Greg Giraldo Takes on Bitches
I am gonna to post my favoritest comedic material of the year-- from Greg Giraldo in "Dave Attell's Insomniac Tour"
Bitches are the best women in the world. Now I don't know if you watch a lot of hip-hop videos, but, man bitches are the shit!
Bitches are so much better than regular women. They are way cooler than wives or girlfriends. What we want is just to get a bunch of bitches to have with us. Cause bitches are fucking awesome! They're always in a good mood. They just dance around in their thongs and their high-heeled shoes, and you get to smoke bongs and play the Xbox all day long! They never seem to mind.
Bitches never complain. They never tell you to take your feet off the couch. Bitches don't ask "Are we gonna go see my mother?" Bitches don't even have mothers.
I don't know where they make the bitches. Some sort of genetics lab where they do that ass-shake move, where they can just shake that ass. You know the move it's the one only bitches can do.
Let's say you got a wife or girlfriend whatever, now your girl she might help you wash the car. But she's not gonna soap herself down in suds and press her tits into the windshield. But bitches will. That's how bitches wash shit. Bitches just soap themselves down and press their tits into things. They're always happy, and they won't do it alone. They'll invite a lot of other bitches over to soap their tits up and rub them on your car.
Let's say you might like a little champagne from time to time, right? You like a nice glass of champagne and you pour it in a glass. You don't shake it up and shoot it all over your face and your tits. But that's how bitches drink.
I don't know they just have a whole different anatomy. And if bitches get in a bad mood, all you gotta do is just turn some rap music up and they just dance more. It's like they can't help themselves.
So as you can see bitches rock.
Bitches are the best women in the world. Now I don't know if you watch a lot of hip-hop videos, but, man bitches are the shit!
Bitches are so much better than regular women. They are way cooler than wives or girlfriends. What we want is just to get a bunch of bitches to have with us. Cause bitches are fucking awesome! They're always in a good mood. They just dance around in their thongs and their high-heeled shoes, and you get to smoke bongs and play the Xbox all day long! They never seem to mind.
Bitches never complain. They never tell you to take your feet off the couch. Bitches don't ask "Are we gonna go see my mother?" Bitches don't even have mothers.
I don't know where they make the bitches. Some sort of genetics lab where they do that ass-shake move, where they can just shake that ass. You know the move it's the one only bitches can do.
Let's say you got a wife or girlfriend whatever, now your girl she might help you wash the car. But she's not gonna soap herself down in suds and press her tits into the windshield. But bitches will. That's how bitches wash shit. Bitches just soap themselves down and press their tits into things. They're always happy, and they won't do it alone. They'll invite a lot of other bitches over to soap their tits up and rub them on your car.
Let's say you might like a little champagne from time to time, right? You like a nice glass of champagne and you pour it in a glass. You don't shake it up and shoot it all over your face and your tits. But that's how bitches drink.
I don't know they just have a whole different anatomy. And if bitches get in a bad mood, all you gotta do is just turn some rap music up and they just dance more. It's like they can't help themselves.
So as you can see bitches rock.