Apr 26, 2008 16:04
Title: Every Man For Himself
Fandom: Lost
Characters/Pairings: Sawyer, Miles
Word Count: 718
Rating: PG
Author's Note: My first try at any of the four new characters -- it had to come some time I guess.
Summary: Post 4.9 - The Shape Of Things To Come. Sawyer knows Miles watches him. It's not that he's unused to the attention; it's just usually he's drawing it intentionally. Usually he knows the reason. This is something new.
Sawyer knows Miles watches him. He doesn’t know why, he can just feel eyes burning into his back while they walk, sometimes while they all try to sleep. It’s not that he’s unused to the attention; it’s just usually he’s drawing it intentionally.
He doesn’t ask, he lets it slide, waits for Miles to come to him. He has more important things to worry about, like getting back to the beach in one piece.
He doesn’t have to wait long.
They’re gathering firewood, just before nightfall, close enough to hear Claire should she need him. He won’t let Miles alone with her; doesn’t trust him.
“So are you like the leader guy?” Miles asks, not really doing much in the way of gathering. Preoccupied by the topic at hand, Sawyer thinks, because if he acted like this all the time they would have left his ass several miles back.
“You must have me confused.” He tells him, thinking he couldn’t be farther from the truth.
“Alright then why are you so protective over her?” Claire, he thinks. “And the big guy? Hurley?”
“Why’re you so damn curious?” He’s the one that should be asking questions. Until a day and a half ago Miles was a friggin’ hostage. Sawyer owes him nothing.
Miles skips right over that. “Those are your people on the beach right?”
Sawyer nods, if for no other reason but to see where he’s going with this now.
“Why did you split off from them?”
”I don’t know. Why’d you split off from your group?”
“I got taken hostage.” Miles practically spits at him, which was exactly the reaction Sawyer was looking for. Turning the tables on him is one way to sidetrack him and get off this topic.
“You had the option of going with them. And yet you decided to go along with us.” He points out.
“My people were getting sucked up by that...thing.” He’s dropped the firewood he was holding, thrown aside for the moment. So has Sawyer. Game on. “That thing that Linus summoned. Do you see why we were after him?”
“Look, that’s your business. I don’t care if you take him or not. I care when you’re shooting up everyone else in the process.”
“That wasn’t me!”
“The people from your freighter, whatever.” Sawyer’s in no mood for technicalities.
“They’re not - “ Miles pauses, his mouth moving around his next words silently for a moment, before, “I’m in this for different reasons than they are.”
“Right, the money.” Miles nods. “So you don’t care about them.”
“Some more than others.” He goes back on his original statement, but Sawyer had kind of figured that out already. He didn’t seem too broken up about smokey going after them, or being split from them. “What? Are you saying you care about what happens to all of these people? The ones you’re with.”
He’ll lie and say it anyways, even if he doesn’t mean it. This kid isn’t getting anymore ammunition. “Yes.”
“Yeah, sure.” His voice is thick with sarcasm. “You’re just like that doctor guy. You can’t save everyone. It’s every man for himself.”
And Sawyer never thought he’d be standing here disagreeing with that. That was his mantra, his way of life. He doesn’t know when it stopped being his. He doesn’t know what changed. He hadn’t even realized anything had until now, with Jack’s words running through his head. Every man for himself is not going to work.
He’s not that guy. He might be right now, but he won’t be forever. He’s nothing like Jack, not really. Jack will be the loyal leader until he dies. Sawyer’s just realizing he can’t do this on his own.
“I’m nothing like the Doc.” He says, aloud this time. He leaves the other part alone.
“Whatever you say.” More sarcasm, this time in the form of a raised eyebrow and a doubting expression.
With that they put a long overdue end to a conversation that Sawyer never wanted to be in the first place. And when they get back to that night’s camp and he can’t find Claire and his heart starts pounding in his chest until she appears from behind a tree, saying she was just looking around, he wonders when he did start worrying so much about these people.
character: lost: sawyer,
fandom: lost,
character: lost: miles,
!fic