changeeee mmmk?
well. obviously i've been neglecting my journal. which is sad really, because i've had it for almost four years. so here i am, writing in here, neglecting my chores instead.
currently. well.
to say the least the past few weeks have been a stressful blur. i hate college applications. period. i hate them. they're stupid and expensive and i hate them. but, never the less i've filled out nearly seven now, but none of them are all the way complete or sent in. oh well. they'll get done. wednesday i had a "meeting" with sally. yeah, that was very very successful. i've been battling the decision to leave VNC completely, something i've thought about off and on for the past year or so. basically, i'm not doing sunday school anymore. her reasons made me cry at the time, but now they make me laugh. they're petty, and she wanted us on good terms. which is unrealistic, really. i used to love her, but she's a totally different person than the summer i met her, and its really sad. and considering i havent been to an actual service for some time, i have no reason to be a part of VNC. i dont agree with most of what they teach. i dont agree with spending money for a new sanctuary. i dont agree with how the youth are treated. and how having opinions basically means you're going to hell. i dont agree with the vnc adopts a pastor's wife program (..oops.). i agree with jesus, and from what i can see, i'm not getting Him from there. i have enough stress to deal with without having to worry about being a good enough christian for them, when it seems to be that they are having the same problem.
anyway. i feel better now. i'm starting peer tutoring on monday, which i am so so excited about. mrs. morales and i met during her exploratory teaching lecture, and i really want to work with her and her students. she teaches math during my SA hour, so thats what i get to help with. meeting mrs morales happened the same day as the unfortunate meeting at vnc. perhaps something to fill in that void? perhaps jesus knows what he's doing, after all.
and now my fathers walking around the house talking about how he's on the VU executive bored now. whaaattt?? ohh, time for work. see you.
currently. well.
to say the least the past few weeks have been a stressful blur. i hate college applications. period. i hate them. they're stupid and expensive and i hate them. but, never the less i've filled out nearly seven now, but none of them are all the way complete or sent in. oh well. they'll get done. wednesday i had a "meeting" with sally. yeah, that was very very successful. i've been battling the decision to leave VNC completely, something i've thought about off and on for the past year or so. basically, i'm not doing sunday school anymore. her reasons made me cry at the time, but now they make me laugh. they're petty, and she wanted us on good terms. which is unrealistic, really. i used to love her, but she's a totally different person than the summer i met her, and its really sad. and considering i havent been to an actual service for some time, i have no reason to be a part of VNC. i dont agree with most of what they teach. i dont agree with spending money for a new sanctuary. i dont agree with how the youth are treated. and how having opinions basically means you're going to hell. i dont agree with the vnc adopts a pastor's wife program (..oops.). i agree with jesus, and from what i can see, i'm not getting Him from there. i have enough stress to deal with without having to worry about being a good enough christian for them, when it seems to be that they are having the same problem.
anyway. i feel better now. i'm starting peer tutoring on monday, which i am so so excited about. mrs. morales and i met during her exploratory teaching lecture, and i really want to work with her and her students. she teaches math during my SA hour, so thats what i get to help with. meeting mrs morales happened the same day as the unfortunate meeting at vnc. perhaps something to fill in that void? perhaps jesus knows what he's doing, after all.
and now my fathers walking around the house talking about how he's on the VU executive bored now. whaaattt?? ohh, time for work. see you.