(no subject)
right now im not feeling so hot. Things are weird for me on all fronts right now. Im focusing too much on down things instead of what i can do to fix those things. there are some things that are ok, nothing really great. Maybe im depressed right now because i just dont have the motovation to do anything, i mean anything. My body is hating me with the way i eat. first I couldnt stop eating fatty foods now the thought of food isnt very exciting to me. all i want to do is drink and sleep. I force myself to go run errands. I actually have shit i got to do. Im hoping i will be gone by july, but now work has drastically cut hours and if it continues im going to have to go do the plasma or find another job asap.
I think this is my reaction to the way roy treated me and still is treating me. Its like he knows im better for him and i would make him happy and he tells me this but yet he went back to the girl he bitches about so much. everyone at work is sick of him bitching about her, no one wants to hear it. Hes different from when we first started haning out and going on dates. He was like the perfect amount of bad boy for me, now hes her little bitch. Hes allowed to have freinds, but he cant talk to them on the phone, text, or hang out without her totally freaking out. at first i was playin it cool by not talking shit, now im letting it out at him when i can. Like when he complains im like you choose that so now you have to love it so shut up. and when he texts me with i miss you, im like then come visit and then he says some pussy excuse. damn i wish the sex wasnt fucking amazing.
I think this is my reaction to the way roy treated me and still is treating me. Its like he knows im better for him and i would make him happy and he tells me this but yet he went back to the girl he bitches about so much. everyone at work is sick of him bitching about her, no one wants to hear it. Hes different from when we first started haning out and going on dates. He was like the perfect amount of bad boy for me, now hes her little bitch. Hes allowed to have freinds, but he cant talk to them on the phone, text, or hang out without her totally freaking out. at first i was playin it cool by not talking shit, now im letting it out at him when i can. Like when he complains im like you choose that so now you have to love it so shut up. and when he texts me with i miss you, im like then come visit and then he says some pussy excuse. damn i wish the sex wasnt fucking amazing.