That. Is. Enough.
It has been a tough couple of days for me.
Things had been looking up for me in the STL area. I was on my way to getting a part time job, and forming a community with fellow ESA-ers, and distracting myself from my empty apartment.
Well...I didn't get the job. And it was like I had pumped all my expectations into this balloon...and the balloon popped! The subsequent meeting of my Sister in ESA at the St. Jude Dream Home was muddied with disappointment.
Don't get me wrong, the ladies of ESA I have met so far are mostly very welcoming and nice. I'm trying to be as nice and helpful as possible. Of course there is a grace period where they need to learn about me and vice versa, but for the most part I don't forsee a problem in that area. It's just that they are all....older. Nothing wrong with that. Just....they aren't going to go out to the bars with me.
And so my disappointments manifested. I spent the entire Friday inside my apartment. The only person I actually talked to was the maintenance guy. My days are spent lounging either on the couch or in my bed, watching Netflix, reading, and flipping through the four channels I get on my antenna.
But today, I was getting ready to go volunteer at the St. Jude Dream Home. and I noticed a quotation I had put up on my door. It struck a chord with me. It goes like this:
"Laugh at yourself, but don't ever aim your doubt at yourself. Be bold. When you embark for strange places, don't leave any of yourself safely on shore. have the nerve to go into the unexplored territory" - Alan Alda.
I went to St. Jude Dream Home and volunteered for roughly 5 hours. I had some small conversations with strangers, repeated alot of the same information over and over, but tried to be as helpful and bright as possible. Trying to figure out if the guy who designed the house is cute, and whether or not he keeps looking at me like I keep looking at him. And I got back home. And i layed around again.
And then i saw the quote again.
That. Is. IT. I cannot meet anyone by sitting locked up in my apartment. I'm weirdly hopeful for doing laundry tomorrow, since I have to sit around and wait for it, while possibly meeting people. I'm going to go out and look for a job. I'm going to say hi to people and smile.
anyways, i need to leave this stupid apartment. i've had ENOUGH sitting around.
seriously, thats enough.
Things had been looking up for me in the STL area. I was on my way to getting a part time job, and forming a community with fellow ESA-ers, and distracting myself from my empty apartment.
Well...I didn't get the job. And it was like I had pumped all my expectations into this balloon...and the balloon popped! The subsequent meeting of my Sister in ESA at the St. Jude Dream Home was muddied with disappointment.
Don't get me wrong, the ladies of ESA I have met so far are mostly very welcoming and nice. I'm trying to be as nice and helpful as possible. Of course there is a grace period where they need to learn about me and vice versa, but for the most part I don't forsee a problem in that area. It's just that they are all....older. Nothing wrong with that. Just....they aren't going to go out to the bars with me.
And so my disappointments manifested. I spent the entire Friday inside my apartment. The only person I actually talked to was the maintenance guy. My days are spent lounging either on the couch or in my bed, watching Netflix, reading, and flipping through the four channels I get on my antenna.
But today, I was getting ready to go volunteer at the St. Jude Dream Home. and I noticed a quotation I had put up on my door. It struck a chord with me. It goes like this:
"Laugh at yourself, but don't ever aim your doubt at yourself. Be bold. When you embark for strange places, don't leave any of yourself safely on shore. have the nerve to go into the unexplored territory" - Alan Alda.
I went to St. Jude Dream Home and volunteered for roughly 5 hours. I had some small conversations with strangers, repeated alot of the same information over and over, but tried to be as helpful and bright as possible. Trying to figure out if the guy who designed the house is cute, and whether or not he keeps looking at me like I keep looking at him. And I got back home. And i layed around again.
And then i saw the quote again.
That. Is. IT. I cannot meet anyone by sitting locked up in my apartment. I'm weirdly hopeful for doing laundry tomorrow, since I have to sit around and wait for it, while possibly meeting people. I'm going to go out and look for a job. I'm going to say hi to people and smile.
anyways, i need to leave this stupid apartment. i've had ENOUGH sitting around.
seriously, thats enough.