Humbug

[slicensmile]

Christmas eve was pretty much a failure.  My sister insisted that we wait for her to get home to get a tree, which meant waiting until today.  So we did.  And then my dad, whose heart skips a beat any time any tiny detail of his plans go wrong, accidentally breaks the Christmas tree stand.  And then, because there's only one Christmas tree stand model in the whole world that works for him we spend four hours driving around town in a panic trying to find one, and of course everyone's sold out.  By the time we finally find one that works, all the places to buy trees are closed.  And my sister really had her heart set on a tree, so now she's sad.  I guess it makes me sad too; we've never not had one before.  But I would much rather have just relaxed at home with my family than run around all day in a panic... and everything feels different anyway because it's only been a month since mom died.  I just wanted my family to be together and happy for a little while, tree or no tree, presents or no presents.  It's so frustrating when that stuff gets in the way of just being able to freaking relax and let down your guard for once.

Don't let this bring you down, but uh... yeah.  No snow, no tree, no decorations, no mom.  Rough year.