On Halloween Candy
It seems you can't buy just candy corn anymore. I mean regular candy corn, that is, not the "chocolate" candy corn where the brown part doesn't taste like chocolate and the orange part doesn't taste like anything. You can get that and regular candy corn mixed, but you can't get a package of just regular, traditional, yellow-orange-white candy corn, and that saddens me.
Because it is my favorite.
Apparently most people hate candy corn? Or something? I don't know. Some comedian had a bit about how all the candy corn in existence was made in, like, 1922 or something, and they recycle it every year because no one eats it.
This is false. I eat all the candy corn I can get my hands on.
I can't even explain why I think it's so delicious. But I can tell you this: of the Halloween-only candy I can think of, candy corn is the only kind I actually like. The other kind being those little orange- or black-wrapped peanut butter taffy things, where it starts out tasting like okay taffy but it pulls all your fillings out and then kind of explodes with this dusty, tasteless, dry peanut butter and it's just disgusting.
You could claim there are other specifically Halloween candies but they all seem to amount to Halloween-stuff-shaped chocolates in Halloween-themed wrappers. And kids? You can get chocolate any time.
You can only get candy corn in October.
Maybe if I had it to eat all year I would get sick of it. I don't know.
It's not my favorite candy ever. It's not even my favorite holiday-themed candy. But it is my favorite Halloween candy. And I'm tired of people saying no one likes it. I do.
Because it is my favorite.
Apparently most people hate candy corn? Or something? I don't know. Some comedian had a bit about how all the candy corn in existence was made in, like, 1922 or something, and they recycle it every year because no one eats it.
This is false. I eat all the candy corn I can get my hands on.
I can't even explain why I think it's so delicious. But I can tell you this: of the Halloween-only candy I can think of, candy corn is the only kind I actually like. The other kind being those little orange- or black-wrapped peanut butter taffy things, where it starts out tasting like okay taffy but it pulls all your fillings out and then kind of explodes with this dusty, tasteless, dry peanut butter and it's just disgusting.
You could claim there are other specifically Halloween candies but they all seem to amount to Halloween-stuff-shaped chocolates in Halloween-themed wrappers. And kids? You can get chocolate any time.
You can only get candy corn in October.
Maybe if I had it to eat all year I would get sick of it. I don't know.
It's not my favorite candy ever. It's not even my favorite holiday-themed candy. But it is my favorite Halloween candy. And I'm tired of people saying no one likes it. I do.