spine, zero cartilage in his elbows and knees, and that permanent leg injury that keeps him virtually immobile is able to climb a prison pit wall and escape in a manner that only one other person alive has managed to do.
CATWOMAN: I thought Catwoman was pretty awesome.
TALIA: Called her the moment that she said her name was Miranda Tate. I based this at first on her last name, which is remarkably similar to the French for head (tete). Miranda Head, eh? Scheming to get close to Bruce Wayne (or at least his business)? Aside from that, way to steal Bane's backstory, lady. (Though her rabidly fanatical devotion to Ra's was pretty awesome.)
BANE: Bane's voice sounded extremely chipper to me, all the time. He was so happy! I've heard it described as a grandpa voice, and that's pretty accurate.
GORDON: Pretty awesome as well.
BLAKE: Good right up to the end of the movie, where he turned into something horribly ridiculous. Except for the bit where he knew that Bruce Wayne was Batman because he had a funny look on his face. Really? REALLY? If that kid's able to find out things like that just from a brief look at someone, he should be working with the cops as a psychic detective. (Then again, Batman seems to enjoy telling everyone who he is, so maybe word's gotten around.)
In the context of a "the world is horrible, the hero survives and gets a happy ending" movie, it was okay. But that's not what I wanted. Batman is eternal. Batman doesn't retire to Europe with Catwoman. Batman doesn't get a happy ending. Batman doesn't get an ending, period. Batman is a psychologically scarred weirdo in a mask that has an unhealthy attachment to his city and believes that only he (and occasionally his sidekicks) can save it. He stops evil by outsmarting and outfighting it. He doesn't fake his death and disappear. How cowardly. How unheroic.
BATMAN: I wanted to see Batman righting some wrongs, kicking some ass, and generally being awesome. Instead, there was Batman getting his head repeatedly dunked in the toilet. Also, let me see if I've got this right. Bruce Wayne is permanently injured, requiring a cane to even stand upright. He fixes this by putting on a brace to support his leg. This brace then magically heals his entire body and becomes totally unnecessary, explaining why a man with a newly-healed spine, zero cartilage in his elbows and knees, and that permanent leg injury that keeps him virtually immobile is able to climb a prison pit wall and escape in a manner that only one other person alive has managed to do.
CATWOMAN: I thought Catwoman was pretty awesome.
TALIA: Called her the moment that she said her name was Miranda Tate. I based this at first on her last name, which is remarkably similar to the French for head (tete). Miranda Head, eh? Scheming to get close to Bruce Wayne (or at least his business)? Aside from that, way to steal Bane's backstory, lady. (Though her rabidly fanatical devotion to Ra's was pretty awesome.)
BANE: Bane's voice sounded extremely chipper to me, all the time. He was so happy! I've heard it described as a grandpa voice, and that's pretty accurate.
GORDON: Pretty awesome as well.
BLAKE: Good right up to the end of the movie, where he turned into something horribly ridiculous. Except for the bit where he knew that Bruce Wayne was Batman because he had a funny look on his face. Really? REALLY? If that kid's able to find out things like that just from a brief look at someone, he should be working with the cops as a psychic detective. (Then again, Batman seems to enjoy telling everyone who he is, so maybe word's gotten around.)
In the context of a "the world is horrible, the hero survives and gets a happy ending" movie, it was okay. But that's not what I wanted. Batman is eternal. Batman doesn't retire to Europe with Catwoman. Batman doesn't get a happy ending. Batman doesn't get an ending, period. Batman is a psychologically scarred weirdo in a mask that has an unhealthy attachment to his city and believes that only he (and occasionally his sidekicks) can save it. He stops evil by outsmarting and outfighting it. He doesn't fake his death and disappear. How cowardly. How unheroic.