Local attractions
So we're going to visit Springfield MO for my uncle Tom's 5th of July family reunion next week, and I was amused by the list of "local attractions" provided by the hotel where we'll be staying:
Local Attractions-Next to Alltel Corporate Office and Jack Henry and Associates-Baptist Bible College - 0 miles-Bowling - 0 miles-Central Bible College - 0 miles-Cox Hospital - 0 miles-Drury University - 0 miles-Evangel University - 0 miles-Fishing - 0 miles
-Golf - 0 miles-MSU - 0 miles-PFI Western Store - 0 miles-St. Johns Hospital - 0 miles-Wildlife Museum - 0 miles-Battlefield Mall - 1.5 miles-Bass Pro Shop - 3 miles-Branson Missouri - 35 miles
Better remember to bring our guns and Bibles, I guess :) I don't know if the sequence is pray/hunt/hospital, hunt/hospital/pray, or possibly hospital/pray/hunt if your bargain with god was to let you live through this health crisis so you could kill something. Or maybe praying after shooting yourself for too much time spent in Branson, otherwise known as "Las Vegas if it were designed by Ned Flanders."