audio

[slighted_stains]

[white noise, the connection severing throughout]

-- nd the authorities can handle the living. The dead won't wait.

[pause, then the increasing sounds of supernatural activity that's been punctuating train murders. Creaks, thuds, wood breaking, something like...scissors cutting perpetually, dripping, and overlapping voices]

Om. Amirita --

[

Comments

action;

[lipstickninja]

[ They decided to separate --Hokuto decided, at least. She wants to check on the victims, close their eyes, give them a semblance of final respect. And count how many there are. Come find me when you're done, she said, Then you can make sure they're at peace.

But from a compartment away she heard the loud thud and her mind rushed to all the ugliest possibilities. No no no not now not when we've just-- I've just-- running as fast as her feet can take her, much too slow, she slams open the door to find him-- ]

Subaru!

[ Kneels down on the floor beside him, one hand tucking his hair behind his ears and the other finding his hand. She almost sighs in relief, but resorts to words instead. ]

It was too much, wasn't it? Was there too many of them? You shouldn't be so careless --okay, wait here, I'll get you some water. And towels. Don't worry about that, I'll help you clean it up.

action;

[slighted_stains]

[her voice, more than anything, breaks him out of it - not the distraught tone, not the words in themselves, but the speed with which they fly by him.]

Hokuto.

[slowly, surely, patiently, Hokuto, give me a moment to hear you. He can't tell her that. And she knows, anyway - the old tricks, and the old rites and the old practices. When nausea dispels, he brings himself to his knees, almost laughing hoarsely through it.]

Thank you. It's fine - I'm fine.

[He coughs a little, fixing the strain in his voice.]

I'd forgot what it was like.

action;

[lipstickninja]

[ She knows, sometimes, but she more often forgets, never one to go through a mental checklist of rules and considerations before springing into action or, well, words. If she would just step back and see the two of them now, she might realize what a funny picture they paint. The little mommy hovering over her once little brother. ]

Sshhh. Don't speak, you'll hurt your throat.

[ Takes his arm and tries to lead him to the nearest seat. She cups his face, rubbing a thumb over his forehead, and smiles, before taking a few steps toward the doorway. ]

I won't be long. You need to drink something.

action;

[slighted_stains]

[Incompetence morphs from nostalgia to embarrassment: she shouldn't have to see him like this, not when he's grown so much, in every way, body, mind, heart, as a practitioner. He isn't a child, and this isn't a squabble with a forlorn spirit, and curse it all, he should have mastered it better and not endangered the premise. Her premise.]

It's fine.

[He pats the seat to his right - unfortunate to keep her on his blind side, but at least Hokuto he can trust with that. A vengeance-prone specter wouldn't be as kind. ]

Please. It's unwise to move too much now. I don't know where it -

[No, not one. Far too strong to be one, two, a dozen.]

- they're focalized.

action;

[lipstickninja]

[ It's the authority in his voice that stuns her for the briefest moment, makes her question for once if anything has changed between them --not that she would mourn it, it would just be different. She contemplates striding off anyway --but no, not this time. ]

Were they that strong? Or-- were you just--?

[ Seals her lips, it doesn't matter anyway, and plops herself down on his right. She circles one arm around his, leaning her head against his shoulder. They used to meet eye-to-eye. ]

I'll stay with you where it's safe then.

[ where I can keep my eyes on you. ]

action;

[slighted_stains]

[Was he just...? Well, was he? Still an amateur, neither match for the Sakurazukamori's talent, nor worth his time as the leader of a rival clan? He had no answer to that. Sakurazuka Seishirou's death had answered many things, but not that.]

They're many, and they're old. One purification won't be enough. A hundred won't be enough.

[His temple tips to touch the top of her head, leaning against her; when they were younger, their heads would knock, crippling the gesture. Now it fits a little better, for all that everything else doesn't. He should mind having her hold their weight like this. He really doesn't.]

It's... like that sakura tree.

action;

[lipstickninja]

[ --holding back, was what she meant to say. But as with so many things now, she has lost count, the message is truncated, left unfinished, misunderstood. She grips his arm a little tighter. ]

How can something be so angry for so long?

[ And she doesn't wait for his answer, closing her eyes instead and wishing she can understand how it feels to be in his shoes. She wonders what he has been through-- what she put him through out of ignorance, selfishness, cruelty. She wouldn't blame him for thinking her cold-blooded. ]

It is yours now, isn't it, Subaru?

action;

[slighted_stains]

[His blood stills - it must have. His blood, or his heart, or his thoughts. Something. He could lie, of course. Distract her. Look slightly bereaved, or keep his silence. He could, if she were anyone else. But she has a right to know, and it's not one he'll deny her.]

...I don't know if it belongs to me.

[In the end, if he has to say, he can only do it in whispers.]

I think I belong to it.

[But this train, like that tree... he shouldn't be telling her things. She's not involved. He shouldn't burden her, but it's an old habit.]

If they're angry, it's because they've been hurt. Hokuto-chan, could they have been... lonely?

action;

[lipstickninja]

[ Right now she has this theory that if she can spot his torn edges and loose threads, spot the hollow in his heart so she can find something to fill it with --love, wishes, hobbies. She holds fast to it because there is no other way. ]

It stole you away.

[ From us, from me and tell me, tell me, how do I steal you back? She speaks in a hush, uncertain. ]

Loneliness turns us cold. It... hurts. Aches. But you're not angry, are you, Subaru? You just swallow it all and not a word of complaint.

action;

[slighted_stains]

[Stole him? I went willing. His hand goes automatically to check that his coat's still standing on her, that she won't get cold soon. She must be tired. Alive, well, sad, tired. And insecure, apparently, because she doesn't believe him.]

Can you imagine someone who can only say a few words? 'Thank you'? I feel...

[It's been a little long since he's tried expressing that fully. The lack of proper words - words that even Kamui might take to - frustrates him.]

I feel like that person. I only want to give thanks, right now. Not out of debt -

[though maybe out of fear of her soon disappearance.]

- but because I want to. You're here. So is... why would I complain? How could I?

action;

[lipstickninja]

[ I dragged you kicking and screaming into the trap, and all the best intentions make no difference --Now that makes her angry, so angry that she feels like lashing out at the world so they will know what they've-- she's done to her little brother. She's dripping with guilt and the only thing she can't bring herself to say is: did I do this to you? ]

I want to stay. I will.

[ Her voice cracks, because if he won't cry for himself then she will do it for him. If he won't demand retribution for all the wrongs that has been done against him then dammit she will. Swallowing the stone in her throat, she finds his hand and holds it tight. ]

I won't let anyone hurt you anymore-- I'll try-- If you know-- I don't have anything to lose except you, Subaru.