Hmmm
Hmm... my fishtank has already experienced its first loss. Shmoo. He'll be remembered.
Its really my own fault. I knew it was going to happen. The first thing i said in the mourning to lyndon was .."look at the fishtank, i think my fish are dead" . To no surprise one of my fish was indeed dead. Lyndon started freaking out and getting all hyper practically screaming and calling me grandma death (not literally). I intuition usually never fails me but on this particular occasion i did know that the night before i had completely broken the filter by not unplugging it while changing the water. Anybody with a fish tank knows that the filter must have water flowing through it continuesly or the filter will break. This is the second occasion that ive done this as well so i have a feeling the thing was already half broken and not doing the job well and the second time just really fucked up the water levels and poor old shmoo couldnt hack it. ..... That or ozzy really got sick of him and just attacked him to death. He really was the instigater of the tank. Anyways we bought a new filter and all i can say is............. next on survivor, who will be the next of the final three to be kicked off the island.
So this is the first week of my 2 weeks of loneliness. Lyndon left Friday at 12 and spent the night at his dads getting up at 7 to catch his plane to vancouver where he stayed for the day and then got on another plane to hawaii... Needless to say i havent left the house and sleep is pretty much not going to happen. Im not comfortable alone. His mom followed to mexico the next day. Hes gone for his 19th birthday and valentines day.
The only thing that got my spirts up was the batch of betty crocker cookies i just baked.....
Ive been trying to stay focused to do my portfolio but ..i just cant get the motivation. I need like a personal motivation speaker, coach or some sort of self help professional to walk around my house and follow me. I think anyone who knows me would agree. I just need 3 extra pushs to get something done.. Ahh why do i do this to myself........
With that said ...
Black then white are all i see in my infancy.
red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.
lets me see.
as below, so above and beyond, I imagine
drawn beyond the lines of reason.
Push the envelope. Watch it bend.
Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.
Withering my intuition, missing opportunities and I must
Feed my will to feel my moment drawing way outside the lines.
Black then white are all i see in my infancy.
red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.
lets me see there is so much more and
beckons me to look thru to these infinite possibilities.
as below, so above and beyond, I imagine
drawn outside the lines of reason.
Push the envelope. Watch it bend.
over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.
Withering my intuition leaving opportunities behind.
Feed my will to feel this moment urging me to cross the line.
Reaching out to embrace the random.
Reaching out to embrace whatever may come.
I embrace my desire to
I embrace my desire to
feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow
to feel inspired to fathom the power, to witness the beauty,
to bathe in the fountain,
to swing on the spiral
to swing on the spiral
to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human.
With my feet upon the ground I move myeslf between the sounds and open wide to suck it in.
I feel it move across my skin.
I'm reaching up and reaching out. I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Its really my own fault. I knew it was going to happen. The first thing i said in the mourning to lyndon was .."look at the fishtank, i think my fish are dead" . To no surprise one of my fish was indeed dead. Lyndon started freaking out and getting all hyper practically screaming and calling me grandma death (not literally). I intuition usually never fails me but on this particular occasion i did know that the night before i had completely broken the filter by not unplugging it while changing the water. Anybody with a fish tank knows that the filter must have water flowing through it continuesly or the filter will break. This is the second occasion that ive done this as well so i have a feeling the thing was already half broken and not doing the job well and the second time just really fucked up the water levels and poor old shmoo couldnt hack it. ..... That or ozzy really got sick of him and just attacked him to death. He really was the instigater of the tank. Anyways we bought a new filter and all i can say is............. next on survivor, who will be the next of the final three to be kicked off the island.
So this is the first week of my 2 weeks of loneliness. Lyndon left Friday at 12 and spent the night at his dads getting up at 7 to catch his plane to vancouver where he stayed for the day and then got on another plane to hawaii... Needless to say i havent left the house and sleep is pretty much not going to happen. Im not comfortable alone. His mom followed to mexico the next day. Hes gone for his 19th birthday and valentines day.
The only thing that got my spirts up was the batch of betty crocker cookies i just baked.....
Ive been trying to stay focused to do my portfolio but ..i just cant get the motivation. I need like a personal motivation speaker, coach or some sort of self help professional to walk around my house and follow me. I think anyone who knows me would agree. I just need 3 extra pushs to get something done.. Ahh why do i do this to myself........
With that said ...
Black then white are all i see in my infancy.
red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.
lets me see.
as below, so above and beyond, I imagine
drawn beyond the lines of reason.
Push the envelope. Watch it bend.
Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.
Withering my intuition, missing opportunities and I must
Feed my will to feel my moment drawing way outside the lines.
Black then white are all i see in my infancy.
red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.
lets me see there is so much more and
beckons me to look thru to these infinite possibilities.
as below, so above and beyond, I imagine
drawn outside the lines of reason.
Push the envelope. Watch it bend.
over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.
Withering my intuition leaving opportunities behind.
Feed my will to feel this moment urging me to cross the line.
Reaching out to embrace the random.
Reaching out to embrace whatever may come.
I embrace my desire to
I embrace my desire to
feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow
to feel inspired to fathom the power, to witness the beauty,
to bathe in the fountain,
to swing on the spiral
to swing on the spiral
to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human.
With my feet upon the ground I move myeslf between the sounds and open wide to suck it in.
I feel it move across my skin.
I'm reaching up and reaching out. I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.
Spiral out. Keep going.