Crappy 1st Day.
Hey guys.
I've had two pretty crappy days. Yesterday my Credit Card was overdrawn by some internet company that I've never heard of. I spent most of the day trying to figure out what to do and didn't get it sorted out until today.
Today was also my first day at college. I expected a whole bunch of Rooogy peoples at a historical college but I was quite mistaken.
Today was a drag. My new classmates aren’t very nice. They are all either the ditzy tee-hee Barbie doll kind of girls or big dumb brainless boys.
Cars, Clubbing, Sex and Fashion seemed to be the only things they enjoyed discussing. I felt alienated. I sat by myself in the back corner near the window.
We did a stupid activity in which each of us in turn had to walk to the front of the class and pour out a categorical list of who we are… our interests… our hobbies… our job…. Etc… I had to go first… The wonderful teacher knew exactly how to make me feel comfortable… “Lee your all by yourself up the back, come say hello and make some new friends”
(JERK!)
“Hey everyone, I’m Lee, uh… I’m not all that good at self-analyzing so I’ll just skip that part… interests…” It seemed at that moment everyone in the whole room was staring at me with that ‘what a loser’ look… “I’m a bit of a writer, I write mostly fantasy fiction and I hope to be published one day”… again I felt their eyes boring into me… “I enjoy doing poi… that’s fire twirling…” …audible snickers… “And I’m starting wing chun again next week after being out of practice for about four years.”
It seemed they were no longer listening so the teacher prodded me to continue… “and what do you do for a living?”
“Oh I’m a blacksmith with the Historical Society.” I was about to run back to my seat when the teacher snapped “Not so fast! Has anyone got any questions for Lee?” please let there be no questions I thought to myself…
A ditzy girl sitting next to the window audibly chewing on gum piped up and my heart sank…“like… What do like blacksmiths make n stuff?”
“Well” I began doggedly “I work for the Historical Society so I make swords and armor, we also…” I was cut off by a numbskull in the back row,
“Are you one of those crazy people that like dresses up n stuff and pretends to have wars n stuff?” He was mocking me it was obvious and the class audibly giggled… “No, I just make em…” If only I could have met him in a dark alley…
“Alright who’s next…” the teacher interjected…. Finally… I skulked back to my desk…
There was this one girl though, she sat by herself in class and sat by herself on the break. The whole time she seemed to be recoiling into herself, some place deep down inside where she would be safe. Or that’s how it seemed to me perhaps I was just projecting.
She wore a dark sweater with a hood and some black jeans. I don’t think she wanted to be noticed but she was next called.
(This is going to sound strange but I wanted to tell someone…)
I didn’t really hear what she said. She sort of put me in a trance. She looked right into my eyes. I felt her gaze boring into my mind. I felt cold. Her eyes were so blue... like someone had painted them on. I felt like I couldn’t move. I felt like I knew her… like I’d always known her… For three or four minutes her eyes were planted on mine… then it was over… the trance was broken… and I felt we were as different again as we were before. I thought about sitting with her after the break, although I didn’t know what to say.
I walked into the classroom. She was alone in the back corner bent over her desk writing on a piece of paper. I sat alone.
When we were dismissed she almost ran out. I looked to the desk where she was sitting and found a piece of paper. On it were written the words…
‘I am myself, but not who I am. You understand.’
I don’t know what happened… It was so haunting… so cold but comforting… I wonder who she is… I don’t understand…
Hoping you guys are doing better then me.
~Mr Scribe~
I've had two pretty crappy days. Yesterday my Credit Card was overdrawn by some internet company that I've never heard of. I spent most of the day trying to figure out what to do and didn't get it sorted out until today.
Today was also my first day at college. I expected a whole bunch of Rooogy peoples at a historical college but I was quite mistaken.
Today was a drag. My new classmates aren’t very nice. They are all either the ditzy tee-hee Barbie doll kind of girls or big dumb brainless boys.
Cars, Clubbing, Sex and Fashion seemed to be the only things they enjoyed discussing. I felt alienated. I sat by myself in the back corner near the window.
We did a stupid activity in which each of us in turn had to walk to the front of the class and pour out a categorical list of who we are… our interests… our hobbies… our job…. Etc… I had to go first… The wonderful teacher knew exactly how to make me feel comfortable… “Lee your all by yourself up the back, come say hello and make some new friends”
(JERK!)
“Hey everyone, I’m Lee, uh… I’m not all that good at self-analyzing so I’ll just skip that part… interests…” It seemed at that moment everyone in the whole room was staring at me with that ‘what a loser’ look… “I’m a bit of a writer, I write mostly fantasy fiction and I hope to be published one day”… again I felt their eyes boring into me… “I enjoy doing poi… that’s fire twirling…” …audible snickers… “And I’m starting wing chun again next week after being out of practice for about four years.”
It seemed they were no longer listening so the teacher prodded me to continue… “and what do you do for a living?”
“Oh I’m a blacksmith with the Historical Society.” I was about to run back to my seat when the teacher snapped “Not so fast! Has anyone got any questions for Lee?” please let there be no questions I thought to myself…
A ditzy girl sitting next to the window audibly chewing on gum piped up and my heart sank…“like… What do like blacksmiths make n stuff?”
“Well” I began doggedly “I work for the Historical Society so I make swords and armor, we also…” I was cut off by a numbskull in the back row,
“Are you one of those crazy people that like dresses up n stuff and pretends to have wars n stuff?” He was mocking me it was obvious and the class audibly giggled… “No, I just make em…” If only I could have met him in a dark alley…
“Alright who’s next…” the teacher interjected…. Finally… I skulked back to my desk…
There was this one girl though, she sat by herself in class and sat by herself on the break. The whole time she seemed to be recoiling into herself, some place deep down inside where she would be safe. Or that’s how it seemed to me perhaps I was just projecting.
She wore a dark sweater with a hood and some black jeans. I don’t think she wanted to be noticed but she was next called.
(This is going to sound strange but I wanted to tell someone…)
I didn’t really hear what she said. She sort of put me in a trance. She looked right into my eyes. I felt her gaze boring into my mind. I felt cold. Her eyes were so blue... like someone had painted them on. I felt like I couldn’t move. I felt like I knew her… like I’d always known her… For three or four minutes her eyes were planted on mine… then it was over… the trance was broken… and I felt we were as different again as we were before. I thought about sitting with her after the break, although I didn’t know what to say.
I walked into the classroom. She was alone in the back corner bent over her desk writing on a piece of paper. I sat alone.
When we were dismissed she almost ran out. I looked to the desk where she was sitting and found a piece of paper. On it were written the words…
‘I am myself, but not who I am. You understand.’
I don’t know what happened… It was so haunting… so cold but comforting… I wonder who she is… I don’t understand…
Hoping you guys are doing better then me.
~Mr Scribe~