Of Tinapay, Kisses, Food Trips and Hushed Stories
(This is an unfinished post. And will edit this someday, maybe. Maybe I will leave my stories unfinished. I do have a strange thing for those kinds of posts anyway, WHEN I am in the mood.)
Sorry for the lack of posting, my schedule is so hectic right now that I barely have time to sleep.
The past few weeks have been okay. Well, okay at best. Exhausting, really. But at least, I still have some things to be happy about.
My shift in the pediatric ward has just officially ended. I can't say I am happy about it. Though my other group mates are already tired of the pediatric ward since it is our second time already, this shift has been the most fun for me. Maybe it was because we had a lower census than before, since a lot of patients got discharged in our shift. Or that Ms. Judith Aguinaldo, our clinical instructor, is very very nice. Maybe it is because of the less number of medicines we had to do for our oral drug analysis, or maybe it was because I enjoyed establishing rapport with the kids. Especially Annie, Raven and Derwyne (which, I just noticed, all have leukemia.).
I don't think I will be a very good nurse. I don't have a good memory. I don't do science stuff. I really don't. I always make mistakes, especially when I feel the slightest pressure. I am prone to accidents. This is a fact. I am a klutz, so I have to double the effort into being careful. Kaya nila ako tinatawag na OC. Because sometimes, I really have to be one.
But I like talking to patients who would eventually like to interact. I love their stories. I love those kid's hugs. I love making them smile. In my own little way, I feel as if I have left a small imprint in their lives.
I am Raven's tinapay. Her B1 and B2.
I am the one Annie lent her pink "bracelet" to ("Wag mo sasabihin sa nurse ha? Secret lang natin to..."), the one she hugged and kissed and said "Wag mo buburahin kiss ko ha? Di ko rin buburahin yung sayo.".
I am the one whom Derwyne's lola showed her chubby pictures to (post-dexamethasone therapy = Cushingoid effects). The person she didn't want to leave her. The person who played with her and Annie and the wheelchair. The one who blew bubbles for her to play with.
I know I am not supposed to get attached with my patients, but I sincerely hope and pray that they will get better. Just as (I hope) I have become a part of their world, they have surely become a part of mine.
I hope that when I become a nurse, I will never forget this feeling of concern to my patients. I hope I will never forget how to treat them as human beings.
Sana, pagdating ng araw, hindi ko maisip na trabaho ko lang sila. At wala nang iba.
ABOUT ANNIE:
Back in our first shift, I first heard about her through Ma'am Gascon. She told us how hard it was to get her trust, and once you got it, it'll be hard to lose it. She would be sad when you would leave. She would not want to see your end shift. She would want for you to come back the next day. She was mature for her age.
But before you got all that, you have to make her talk to you first. And that was very hard, especially if she is in a bad mood.
I played with Annie before, but she was not my patient. Actually, Maan was the one assigned to her. That day, she needed to eat to be able to drink her medicine. She refused. Whatever Maan said, she did not want to listen. She did not want to eat. Even though I was not her nurse, I tried helping Maan. In the end, I was the one who was able to feed her, using her toy dinosaur.
"O sige, paunahan kayo ni Dinosaur ha! One, two.. three!"
Back then, I wanted her to be my patient. Because she would find it hard to open up to other nurses. And I was able to cross that barrier.
I never got to handle her.
I never thought that we would have another Pedia shift. I really did not expect it. And then there it was. Our second shift, bought about by seemingly bad luck in our schedule.
And surprisingly, our last week in our shift, she was apparently admitted for her chemotherapy.
I don't know if it was by chance, or if He wanted to give me a chance. But I was not assigned to her. Again. I was assigned to Derwyne instead. So I got my things and went to room 322.
She was playing with my patient.
Coincidence?
Sorry for the lack of posting, my schedule is so hectic right now that I barely have time to sleep.
The past few weeks have been okay. Well, okay at best. Exhausting, really. But at least, I still have some things to be happy about.
My shift in the pediatric ward has just officially ended. I can't say I am happy about it. Though my other group mates are already tired of the pediatric ward since it is our second time already, this shift has been the most fun for me. Maybe it was because we had a lower census than before, since a lot of patients got discharged in our shift. Or that Ms. Judith Aguinaldo, our clinical instructor, is very very nice. Maybe it is because of the less number of medicines we had to do for our oral drug analysis, or maybe it was because I enjoyed establishing rapport with the kids. Especially Annie, Raven and Derwyne (which, I just noticed, all have leukemia.).
I don't think I will be a very good nurse. I don't have a good memory. I don't do science stuff. I really don't. I always make mistakes, especially when I feel the slightest pressure. I am prone to accidents. This is a fact. I am a klutz, so I have to double the effort into being careful. Kaya nila ako tinatawag na OC. Because sometimes, I really have to be one.
But I like talking to patients who would eventually like to interact. I love their stories. I love those kid's hugs. I love making them smile. In my own little way, I feel as if I have left a small imprint in their lives.
I am Raven's tinapay. Her B1 and B2.
I am the one Annie lent her pink "bracelet" to ("Wag mo sasabihin sa nurse ha? Secret lang natin to..."), the one she hugged and kissed and said "Wag mo buburahin kiss ko ha? Di ko rin buburahin yung sayo.".
I am the one whom Derwyne's lola showed her chubby pictures to (post-dexamethasone therapy = Cushingoid effects). The person she didn't want to leave her. The person who played with her and Annie and the wheelchair. The one who blew bubbles for her to play with.
I know I am not supposed to get attached with my patients, but I sincerely hope and pray that they will get better. Just as (I hope) I have become a part of their world, they have surely become a part of mine.
I hope that when I become a nurse, I will never forget this feeling of concern to my patients. I hope I will never forget how to treat them as human beings.
Sana, pagdating ng araw, hindi ko maisip na trabaho ko lang sila. At wala nang iba.
ABOUT ANNIE:
Back in our first shift, I first heard about her through Ma'am Gascon. She told us how hard it was to get her trust, and once you got it, it'll be hard to lose it. She would be sad when you would leave. She would not want to see your end shift. She would want for you to come back the next day. She was mature for her age.
But before you got all that, you have to make her talk to you first. And that was very hard, especially if she is in a bad mood.
I played with Annie before, but she was not my patient. Actually, Maan was the one assigned to her. That day, she needed to eat to be able to drink her medicine. She refused. Whatever Maan said, she did not want to listen. She did not want to eat. Even though I was not her nurse, I tried helping Maan. In the end, I was the one who was able to feed her, using her toy dinosaur.
"O sige, paunahan kayo ni Dinosaur ha! One, two.. three!"
Back then, I wanted her to be my patient. Because she would find it hard to open up to other nurses. And I was able to cross that barrier.
I never got to handle her.
I never thought that we would have another Pedia shift. I really did not expect it. And then there it was. Our second shift, bought about by seemingly bad luck in our schedule.
And surprisingly, our last week in our shift, she was apparently admitted for her chemotherapy.
I don't know if it was by chance, or if He wanted to give me a chance. But I was not assigned to her. Again. I was assigned to Derwyne instead. So I got my things and went to room 322.
She was playing with my patient.
Coincidence?