academic announcements, life, and sundries

[slingstone]

I've been very unhappy and restless academically.  This lead to depression symptoms; poor energy, irregular sleeping & eating, as well as a lack of confidence and commitment for my classes and future in the major.  I don't know if I have the skill and interest to master the History & Philosophy of Science at a scholarly level where I could ever

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[slingstone]

One of my fears in "publishing" my reasons and plan here and on facebook was that I came off as overly maudlin or solemn in my pronouncement that "I fucked up and now I need to pay my country back with service." While that is part of my motivation, it's not the majority. I was getting sour on the whole college scene and it's youthful frivolities. I want to do something else someWHERE else for a while. This is a chance to travel and see parts of my country and other countries that I could not see otherwise. In the beginning of moby dick (I think), Ishmael talks about how one should never travel (in his day, by boat) as merely a passenger paying for the privilege; if you really want to see a place, you ought to sign on as part of the crew and earn your way with labor.
There is also a bit political motivation. I remember sometime back in the election campaign, one of the conservative pundits saying that there are no liberals in the military. It struck me as both obviously false and a very ideologically bold thing to declare. I'm not sure I would identify myself as a "liberal," considering all the ideological baggage that goes along with that, but I am against such divisive thinking and rhetoric and I'm prepared to act on my conviction.
There's some sociological and educational motivation too. I had been reading a bit about military culture and the perception of the military since vietnam. I think it's a disservice to everyone for the cultures to be so separate and occasionally hostile. I think the Nordic countries have the right idea; when everyone has to serve, even if it's only for a year or so, then the citizens understand what the military is and isn't. They know it's role and from then on there is a sense of ownership, rather than seeing it as a hostile or strange "other" in conflict with other cultures.
There are financial considerations; those student loans would come calling if I'm not in the military or enrolled somewhere else by the fall. It's a steady job with great benefits, certainly relative to the entry-level service and retail options available to me at the moment.
And lastly there are the shallow appeals; shooting guns and blowing stuff up and 'free' camping gear.

[fitz_clementine]

Okay.

Well. Best of luck, and come what may, don't rape anybody, try not to kill any civilians, and try not to die.