earn yourself some trouble {tbbt - leslie/penny}
Title: Earn Yourself Some Trouble
Fandom: The Big Bang Theory
Characters/Pairings: Leslie/Penny
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 659
Author's Note: For Porn Battle X. Original version is here. This version is for archive purposes.
Summary: She doesn't know where the hell she gets her brand new shiny nickname but it's definitely unwelcome and mostly undeserved.
Penny doesn’t know where the hell she got the nickname Blow-Job Barbie.
She does know that it’s definitely unwelcome and mostly undeserved.
It’s not like she blew the entire football time and this is high school or some shit. She has a healthy sex life and some thirty-six hour rebounds that she would rather not discuss. Ever. Is she going to apologize for any of it? Not likely.
But at some point hearing Leslie repeatedly referring to Sheldon as Dr. Dumbass gets to her and she says as much.
Leslie retaliates by calling her Blow-Job Barbie.
And so it starts.
-
In the middle here, if the middle really mattered all that much, there is a period of one-upmanship.
Penny enlists Sheldon and, oddly enough, Raj to fuck with Leslie at Caltech - although technically Sheldon enlists himself; all it takes is a single mention of wanting to get back at Leslie and he’s listing off possible ways to sabotage her.
She isn’t really clear on the details of what went down but Leslie eats lunch at the Cheesecake Factory that same afternoon, during her shift, and by the time she’s gone she’s stiffed Penny out of a tip and complained to her manager about crappy service.
That’s day one.
The battle wages on for just shy of two weeks.
-
The seventh time she hears her brand new shiny nickname, she’s in Sheldon’s office, half-plotting, half-annoying him. Okay, maybe more like seventy-five percent annoying him.
Whatever. She’s in his office and Leslie says it with a fake smile that’s too cold to really rival Penny’s sugary sweet ones that she always shoots back.
“You know, really, that’s just inaccurate.”
Leslie raises an eyebrow. “Right.”
-
So.
Penny didn’t blow the entire football team.
She did, however, go down on a cheerleader once.
The cliché always has to find its way in there some way, even if it’s not the one people would expect.
-
This has to end sometime and it’s not like Penny can call Leslie’s mother and tattle.
She doesn’t even have Leslie’s mother’s phone number. Or Leslie’s phone number, though she imagines it wouldn’t take much effort to get it out of Leonard. Or Howard. They’ve both slept with her and they have to have it. She thinks.
How she’s the slutty one in this equation she’ll never know.
The next best thing, she figures, is direct confrontation that isn’t in someone’s place of work. No one gets fired and if there’s a catfight then there’s no one around to film it and put it up on Youtube the next day; Howard already tried that and learned his lesson.
So Penny shows up at her door and Leslie just shakes her head.
“Got to respect your follow through, Barbie.”
“Yeah, about that - ”
-
Penny is not above settling things in unorthodox ways.
It’s probably how she ends up on her knees in Leslie’s bedroom with the other woman’s head thrown back. Hair has been let down and glasses have been removed a long time ago, and while she’s heard stories about Leslie being pretty, well, harsh when it comes to criticizing people’s sexual prowess, the other woman hasn’t said a word, save for ones of encouragement.
She never says “please” though.
Penny expected that.
She does get more than a few moans out of her too, Leslie’s hands in Penny’s hair as she uses her tongue to trace the alphabet on Leslie’s clit.
Leslie comes on i.
-
“I guess that was inaccurate. Though Cunnilingus Barbie doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.”
Penny doesn’t laugh but it’s close.
A concentrated effort on a night that’s been all about them.
“You could just call me Penny and I could just call you Leslie.”
“I could.” Leslie leans back against the headboard. “But where would the fun be in that?”
Penny eyes her legs, half spread on the bed. “I think that was the fun.”
Fandom: The Big Bang Theory
Characters/Pairings: Leslie/Penny
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 659
Author's Note: For Porn Battle X. Original version is here. This version is for archive purposes.
Summary: She doesn't know where the hell she gets her brand new shiny nickname but it's definitely unwelcome and mostly undeserved.
Penny doesn’t know where the hell she got the nickname Blow-Job Barbie.
She does know that it’s definitely unwelcome and mostly undeserved.
It’s not like she blew the entire football time and this is high school or some shit. She has a healthy sex life and some thirty-six hour rebounds that she would rather not discuss. Ever. Is she going to apologize for any of it? Not likely.
But at some point hearing Leslie repeatedly referring to Sheldon as Dr. Dumbass gets to her and she says as much.
Leslie retaliates by calling her Blow-Job Barbie.
And so it starts.
-
In the middle here, if the middle really mattered all that much, there is a period of one-upmanship.
Penny enlists Sheldon and, oddly enough, Raj to fuck with Leslie at Caltech - although technically Sheldon enlists himself; all it takes is a single mention of wanting to get back at Leslie and he’s listing off possible ways to sabotage her.
She isn’t really clear on the details of what went down but Leslie eats lunch at the Cheesecake Factory that same afternoon, during her shift, and by the time she’s gone she’s stiffed Penny out of a tip and complained to her manager about crappy service.
That’s day one.
The battle wages on for just shy of two weeks.
-
The seventh time she hears her brand new shiny nickname, she’s in Sheldon’s office, half-plotting, half-annoying him. Okay, maybe more like seventy-five percent annoying him.
Whatever. She’s in his office and Leslie says it with a fake smile that’s too cold to really rival Penny’s sugary sweet ones that she always shoots back.
“You know, really, that’s just inaccurate.”
Leslie raises an eyebrow. “Right.”
-
So.
Penny didn’t blow the entire football team.
She did, however, go down on a cheerleader once.
The cliché always has to find its way in there some way, even if it’s not the one people would expect.
-
This has to end sometime and it’s not like Penny can call Leslie’s mother and tattle.
She doesn’t even have Leslie’s mother’s phone number. Or Leslie’s phone number, though she imagines it wouldn’t take much effort to get it out of Leonard. Or Howard. They’ve both slept with her and they have to have it. She thinks.
How she’s the slutty one in this equation she’ll never know.
The next best thing, she figures, is direct confrontation that isn’t in someone’s place of work. No one gets fired and if there’s a catfight then there’s no one around to film it and put it up on Youtube the next day; Howard already tried that and learned his lesson.
So Penny shows up at her door and Leslie just shakes her head.
“Got to respect your follow through, Barbie.”
“Yeah, about that - ”
-
Penny is not above settling things in unorthodox ways.
It’s probably how she ends up on her knees in Leslie’s bedroom with the other woman’s head thrown back. Hair has been let down and glasses have been removed a long time ago, and while she’s heard stories about Leslie being pretty, well, harsh when it comes to criticizing people’s sexual prowess, the other woman hasn’t said a word, save for ones of encouragement.
She never says “please” though.
Penny expected that.
She does get more than a few moans out of her too, Leslie’s hands in Penny’s hair as she uses her tongue to trace the alphabet on Leslie’s clit.
Leslie comes on i.
-
“I guess that was inaccurate. Though Cunnilingus Barbie doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.”
Penny doesn’t laugh but it’s close.
A concentrated effort on a night that’s been all about them.
“You could just call me Penny and I could just call you Leslie.”
“I could.” Leslie leans back against the headboard. “But where would the fun be in that?”
Penny eyes her legs, half spread on the bed. “I think that was the fun.”