Another Council of Evil fic.

Mar 09, 2011 04:41

I'm stealing from both LittleKuriboh and michaeldj54  to post an EXTREMELY late gift-fic for dannychic . My apologies, Danny.

Keep in mind that this fic has had no beta-editior, so I apologize for any spelling or grammar errors.

Title: The Council of Skronk and Roll
Description: Insano creates a separate council of evil devoted solely to torturing Spoony.
Characters: Insano, Black Lantern Spoony, the Gatekeeper, the Hummel Figurine, and more!

Many figures sat in the dark, dusty attic, waiting silently for a single person to enter and bring purpose to this meeting.

Finally, the attic door swung open and the figure of a mad scientist came into view cackling wildly. "Welcome,"  Dr. Insano gleefully greeted his audience, "To another meeting of  The Council for the Grievance of Spoony! We have some new members so I will explain the purpose of this group of degenerates. You all have proven yourselves quite adept at torturing my landlord, and after being forced to repair an Atari Jaguar, I want to insure that we finally break him!"    Insano looked around to find the others only answering him with more silence and bored looks on their faces. "Well, let's call roll. Ask That Guy?"

All of those in attendance sat in utter silence looking around the room for a creepy man in a bath robe. He was oddly missing. Insano shrugged and was about to move on when a Hummel figurine suddenly appeared in Ask that Guuy's usual spot at the table. Its demonic voice echoed through the room.

"My babushka is made out Clifford the Dog's ass, and soon YOUR SOUL!"

Insano flinched for a moment before making a mark on his clipboard. "You know a simple 'Here' would suffice. This is your third time subbing for Ask That Guy." Insano didn't leave a gap in the conversation for the Hell-forged ceramic figure to retort, continuing to move down the list Black Lantern Spoony?"

"Flesh."

"Right then... the Gatekeeper?"

The sound of a thunderclap echoed through the room, making all those in attendance jump in their seats except for a single cloaked figure who leaned forward and screamed, "SILENCE! I AM . . .THE GATEKEEPER! YOU WILL LISTEN TO ME, MAGGOT, OR YOU WILL BE PUNISHED!"

Insano simply sighed and placed another check mark on his clipboard. 'These meetings just get more and more ridiculous,' he thought to himself.

"Pumpkinhead?"

The room was suddenly filled with music as a figure with a large, ripe pumpkin began to dance around the room. Nearly everyone looked on in awe. Everyone except for the mad scientist in attendance, who was repeatedly slamming his head into the table.

After the music came to a halt and Pumpkinhead took its seat, Insano glanced at his clipboard to see that there was only one more name on the list. 'Thank Science,' he thought. Then he glanced again at the name on the list and was tempted to flee the room from the insanity that was about to emerge.

Insano sighed in resignation and called the final name on his list. "Ultimate Warrior?"

A shirtless man sporting face-paint and tassels wrapped around his arms sprang from his seat. "AHHHHHH I CAN FEEL IT, DUDE! THE POWER OF THE WARRIOR IS COURSING THROUGH ME! MY SOUL IS FILLED WITH THE POWERS OF THOSE WHO CAME BEFORE AND THOSE THAT WILL BE!

20 long minutes of insane ramblings later.

I HAVE BEEN TRANSFORMED INTO THE END ALL AND BE ALL. I WILL COME FOR YOU HOAK HOGAN, AND THERE WILL BE NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP THE POWER OF THE WARRIOR, AHHH!!!!! *SKRONK*

Insano sat in his seat weeping for a full-minute after the Warrior was done speaking.

"What the fuck was that? I associate with demons and the souls of the damned and I have never heard something so insane or idiotic in my entire life."

"FLESH. BLOOD."

When Insano was done weeping like a little girl he spoke in a tone dripping with sarcasm. "Surely THIS is the most threatening group of villains in all the universe. Finally, we can move on to the purpose of this meeting!"

Suddenly the door to the room was kicked in revealing a rather irritated internet reviewer. "That's it Insano! I'm tired of you bringing your freeloader friends into my house, eating up my food, and shouting loudly while I'm trying to work. GET THE FUCK OUT!"

"How do you plan to kick us out by yourself?"

"YOU WILL BE PUNISHED AND SENT TO THE BLAGHOLE!"

The Warrior and Gate Keeper skronked in unison.

"Oh, I'm not by myself. I brought help," said The Spoony One with a smirk. He grabbed a boombox and popped in a CD, his finger hovering over the play button.

Dr. Insano giggled madly. "What did you recruit Soundwave to beat us up?"

Spoony simply chuckled  and pressed play. The boombox loudly played the sound of glass shattering before a loud electric guitar kicked in. A smirking and familiar figure with a shaved head and goatee entered their field of vision. Dr. Insano practically shit his pants as the Toughest SOB in the history of the WWE stood before him.

The Mad Scientist managed to mutter "Oh shit," before Stone Cold Steve Austin gave him the finger and a stunner.

tgwtg_fic, fic, council of evil, insano

Previous post
Up