(no subject)
I've only posted 4 times in the past two years...whoa. It's interesting to read the random snapshots of my life from the times I did decide to record something. Having a journal is so interesting... there are so many thoughts you forget about if you don't record them. It's so easy to look at old pictures to remember things, but old journal entries are what remind you of who you were rather than what you did.
(Looking back, I feel like I've kind of scabbed-over where the world is concerned. I was waking up to it then, and it has been so overwhelming and transforming that I feel like there's a callous where I used to be so affected. I don't think that's a good thing at all, but how do you even begin to think about everything that's out there? I am distracted from the world by my busy schedule, I suppose just hoping that what I do now will result in me being able to make some kind of difference later? But in the meantime I feel shut off and fluffed over...).
Starting today I finally get to be at home for an extended period of time. The last two weeks have been exam-finishing, Christmasing, Ithaca-visiting, and St. Mary's celebrating. I loved it all, but it will be nice to be here with nothing but books, ingredients, and sidewalks/trails. Oh, and the occasional person to interact with :). And maybe some time to think.
I didn't realize until this past week what I've been doing in my own head where my future is concerned (we're talking careers here).
I've wanted to study Nutrition since high school. I still want to go to grad school for nutrition, but I've been opening myself up to the idea that what I find there might not be what I want. I know there are so many options for what you can do with Nutrition. I know I don't want to just sit in an office and advise people on what to eat. I don't know yet if I want to work in a lab...there are so many things you can study in a lab that I won't know until I have some experience in the area. Basically my plan of "going to grad school for Nutrition" is just a way to keep things open ended. I want to be challenged by what I do, but is that more important than making as big a difference as I can? What if I worked with schools to make their lunch plans more healthful and sustainable, developing plans for community gardens that involve the students? That certainly isn't intellectually stimulating in the sense of molecules and reactions and "science," but I can hardly imagine something more directly beneficial to a community. (This probably hearkens to your recent dilemmas, Rachel...I only realized this week that I'm going to have to deal with the same types of issues for my own future...). Realistically I know that not everyone can make a living and a difference at the same time. But I feel like I'm fortunate enough to have the possibility to do that, and that I should take advantage. I also know that it's important to do something you love.
Which brings me to food. Food, recipes, cooking, baking speak to me in an unexplainable way. They fulfill something within me. It's like an addiction. I have an addiction to taste and its creation (luckily, I'm also a little addicted to health, and they balance out).
What if I could replace others' addictions with one like mine? There's music therapy, how about cooking therapy?
I have a free semester next Fall, and my mom really wants me to try and find an internship. I agree that that's a very good idea, but I wasn't enthusiastic about it, probably because I was limiting my idea of an internship to what I did at NIST two summers ago, which was cool but not something I want to spend months of my life doing again. So I think I'm going to either look for something like Eric is doing now (though I need to ask him more about it) or look for a semester cooking program somewhere. Because I don't know the next opportunity I'll have to do something like that, and I want to try it at some point during my life. And heck, if I'm going to do cooking therapy, I'd better know how to cook :)
Wow, writing this really helped direct my thoughts. You might be encountering me here a little more often...
Oh, and here's the quote that kind of sparked this whole realization-stream. (Quoted in the beginning of a cookbook I bought in a used bookshop in Ithaca: a novel-size, 1957 Italian cookbook by the daughter of a Sicilian immigrant):
The intention of every other piece of prose may be discussed and even mistrusted but the purpose of a cookery book is one and unmistakable. Its object can conceivably be no other than to increase the happiness of mankind. -Joseph Conrad
(Looking back, I feel like I've kind of scabbed-over where the world is concerned. I was waking up to it then, and it has been so overwhelming and transforming that I feel like there's a callous where I used to be so affected. I don't think that's a good thing at all, but how do you even begin to think about everything that's out there? I am distracted from the world by my busy schedule, I suppose just hoping that what I do now will result in me being able to make some kind of difference later? But in the meantime I feel shut off and fluffed over...).
Starting today I finally get to be at home for an extended period of time. The last two weeks have been exam-finishing, Christmasing, Ithaca-visiting, and St. Mary's celebrating. I loved it all, but it will be nice to be here with nothing but books, ingredients, and sidewalks/trails. Oh, and the occasional person to interact with :). And maybe some time to think.
I didn't realize until this past week what I've been doing in my own head where my future is concerned (we're talking careers here).
I've wanted to study Nutrition since high school. I still want to go to grad school for nutrition, but I've been opening myself up to the idea that what I find there might not be what I want. I know there are so many options for what you can do with Nutrition. I know I don't want to just sit in an office and advise people on what to eat. I don't know yet if I want to work in a lab...there are so many things you can study in a lab that I won't know until I have some experience in the area. Basically my plan of "going to grad school for Nutrition" is just a way to keep things open ended. I want to be challenged by what I do, but is that more important than making as big a difference as I can? What if I worked with schools to make their lunch plans more healthful and sustainable, developing plans for community gardens that involve the students? That certainly isn't intellectually stimulating in the sense of molecules and reactions and "science," but I can hardly imagine something more directly beneficial to a community. (This probably hearkens to your recent dilemmas, Rachel...I only realized this week that I'm going to have to deal with the same types of issues for my own future...). Realistically I know that not everyone can make a living and a difference at the same time. But I feel like I'm fortunate enough to have the possibility to do that, and that I should take advantage. I also know that it's important to do something you love.
Which brings me to food. Food, recipes, cooking, baking speak to me in an unexplainable way. They fulfill something within me. It's like an addiction. I have an addiction to taste and its creation (luckily, I'm also a little addicted to health, and they balance out).
What if I could replace others' addictions with one like mine? There's music therapy, how about cooking therapy?
I have a free semester next Fall, and my mom really wants me to try and find an internship. I agree that that's a very good idea, but I wasn't enthusiastic about it, probably because I was limiting my idea of an internship to what I did at NIST two summers ago, which was cool but not something I want to spend months of my life doing again. So I think I'm going to either look for something like Eric is doing now (though I need to ask him more about it) or look for a semester cooking program somewhere. Because I don't know the next opportunity I'll have to do something like that, and I want to try it at some point during my life. And heck, if I'm going to do cooking therapy, I'd better know how to cook :)
Wow, writing this really helped direct my thoughts. You might be encountering me here a little more often...
Oh, and here's the quote that kind of sparked this whole realization-stream. (Quoted in the beginning of a cookbook I bought in a used bookshop in Ithaca: a novel-size, 1957 Italian cookbook by the daughter of a Sicilian immigrant):
The intention of every other piece of prose may be discussed and even mistrusted but the purpose of a cookery book is one and unmistakable. Its object can conceivably be no other than to increase the happiness of mankind. -Joseph Conrad