tell me tell me

Oct 26, 2013 02:30

sekai & xiuhan
pg; 2.1k
-written for this prompt
-warning: cavity inducing levels of fluff



There's something about knowing someone more than half your life that makes being in a relationship more comfortable. Sehun can honestly say that he's lived more years with Jongin in his life than without. Even before they were going out they were friends and then best friends.

So it's natural that Sehun knows Jongin inside out and Jongin knows Sehun outside in.

He knows how Jongin worries when Sehun doesn't text him to tell him that class ran late, and he knows that Jongin likes it when Sehun wears those black skinny jeans, and he knows that Jongin secretly likes watching So You Think You Can Dance even though he likes making fun of all the contestants. Jongin's feelings are an open book that Sehun is constantly reading.

They rarely talk about their feelings because they always just know.

And that's why it's such a surprise when they're cuddling together late at night, Sehun fisting his hands in Jongin's shirt and Jongin's fingers tangling in his hair, and Jongin says those words.

"I love you," Jongin mumbles into Sehun's neck. His breath is hot and it feels like the words I LOVE YOU are being seared into his neck. They wiggle uncomfortably against Sehun's skin, clawing nervously at his insides.

And Sehun really doesn't want to break the mood, now that Jongin is so soft and pliant against him, but they've never really said that before and he can't help the way that his body stiffens and he awkwardly chokes out, "Uh, yeah."

Jongin looks at him strangely, but he doesn't say anything else.

And when Sehun attaches his mouth to Jongin's neck and starts peeling up his shirt, the awkward moment is forgotten in groans and whines.

"So he said it," Kyungsoo deadpans over a cup of coffee. "About time."

Sehun hates coffee but he likes Kyungsoo so he'll make an exception this time.

"What do you mean?" Sehun wrinkles his nose as he takes a sip of his latte.

Kyungsoo tilts his head. "What do you mean? Of course he loves you, it was only a matter of time until he put words to it. And you've been together for how long? I'm actually surprised he didn't say anything earlier."

"I guess," Sehun mumbles into his coffee. "I just don't get why we have to say anything." He's toying with grabbing some extra sugar and cream, but he looks over at Kyungsoo's Americano and decides to bear with the bitterness.

Kyungsoo shrugged. "It's nice to know."

"But he knows how I feel." Sehun insists.

"Are you sure?"

He must, Sehun wants to say, but now he's not so certain.

Friday night is the night that Jongin and Sehun usually marathon whatever anime Jongin's been into and stuff their faces with popcorn and bagel bites. So on Friday after dinner, Sehun tries finding a link of Attack on Titan that'll buffer before they die of old age while Jongin struggles with the toaster oven.

"Should I set it to toast or bake?" Jongin calls from the kitchen.

"Huh?" Sehun's a bit distracted because he's trying to decide between using youtube and putlocker. The youtube video seems like it's loading quicker, but the putlocker one is in HD.

"Toast or bake?"

Sehun's face scrunches. "Aren't they the same?"

Jongin's laughter sounds closer than the kitchen, and Sehun looks up to find Jongin standing in the doorway. "That's what I thought."

They're curled up together on the couch, snacking as they watch character after character getting mauled, when Jongin shifts a bit on the couch. Sehun's had a few misgivings about how graphic the show was, but he stopped caring somewhere between episode two and three. So he's watching intently as one of the characters ends an aerial stunt with a few clean chops when Jongin's movement catches his attention.

Usually Jongin would be asleep by now (somehow even though he's the one that picks the show, Sehun always ends up finishing the show on his own) and Sehun's a bit surprised to see that his boyfriend's eyes are still open. He inches forward enough that he can wrap his arms around Jongin, pulling them together until he can feel the heat of Jongin's body and the ridge of his spine.

The episode ends, and Sehun leans forward to click the tab with the next episode loaded. He still has one arm around Jongin's shoulders, and when he moves he can feel Jongin's hair brushing against his collarbone.

And against the backdrop of a j-pop song, Jongin speaks.

"Do you love me, Sehun?"

The words are soft and timid, and Sehun can tell that Jongin has been waiting a long time to say them. He draws his hand back from his laptop.

Yes, he wants to say. Of course, he wants to say. How could you think otherwise?

But when he looks down at Jongin he can't think of anything to say. So he closes the distance between their lips and says it the only way he knows how to.

Jongin doesn't talk about it the next day, and neither does Sehun, but he can still feel the words lingering between them. Sometimes when Sehun turns away he turns back to find Jongin looking a little sad and a little lost, and it really hurts to see him like that. He aches to kiss away Jongin's worries, to wrap his arms around his neck and mouth reassurances into his neck. But whenever Jongin catches Sehun looking at him he smiles and makes another one of his dumb jokes.

Sehun's not sure what he hates more: Jongin's forced smiles or the fact that he's the reason for those fake smiles.

He never noticed how often people use the word love, but suddenly it feels like they're surrounded by it. Girls around them are squealing about how much they love an idol group, an advertisement in the window of a department store talks about clothes to fall in love with, and-

It's all around them, but Sehun still can't figure out how to say it.

Sehun is starting to think that this cup of honeydew bubble tea is not worth sitting through an hour of Luhan bragging about his boyfriend. He'd rushed out of the house early because it still felt awkward around Jongin, but he was already regretting his decision to call Luhan.

"Next time I'll see if Yixing is free instead," Sehun mutters around his straw, after Luhan tells him (for the millionth time) about their upcoming plans for the long weekend.

