(no subject)
I just slept on the heaviest news of my life. I wanted to wake up and wash my face and wash my hair and forget about this whole thing. Forget about the last 3 years of my life.
I was lied to every single day of that relationship. Every single day. I was cheated. Not once, not twice, not three times. I was with a cheater. A lying, disguisting cheater.
What do you do when someone tells you that everything you knew, everything you trusted, everything you thought was real, was a huge lie? How do you trust again, and how the hell do you know what love is?
I'm starting a new life, right here, right now. This is the end, the very end, of a toxic downward spiral. Maybe this is what was needed to get him out of my life, for good. To finally not speak to him, not look at him, not ever think his name, without feeling guilty. For the first time, I truly feel that I owe him NOTHING. And he owes me my life back.
I was lied to every single day of that relationship. Every single day. I was cheated. Not once, not twice, not three times. I was with a cheater. A lying, disguisting cheater.
What do you do when someone tells you that everything you knew, everything you trusted, everything you thought was real, was a huge lie? How do you trust again, and how the hell do you know what love is?
I'm starting a new life, right here, right now. This is the end, the very end, of a toxic downward spiral. Maybe this is what was needed to get him out of my life, for good. To finally not speak to him, not look at him, not ever think his name, without feeling guilty. For the first time, I truly feel that I owe him NOTHING. And he owes me my life back.