But (un)fortunately, instead of getting offended, Luhan smiles and lightly slaps Sehun's arm. "It's okay, I know you don't mean it. It's just the jealousy talking." Luhan casts a pitying look in Sehun's direction and Sehun is really close to pouring his bubble tea all over his dear hyung's lap.

But before Luhan can say anything else that might snap Sehun's restraint, an A Pink song begins to blare and Luhan scrambles to grab his phone. "Ah, Minseokie!" He coos into his phone, "We were just talking about you!"

Sehun doesn't bother listening to Luhan talk. He knows that their conversation will be full of sickeningly sweet pet names and aegyo and other things he doesn't really want to hear. But he likes watching Luhan's face as he talks. Luhan has always been expressive, and when he talks to Minseok every emotion is even more exaggerated. His face breaks into an impossibly wide smile at something that Minseok says, and then his head falls back as he laughs.

It might be because he and Jongin are dancers, but words have never been that important. There's nothing that they say in words that can't be said in the snap of their hips or the whisper of sheets. Their words are in their actions and their sweet nothings are pressed on the ends of their fingertips.

He thinks that there's more love in the way Luhan's eyes light up than the words he's saying. There's love in the way his fingers flutter as he speaks, and there's love in the way he pushes his bangs from his eyes. Sehun watches him speak as he fishes around for the last bubbles amongst the ice cubes.

But then Luhan's expression suddenly changes.

"I love you," Luhan whispers, flush spilling over his cheeks and creeping up his ears.

And ah, there are those words again.

Sehun never thought that words were very important, but maybe it was because he had never had to think about it before.

But now that he's thinking about these three little words that keep getting stuck in his throat, he's realizing how much he took for granted. Jongin has always told him how lucky he was to have Sehun, and what has Sehun given him in return?

He'd thought that Jongin could see inside his heart as clearly as he could see inside Jongin's. He had thought that they didn't need words. But maybe it wasn't that they didn't need words, but that Jongin had just never asked for words before.

And that, Sehun thinks is the answer to everything.

Even if it's difficult to say, even if he doesn't see the point to saying anything, if Jongin needs words then Sehun will give him words.

Jongin wakes up to the smell of something burning.

"I hope you're not trying to burn the apartment down," Jongin calls out as he wanders into the kitchen. The linoleum floors are cool underneath his feet, and he tries to step on the ends of his sweatpants to keep warm. "I don't know about you, but I still want my safety deposit back."

"Ha ha," laughs Sehuns tonelessly. "Is that what you say to the sweet boyfriend who made you breakfast?"

"What breakfast? All I can see is burnt toast and cup ramen."

"The toast setting is false advertisement," Sehun grumbles sulkily. "And I'm sorry I'm not skilled enough to make bagel bites like you."

Jongin laughs as he settles down at the table. He perches on the chair, tucking his toes into the folds of his sweatpants as he grabs a piece of toast from the pile. It's not actually that burnt, and the fact that it's smothered in cinnamon sugar and butter helps hide the charred taste.

Sehun watches him eat carefully, chewing his lip. He looks so worried and nervous that Jongin almost laughs.

"Don't worry it doesn't taste that burn-"

But Sehun doesn't let Jongin finish complimenting his attempts at cooking. "I love you."

Jongin almost chokes on his toast. "What?"

Sehun can't look him in the eyes anymore. He's picking at the fraying edge of the tablecloth and his face is bright red and Jongin heart squeezes because he thinks that this is the most adorable he's seen Sehun so far. "I'm sorry I couldn't say it before, I just... I didn't think it mattered if I said it or not. But then it turned out you didn't know and-"

"Shit, Sehun are you crying?"

Sehun furiously scrubs at his eyes with his sleeves. He's supposed to be confessing to Jongin and giving him all the sappy words he's never said before, not crying.

At once Jongin's arms are around him, "It's okay, it's okay."

"It's not okay! I finally said it and now I'm crying like a wuss, I-"

Jongin grabs Sehun's face in his hands, thumbs rubbing over Sehun's cheekbones. "Say it again?"

It takes a moment before Sehun understands what Jongin's asking for, but when he gets it the corner of his mouth quirks into a thin smile. "I love you," he whispers.

"Again." Jongin presses their foreheads together, eyes shining with repressed laughter.

"I LOVE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU HAPPY?" He's sure his face is red from embarrassment but it's all worth it to see Jongin's wide smile.

"Very."

Jongin leans in further, pressing their lips together, until all Sehun can taste is burnt toast and cinnamon.

"I feel so relieved now that I've said it," Sehun confesses later as their legs tangle together on the couch. "Like now that I've said it it's not such a big deal." He's sitting back against Jongin's chest with his head tucked against his shoulder.

Jongin raises an eyebrow. "Oh, really? So now I can ask you to tell me that you love me whenever I want?" He pulls back a bit so he can look down at Sehun. "Like right now?"

Sehun's ears are burning again. "I lov-" He stutters over the words, biting his tongue in the process. "Okay, so maybe I'm still not used to it." He admits, cheeks flaming from his attempts.

And Jongin laughs as he whispers I love you into Sehun's ear again and again until Sehun is squirming and hitting Jongin's shoulder so that he'll shut up and stop being so cheesy.

(But even Sehun has to admit that sometimes words are nice.)

a/n: I'M SORRY

genre: fluff, pairing: sehun/kai, !fanfic, author: edoriko, rating: pg, length: one-shot, pairing: xiumin/luhan

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